The Wizard Prince's Rebel Soulmate

Chapter 3

Matteo moved the food on his plate around with the fork in his hand, pretending to listen to his wife. She was talking about her favourite topic, having a baby. Or more specifically, why they didn’t have one yet, why she couldn’t get pregnant at all. Of course he couldn’t tell her, that in order to have a baby, they ought to have s*x first, but he had humoured her a few weeks ago when she’d insisted they had to consult a medical professional to see, if there was any issue that prevented them from conceiving. The doctor found nothing, because the issue was Matteo.

After a year of marriage, he wasn’t frustrated any more, in fact, he felt nothing at all. He’d resigned himself to the fact, that this was his life now, and there was nothing he could do about it. It’s not that Emma was bad, after their wedding she did everything she could to make him happy. Brought him lunch when he was busy with his father. Smiled brightly at his side during meetings with important leaders. Made sure he didn’t forget any appointments. Basically, she was his secretary.

She also hadn’t tried sneaking into his bedroom anymore, or initiated any remotely romantic or intimate action. Instead, she waited for him to come to her room when he decided to. Lately, she made sure to remind him when it would be a good time for her to get pregnant, and he made sure to follow that calendar, even though the s*x they had happened purely in her mind.

Altea begrudgingly kept providing the potion necessary to make Emma fall asleep quickly, but Matteo could tell that his sister was nearing the end of her patience with him. She said she was on his side, but he was asking too much of her, and he knew it.

“I’m trying a new potion that my great-aunt recommended, and she had seven children, so she swears it worked for her. I sent you the calendar for this month, so you can plan ahead, ok?” Matteo forced a smile.

This was their monthly date night. In a moment of weakness, he’d agreed to it after feeling bad for treating her in a way she didn’t deserve. He knew that Emma wasn’t a bad person, and truth be told, he could have imagined himself being happily married to her if he had never met Aurora. Emma was a nice enough person, whose only goal in life seemed to be to make him, her husband, happy. And one day, she would make a formidable queen; apart from being young and beautiful, she was kind and fair, but also organized and ruthless when the situation required it. He hadn’t forgiven her for sending those men after Aurora, but he understood why she did it, and she kept her word when she promised to stop.

Today, they’d gone to Castel Fragsburg, and gotten one of the tables on the panoramic terrace overlooking the vast apple orchards of the Adige valley. Egon Heiss, the chef himself, had come outside to greet them and talk them through the menu of the evening, while the maître arranged the wine pairings for them. Emma only ordered water, ‘just in case’. The waiter had just brought out the fish course, Char Meunière with fennel, but Matteo had lost his appetite now that they were talking about having children again. Instead, he enjoyed his wine while trying to focus on the view instead of on Emma’s blabbering.

“Matteo, are you listening to me?”

He swallowed the sip of wine before turning his gaze back to her.

“Sorry, I was just thinking about something father said to me today. What did you say?”

This excuse almost always worked, as Emma understood that whatever the King said was more important than her.

“I said, maybe we should consider getting help. We’ve been trying for a year now, and I’m still not pregnant, and I know the doctor said everything looks fine, how can it be fine if nothing happens?”

“What kind of help are you talking about?” Matteo enquired.

“Like, maybe we should try IVF or something like that. What do you think?”

Matteo thought about it. On one hand, he felt guilty for not holding up his end of the bargain. Obviously, Emma was right in wanting to have children, and he lied to her and made her worry that there was something wrong with her. He just couldn’t bring himself to sleep with her, no matter how hard he tried. And he did, after a few months, he thought he’d finally gotten a grip on himself and was determined to try and finally consummate their marriage. But when it was time, he just couldn’t do it. He chickened out and just went through with his usual, frustrating routine.

Now, on the other hand, considering IVF sounded like a great compromise. Emma would have the baby she wanted, the kingdom would get its heir, and he didn’t have to touch her at all. Maybe having a child with Emma would finally help him form some kind of bond with her, as the mother of his child.

“Maybe we should do some research on that before we decide. Speak to a doctor or something. But if you think that it’s a good idea, then I’ll support you of course.”

She smiled at him in delight, making him feel even worse.

“Thank you, Matteo. I just really feel like it’s time for us to have a family, you know? It’s our anniversary soon, imagine if we had a little one running around the castle by this time next year. I already have a list of names, of course…”

He tuned her out again and just occasionally nodded his head, hopefully at the right time.

The only name in his head was Aurora’s, so he would just go with whatever Emma suggested.

After finally finishing the last course, he asked for the bill while Emma went to the restroom, and enjoyed the breeze on the terrace, basking in the moment of silence. This was one of the most romantic places in Meran, and if he had only made a different decision, he would sit here with Aurora. And instead of looking at the valley below, he would be too busy looking into her eyes.

Or maybe they would be dead by now, killed either by a war started by King Riccardo or a civil war, like the one that was still raging through the kingdom of Southern Italy. Even though King Riccardo’s troops were long gone from their borders, the people there were still fighting each other, while their King and Queen were forced to hide out in Sardinia, the Queen’s homeland, unable to restore the peace. Whenever it seemed that the tensions were about to ease, some soldiers from Central Italy organised thoroughly thought through attacks and immediately retreated, providing the spark needed to reignite the fire. If he didn’t marry Emma, this could be Northern Italy now.

No, he would do it all over again. Every time he spoke to one of the leaders of the covens in their kingdom, every time they told him about the growth of their population, about the children born recently, he knew he made the right choice. He kept them safe, that was his purpose. What king would he be, if he put his own well-being before the needs of his people?

When Emma returned, they went to his car and drove back to the castle. He’d switched on the radio, so he didn’t have to talk to her anymore.

Vasco Rossi’s signature voice, which sounded like he smoked three packs of cigarettes a day, sang of a place where angels didn’t come to, and Matteo understood what he meant. He was also in a place that felt as far away from paradise as he could imagine.

Qui è logico / Cambiare mille volte idea / Ed è facile / Sentirsi da buttare via (Here it is logical / to change your mind a thousand times / And it’s easy / To feel like nothing). If only he could change his mind, just once, without having to suffer the consequences.  

He kissed Emma’s cheek to wish her good night, before watching her walk into the castle to her room, while he turned around and went to the keep, where Altea was waiting for him, sitting on the bottom of the steps that led into the tower.

“That bad?” she asked and passed him a bottle of limoncello.

“Actually, I haven’t decided yet. Might be good news,” Matteo replied and took a big swig, shuddering when the yellow liquid burned its way down to his stomach.

“I could do with some good news. Shoot,” his sister encouraged him to spit it out.

“Well, it’s about the pregnancy thing…” he started.

“You know,” Altea interrupted him, “for someone who slept around Northern Italy the way you did, it seems weird to me that you have been celibate throughout your marriage…”

“Anyway, Emma suggested IVF. And that just might be my ticket out of any intimate relations with her while still producing an heir. It’s a win-win.”

Altea glanced at her brother. He looked pretty down for someone who just declared a win-win situation, but she knew that nothing short of a miracle would change that, so she just grabbed the bottle out of his hand.

“Win-win. Let’s drink to that.“