Enough
1269 Words
Them being loud and obnoxious works to my advantage for once. I use the opportunity to slip in between the rocks and slide to my cave opening. I hose myself once again with the scent covering spray and continue on into my cave. Fortunately I have flash lights and lanterns stashed all around. I am easily able to illuminate the cave. Throughout the years I was able to sneak things into the cave. Stuff people either left on the curb to be donated or stuff that was intended to be trash. I have a small mattress in the corner with a few ratty old blankets, a fairly new recliner that I had to bring in piece by piece, a small folding card table, and some snacks. I even have a few sets of clothing and shoes just in case.
I notice my run-down cell phone is loosing battery power. I find one of the old booster packs someone threw out and plug in. I have enough service to text but that’s it. Not like the phone is capable of anything else really. It belonged to both of my brothers at one point, and even my sister. They knew I would be the last to get it, so they made sure to abuse it good. My mother mentioned upgrading everyone’s phones once, father agreed to everyone getting a new one but me. He has’t spoken to me since my thirteenth birthday. The day we all found out I had no wolf.
The most I get from him now is a grunt in my general direction. My mother on the other hand, still will talk to me. I think it’s a pity thing. More for herself. A pat on the back to feel good, like she’s doing the moon goddess a favor by acknowledging I exist. My big brothers used to adore me. It’s sad to think about now. I was a princess to them. They loved and protected me. They would spend time with me, indulging me with silly tea parties and board games.
My sister is a different story. I don’t believe she ever loved me. I believe she was jealous of the attention I got. It’s not that she wasn’t loved, with me being the baby I just got a lot of attention. She would always steal my favorite toys. Either throwing them out or giving them to the girls in my class who hated me. Stupid petty things like that. Her first shift on her thirteenth birthday, she tried to kill me. She played it off like it was an accident, but I seen the look in her eyes. She wanted me gone.
I slowly lift my left sleeve, revealing my nasty scar. Slowly tracing my finger tips over it, I vividly remember that horrible night. Cassidy knew some people didn’t have control over their wolf on the first shift. She played my family like a fiddle. Dad told me the scar would go away once I had my wolf. I remember the look in mom’s eyes that night. She knew. She knew her daughter was in full control. She knew she was being lied to. She didn’t care. She couldn’t lose her perfect family. With father being the head warrior we have an image to maintain. We couldn’t let it be known there was trouble in the Ellis home.
A lone tear runs down my cheek. My memories bringing back all the emotions I thought I stashed away. I walk over to my little table, searching for my first aid kit. The cuts on my stomach were bleeding again from all of the running. I carefully remove the bandages that Jeremy so carefully applied. I fight the urge to vomit. Remembering his face, the joy he took in torturing me. Last night he looked like evil incarnate. I have been scared before, but never this scared. It was as if a switch flipped. When he was cutting my skin he was pure evil. The next minute he looked broken and remorseful. He treated my wounds with the utmost care. His eyes looked darker than usual, but I lost a lot of blood and it was dark out.
The switch in personality is what scared me the most. How could a person do that? Was he sick in the head? Other than the obvious. I finish cleaning my cuts and applying ointment to them. I am so sick of all the crap they put me through. I have never said a bad thing or wronged any of them other than by existing. I’ll be damned if I let them continue on their reign of terror. I started digging through my things, I had some money saved up. Working as a coffee barista in the next town over had its perks.
Looking back, I think they allowed me to work so I could save up and run away. It would be perfect for them. They would be rid of me and I them. So what if I don’t finish high school, I’ll find a new coffee shop. I can live in the woods if I have to. I’ve basically been doing that already. I avoid going home as much as I can. If Jeremy isn’t touring me, one of my siblings is. Tonight is the harvest moon, they will be busy celebrating. Nobody will notice that I’m not there. My brothers will lose interest in searching for me soon. Harvest moon is much more important.
I curl up on my bed praying for a nap. I will need all my strength when I run. My alarm goes off at nine. The festival has been going on for a few hours at this point. I should be safe. I load what little gear I have in my bag, clothes, toiletries that I keep here, my small battery pack, and my some of my flashlights. Fortunately I have some painkillers here. I take a few and down my bottle of water. I creep through the rocks toward the entrance. After a few minutes of listening I can hear the festival. I used to love those.
Having decided my route, I head towards the mountains. It’ll take longer time wise but it’s my safest bet. There will be plenty of cracks and crevasses to hide in if they so choose to hunt me down. I feel lighter. This is the best thing I could do for me and I’m proud I finally have the courage to do it. Maybe over time I can heal my scars. The physical and emotional. I don’t want to hate my family, I just want to be left alone.
I exit the forest and enter a clearing. I check my phone, I still have bars. Now is the perfect time. Inhaling a sharp breath, I type out my goodbye to my mom, ‘Mom, I know I am far from perfect and I know I am the family disappointment. It is why I have taken it upon myself to disappear. Tell people I’m at college. You will still have the illusion of your perfect family. I am certain you are aware of the abuse I have been subjected to over the last few years. Wolves have great hearing, I’m sure you heard them sneaking in, cutting my skin, punching, kicking, ripping out my hair. My burn marks on my back, the whip lashings that never healed right. I know you know. Despite all that, I forgive you. I want to start my new life with a clean slate. Don’t bother acting like you’ll miss me. ‘
- Writer
