The Nobleman's Angel

Chapter 5

Our house — once a home — is a complete mess; all colors and love gone. It was my fault to begin with. If only I am careful enough, I wouldn't lose the thing that keeps our marriage intact. I am the one to blame: an artist whose color has faded — what an irony. I couldn't paint my marriage lively and full of love. We can do it together, with both our hands, but the reality is he has given up trying to mend what was broken.

I couldn't take the reality so I made-up another world — a world where there is happiness in misery. I am aware this relationship swallows my existence, but there is no harm in trying, right? I haven't given it all. I want to fix things with him despite the fact that he is hurting me, because that is what love is, right? You wouldn't leave someone you love even if it hurts.

My husband makes me happy. He may be hurting me, but at least his simple gestures make me happy. He is always taking care of me after he has done that thing. If he doesn't love me like before, he would left me bleeding. Yes, my husband loves me still. I will do everything just to make this marriage work, even if that means

I touched my face and groaned as a response to the pain. Another bruise on my face — but it is alright. He never let me go outside, which is agreeable because no amount of make-up can cover up these bruises.

I sighed in frustration. I would be lying if I say I do not want to go out. I forgot how beautiful the world is in months of being like this. As soon as I thought of escaping, a sudden image of my husband flashed. He loves me; he doesn't want me to be seen like this. He knows how I hate being pitied. Yes, it is what it is.

To my realization, I am crying already. I wept uncontrollably while remembering our sweetest moments and how it ended in just a blink of an eye. Why did everything end up like this? I often ask myself this, only to feel miserable. Everything ended up like this because of me. He loves me still even if he is hurting me. That is his way to cope up with the pain I caused the both of us.

He loves me.

But why am I trying to make a fool out of myself? He has completely gone mad. To think that I chose to stay with this monster, am I crazier than he is? He doesn't love you. If he does, he will never abuse you physically and emotionally.

Wake up, Audere.

I don't want to wake up.

"Why do you want to see me, Audere?"

I woke up from daze. She is looking at me worriedly while gently touching my hands. I want to break down, but I need to keep myself together since we are in a public place.

The faint smell of coffee is traceable throughout the place. Normally this smell calms me down, but today is different. My heart wouldn't stop getting anxious. I already took my medication after I read the text yet it didn't help a bit.

I stared at the woman in front of me — a sophisticated woman with a sense of justice. She is the one who rescued me from my husband's hands after she got a call from our neighbor, reporting that there is a havoc going on next door. I am thankful for this woman and my neighbor, if it weren't for them, I would be dead by now.

"Tori..." I called her name, purposely lowering my voice down so I won't look anxious, "where is he?" Almost a whisper came out from my mouth.

Tori's eyes widened and became uncertain. I knew something is wrong through her gestures. Tori is a calm woman; nothing can sway her, but with my question, I can say that she wavered a bit.

"I don't want to scare you, dear. I am finding a right time to tell you." She paused and reluctantly plastered a comforting smile, as if she is telling me it's gonna be alright.

This is what I am scared about. Nothing will be alright if my hunch is right all along.

"Tell me now, Tori." I said sternly. Her hands left mine as she clasped her hands together. I know Tori, she does this when she has to say something that might scare me.

"He escaped last two nights." Tori whispered, but enough to hear me. My heart dropped at this moment. I couldn't feel myself anymore. Everything is a blur.

Two nights of being unaware to danger, I whispered to myself. I am still living in our house and he pledged on his name he would go back just to kill me. I could only tremble while assuming that he is following me, creeping behind me and waiting for a chance to stab me at the back.

That explains the text message and the call from an unknown number. I haven't changed my number even after he got jailed up. Stupidity endangered me this time. How can I be so careless? I should've changed my number and moved away from that house!

"Sorry for not telling you. I know you are at risk, but Lazarus told me not to tell you because he didn't want you to be afraid." Tori explained as she smiled apologetically.

Anger arose in me after she said that Lazarus knew it all along and he didn't tell me, but I remained quiet, just trying to feel myself again. We're going to talk later, Laz.

"How did that happen?" I asked Tori after I calmed myself down.

Tori took a sip from her coffee and fixed her eyes on me, "To tell you the truth, even the authorities are baffled how the hell he escaped. There is no escape route, no tunnels found, the bars of his cellar are very narrow so there is no way could fit in." She explained.

I shivered. He has fulfilled his pledge. I swallowed the lump in my throat. My chest is hurting because of what is happening. I have no idea where to go or where to hide when the time comes.

"Drill this on to your damn mind, Audere. The moment I step outside this prison, I'm going to blow your brains out!"

I hear his voice again. I shut my eyes off, hoping that this is just a dream, but I already knew this is the reality I must face. Things are getting out of hand. I assumed I am safe and sound; however, it was only for a year. How can I go on with my life if he is now free to hurt me?

"But don't worry; the authorities are doing their best. Just stick with Laz; he is going to protect you." Tori assured after I sighed heavily.

I shook my head as a response, "I wouldn't bother Laz this time, Tori. I need to learn how to protect myself." I said casually.

It has been on my mind for a long time — I need to protect myself. I am too tired of being dependent on other people. I need to stand on my own feet. After all, I've been taking too much of Lazarus' time. He has his own life and priorities, and I have mine, not everything will revolve around me.

