Alpha Aria

Chapter 7- Discovery

**ARIA**

The packhouse was whirling with preparations for the Alpha Summit. I could see the activity buzzing from my bedroom window. Different delivery vans were coming and going down the main street, dropping off various equipment that was necessary for the event. Omegas were scurrying with their arms full of boxes, no doubt filled with vases and other decorations, to and from the packhouse. Everyone seemed happy and there was excitement in the air. Groaning, I shut my window and drew my curtains closed.

The week had sped by. Tomorrow was Friday and the last day of school. We were getting out at noon so that we had time to go home and get ready for the Opening Feast. Uncle Bill had convinced me that I needed to attend. He pointed out that as the previous Alpha’s daughter it would be rude not to. I wasn’t sure what to wear or how to act. WIth my birthday being the next day, it would be my last night before turning 18 and officially becoming an adult.

Without a wolf, according to werewolf law, the Alpha had every right to banish me from the pack grounds. I shuddered at the thought of living amongst humans. This was my home and the only place I had ever known. I had only ventured outside of the backgrounds once, when Luna Caroline had tried to take me shopping at the human mall when I turned 13. I remembered that day clearly. I'd had such a bad panic attack as we left our territory, that Luna Caroline had to bring me back almost immediately.

Alpha Brian was my father’s Beta and had taken the Alpha title when he had died. I was grateful to him and his mate, Luna Caroline, for being so kind to me after my parents had passed. My Uncle had taken me in and raised me, but Luna Caroline was like a second mom to me. I was lucky that I had such an amazing support system and I was fairly certain that Alpha Brian wouldn’t banish me. However, my anxiety still played on my nerves.

I wished I could call Diego and talk with him about all of this. I had avoided him all week. It was the longest we had been apart and I longed to see him, but I wasn't ready yet. I didn’t know how to find the words to tell him how I felt. I snorted at the irony. Would I ever find the words? Ha. The fact I could never actually use my voice to tell him how he made me feel stung me bitterly.

My thoughts drifted back to the night earlier in the week when he had tried to kiss me. I remembered how handsome he looked under the moonlight. His light brown hair was tousled and falling into his face, partially covering his gorgeous caramel eyes. Oh, those eyes. I could get lost in them. His adorable lopsided grin and single dimple. His tee shirt tight across his chest, stretched across his muscles and broad shoulders.

I felt heat rising in my core and I noticed that I was breathing rapidly. What was this strange feeling? It felt like my mind wasn't my own as I kept imagining his lips caressing my own. My stomach fluttered and I pushed my pelvis forward as though my body was reaching for him. I flushed, slightly embarrassed at my actions. What the heck was going on with me? Suddenly, without thinking, I slid my hands under the waistband of my night shorts and into my panties. My breath hitched as I gently pushed into my folds and realized with surprise that I was wet.

My fingers explored the area, and when they touched my cl¡toris I felt a jolt of pleasure shoot through me. While I knew logically what m**********n was, and I had read about hormones and arousal, I had never experienced these sensations before. They were pleasantly surprising but I was still confused as to why I was suddenly feeling them when I never had before.

I pushed that thought out of my mind and moved my fingers around, allowing myself to think of Diego again. A soft moan left my lips and I bucked as I swirled around my sensitive bud. With his image dancing through my mind, I continued to swirl and dip my fingers until I felt a pressure building deep in my core and at last, my body shuddered with release, my toes curling and my back arching.

After the last spasms had finally gone, I let out a deep breath and relaxed. A smile pulled at the corners of my mouth as I realized with exhilaration that I had just had my first orgasm. I had actually felt s****l, horny and… well, normal. I hadn't ever felt arousal like that before, but somehow thinking of Diego made things inside me stir.

I thought back to my health class in school when we were learning about different kinds of sexuality and I vaguely remembered one that was about only feeling s****l attraction when you had a deep personal connection with someone. I couldn't remember what it was called, but I wondered if that's what I was. It would make sense. We did share a deep connection. He was my very best friend and I loved him with all my heart. I had just never realized before that my love for him was anything more than platonic.

