Mother's Guide

Chapter 3: 30 Minutes and RESPECT - The Daily Habit That Saved Us

After biking, I made a new rule for myself. I call it "30 Minutes". Every day, no matter how busy I am, I will give my son 30 minutes. No phone. No TV. No cooking. Just him. At first, it was hard. I have work. I have chores. I am tired. But I did it. 7:00 PM to 7:30 PM. That is our time. Sometimes we talk. Sometimes we just sit and eat ice cream. Sometimes we watch videos about cars together on YouTube. Sometimes we say nothing and just stay in the same room. What I learned is: RESPECT is not just about saying "po" and "opo".RESPECT means:

R — Really listen, not just hear

E - Enter their world

S - Stop judging

P - Patient, even when you are tired

E - Every day, show up

C - Care about what they care about

T — Talk less, listen more

My son is not "healed" 100%. He still has bad days. He is still quiet sometimes. But now, he knows he can talk to me. He knows I will not shout immediately. He knows I will try to understand. Last week, he said to me, "Ma, thank you for biking with me." I cried. But this time, happy tears. To every mother reading this in the Philippines, or anywhere in the world: If you are going through this, you are not alone. I am here. Try the TALK, UNDERSTAND, RESPECT.

1. TALK — Find time, even 30 minutes

2. UNDERSTAND — Enter their world

3. RESPECT — Listen without judging

It saved my family. I pray it can help you too. This is just the start of our journey. I will continue writing more chapters about what we do every day. If you are a mother who needs someone to talk to, comment here. Or message me. Let's help each other. We are mothers. We are strong. And our children need us to be strong WITH them, not just FOR them. With love, A Mother from Rizal—If you or your child is struggling, please call:NCMH Crisis Hotline: 1553 toll-free or 0919-057-1553 / 0917-899-8727