Her breathing is uneven with short bursts followed by almost frantic panting. I feel so helpless when she is asleep like this and in discomfort. I can do nothing to help alleviate her pain and suffering. It is extremely early in the morning just after the dawn. Pale, greyish light seeps in through the window where the drapes are not quite level. Yesterday was almost peaceful. The queen slept most of the day and when she awoke, in fits and starts, she was mostly lucid. The day before was horrible, even the usually calm Susan lost patience with her. I remain calm and collected. At all times. If I feel agitation coming on, I just remind myself, forcefully, that her suffering is 10 times worse than mine. It is a good discipline. But she is so thin, it breaks my heart to look at her. Only her p