It was so clear to me now that I had feelings for him that went beyond friendship. Judging from his actions earlier in the week, he did too. The epiphany of this truth made my heart pound with excitement. I sat up, grabbed my phone and started to type a text to tell him to meet me at the park so we could talk.

Then my heart sank as reality hit me. It could never work. As much as I wanted to run to him and throw my arms around him and kiss him, I couldn't bear to get in the way of his happiness with his true mate. He deserved to be with his destined mate, chosen by Selene, and that was obviously not me. If I confessed my feelings and we began a relationship, what would happen to our friendship when he found her? I couldn't bear to lose him like that.

I quickly deleted my text and threw my phone across the room, frustrated. Tears stung my eyes and I wiped them away bitterly. I refused to cry, despite that my heart felt like it was tearing into pieces. Why was I always having to sacrifice everything? My parents, my voice, my wolf, my heart. I had nothing left. Nothing.

I threw my upper half backwards onto my bed with a loud huff, irritation rising in me. The more I thought about it the more angry I became. All my life I had simply tried to make the best of what was handed to me. I never complained, I didn't throw myself pity parties. I just sucked it up and dealt with it to the best of my ability. When I felt helpless and vulnerable after the attack, I asked for permission to start warrior training. When my anxiety and depression felt insurmountable, I started seeing a therapist. When I lost my voice, I learned sign language.

Sitting around feeling sorry for myself was never an option for me before. Right now, however, I was vacillating between pity party and anger, not being able to decide where to land. It wasn't until I started to see red that I realized that I was no longer feeling sorrowful, I was furious.

I was angry at the moon goddess for keeping my wolf from me and withholding the blessing of magic that was my birthright. I was angrier with her for not helping to protect my parents. I was enraged at the horrible rogues that attacked them. And I was furious with the worst of the rogues, that one eyed monstrous devil. His evil actions that day haunted me. How dare he violate my mother's corpse in the worst way imaginable!

With a jolt of adrenaline, I sprang from my bed. I swapped my pajama shorts for some gym shorts and threw on my running shoes. I didn’t bother to put on a regular shirt as my night shirt was a cami top anyway. No one would notice or care.

I quickly ran down the stairs, through the dining room, past my uncle and out the front door, barely registering that he was sitting at the kitchen table on his laptop. I think he called out to me asking where I was going but I didn't stop.

It was early evening and still light out. Without paying attention to where I was headed, I started jogging. I needed to run, to burn away this rage.

I pushed myself faster and faster and soon I was in the forest, racing toward the border of our territory. My mind was dizzy with emotions whirling around me. Anger, pain, regret. The physical toll the emotions had on me was too much. My stomach felt like it was twisting in knots, causing pain to ripple through my whole body. Spots clouded my vision and I felt lightheaded.

I could hear my father screaming. Run Aria! My lungs burned from my exertion. Voices shouted from behind me, they sounded familiar but I didn't understand them. Everything sounded like it was under water. The trees were a blur as I ran faster than I had ever run before.

Growling and snarling sounds surrounded me and the vision of my father collapsing on the forest floor filled my head. The one eyed monster bent over my mother, violating her corpse. His head whipped around and his single eye bore into my soul. MINE he growled.

Suddenly, the breath was knocked out of me as I collided into something. I spun around as I fell to the ground and felt my head hit something hard, and a loud crack thundered through my body, along with a burst of pain. Darkness enveloped me and my eyes fluttered closed. My last thought before I drifted away was so this is what it feels like to die.

*****

I was floating. An ethereal voice echoed through the darkness. You're okay, I've got you. I opened my eyes and a blurry face stared down at me. Was it a fae? I could make out the outline of a pixie cut, I think the hair was violet. It must be a fae collecting me to bring me to the afterlife. There were so many colors dancing around their head, swirling and making me dizzy. Don't worry, you're going to be fine. That beautiful voice again. I felt safe. My eyes closed and the darkness consumed me once more.