"I see," Tori nodded. "You need to learn how to defend yourself first. Maybe you should buy a gun or master martial arts." She suggested.

I took a sip from the teacup, "I'd go for the latter. I do not like carrying a gun with me." I explained.

I have a fear of guns. Pretty absurd, I know. My ex-husband loved collecting guns and our house was filled with different kinds of it.  When our marriage broke down into pieces after that thing happened, he started getting violent with me. I remember one time when I tried to call for help, he shot my ankle just to disable me. He is that vicious.

With regards to martial arts, I am always interested in taking lessons but never got the will to finally do it. My life after marriage revolved around arts since my ex-husband wouldn't allow me to draw and paint. I was a prisoner of his love, I still am, but not the same as before. What I feel right now is not love, it is fear and apprehension dressed up as love.

"Call this number." Tori opened her bag to give me a business card. I immediately read what is written on it. The text is in bold, which gave me the impression of firmness. It says, with a telephone number under the business name:

SHINIGAMI

"They offer free courses for women who underwent domestic abuse. I personally know the owner, he is a part of our organization and he is a great man. The business was established to help women feel empowered." She explained.

One thing I like about Tori is that she has so much connection because of her work. I am grateful she became one of my closest friends despite the huge age gap. Tori is a forty-five year old woman while I am only twenty seven, but we both understand each other. We were both abused by our ex-husbands so that is probably the reason why we clicked easily.

I gave her a smile, "I'll check this out later." I promised her.

"Shinigami is only one street away. Do you want to check the place out?" Tori suggested which I declined.

"No need, I need to talk to Laz. Thank you for meeting with me." I said sincerely. Tori just gave me a pat on my shoulder to assure me everything's going to be fine.

I could only hope for the best.

After I met with Tori, I carefully went back to my car, constantly turning my back in case he is just behind me. I hate being scared by the person I despise because that means he won over me again.

Not a chance.

It is four o'clock in the afternoon. The sky is gloomy and lifeless. A sigh came out of my lips again. Seems like the sky is with me right now, huh? The sun is nowhere to be found. I often find the sun if I am having a bad day. Now, it isn't here to remind me that another day is another hope, I could only sigh and feel bad.

I turned on the radio just to listen to music, but even the radio wouldn't cooperate with me. Only a news report is being read by the reporter.

"Another woman was found dead only this time at the coast. The body was unidentified, but authorities assume it was a body of a missing woman named Michelle Johnson."

I turned the radio off before fear comes over me. What is happening to West Coast? Yesterday they found a woman at Viar Street, and now they found another. I must be very careful now, knowing that my ex-husband is running free and an unknown killer is haunting woman as prey.

I prayed to God silently to protect me from danger. I hope he hears me this time for he never listens to me. Never in my life my prayers were answered by him. The day I got rescued, it wasn't a call from God, but only a call from my neighbour got me saved.

I have so many things to do. I haven't even started my project and finished my most awaited masterpiece I've been working on for a year. Such a bad timing all of these things are happening at the same time. How I hate what is happening and how I hate I am not doing something to make the best out of this situation.

I shook my head. Nothing can be done this time. I could only protect myself and wait for miracle to happen. I hope they catch my ex-husband soon. I thought of something earlier when I was with Tori. If there is no way my ex-husband can escape, then why did he escape – unless there is a person who helped him out without any struggle.

I don't know anymore. I don't want to overthink again.

I stopped my car in front of a psychiatric hospital. Lazarus works here until six in the evening. We have no sessions today, but I have to see him so that I can find my peace. I need Laz especially this time of distress and we have to talk about the fact that he hid something very important from me. I understand Laz, but this time what he did is risky not just for me but also for him.

I checked my phone to see if he has text message. There is none. As I am going to put down my phone, my idiocy made me stop again.

How stupid I was to forget reporting the text message to Tori! I knew she is a part of a Cybercrime Prevention Unit of West Coast and she can track an unknown number! Stupid, Audere!

I sighed once again. Nevermind, Laz is here to help me. He already knew that monster escaped from prison and I reckon he is also teaming up with the authorities, because if not, why would he talk to Tori?

I shut my eyes off and sighed heavily to relax my nerves. Laz is here, there is no fear — I remind myself. I opened my eyes after a moment and was shocked to see Laz with a woman walking from the entrance to his car.

The woman's arm is linked with Laz's masculine arm. They are talking while laughing wholeheartedly. This is the first time I have seen the woman and this is the first time I have seen Lazarus with another woman aside from his patients and Tori. The woman beside him is not a typical woman.

She is wearing a little black dress and silver heels. The jewelries on her neck and wrist shimmered with her blinding beauty. The way she walks is sophisticated and gentle. She is very beautiful too, with her blonde hair, blue eyes and porcelain skin. Unlike me who has a jet-black hair and brown eyes. My skin is fair, but very pale.

Laz opened the door for her. I could only look at his eyes doting on the beautiful woman in front of him. My heart broke into million pieces as he drove away from me. I shrank on my seat, shame got me for good.

Who am I trying to fool? Laz is a distinct man. His family is insanely wealthy. The woman earlier seems like his match, unlike me who is wretched and poor woman who did nothing but to put burden on his shoulders.

I drove away from West Coast and away from Lazarus Ysmael Carson.