Missing Death

2 (Nova)

I hate this coffee shop, it’s ugly tan tables with their wobbly legs. These horribly uncomfortable, red leather chairs that my thighs stick to when it’s hot, which is always because they never crank up the air conditioning in this place. The way the walls have holes in the drywall, revealing the wooden beams underneath that are poorly covered by cheap paintings and posters bought to make it look more “aesthetic”. And the people, oh I really hate these people. It’s always filled with collage students cramming in their homework while drinking this horrible coffee. Watching them pull at their hair in stress made me glad that I didn’t apply. I wouldn’t have gotten into any collage anyway, with the grades I had in high school.

And yet even with all the things I hated about this coffee shop, I kept coming back. I was a sucker for watching other people suffer. Their problems seemed so small and yet they acted like it was the end of the world.

I glanced back down at my brand new laptop, where my photo stared back at me. It was surprising how easily I had gotten onto the dark web. I thought for sure that I would have had to hire some computer wiz to do it for me. But it was simple enough that I quickly found the site I was looking for. I typed in all the details it asked for and soon enough I hit post.

Perfect timing, I thought to myself. The waiter made his way over and slid the plastic cup onto the table.

“Nova?” He asks

“Yup, that’s me.” I reply.

“Oh yeah, um, I know,” he stutters out, “you come in here all the time.” He fiddles with the edge of the table, making it rock back and forth on its uneven legs. I gritted my teeth together, trying my hardest not to reach up and steady it.

“I’m Phillip, I usually serve you you’re coffee.. I know the order by heart.” He smiles, “two packets of sugar, one pump of sweet cream.” He recites, looking very proud of himself.

I wanted to tell him that I didn’t really care what his name was or that he had memorized my order, but instead I just gave him a small nod.

“Nice to meet you Phillip.”

He stands there for a moment longer before nudging the coffee closer to me, with a very obviously shaky hand.

“W-well here you go!” He spins on his heel and briskly walks back towards the counter, stumbling along the way. He takes his place behind the counter and I snicker. His face was redder than a tomato.

I stand up and tuck my laptop under my arm and head out the door. I turned the cup over in my hand and I realize he had written his number on the side with a smiley face. Poor guy was so nervous and he hardly said anything. Of course I was never going to call or text him. He would quickly find out that I was a miserable person and just being around me was a letdown. I didn’t smile much and didn’t really like to talk to people.

People made me nervous. I found out from the several foster homes that I had grown up in that being quite and ducking your head got you less attention. In a lot of the families I had been placed with, less attention meant less beatings. I learned very fast how to disappear in corners of the room and become not so noticeable when I felt uncomfortable.

After walking down the sidewalk for several minutes, I turned into an alley behind an apartment building. Making my was to the closest dumpster, I dropped my laptop inside. I stared at it for a moment and sipped my coffee, gagging at the taste. Removing the lid I dumped the contents out onto the laptop. I cringe and dropped the cup next to it. I’d have to buy a new one again. I wasn’t exactly sure how the dark web worked but I made a fake email account and threw the laptop out, just in case.

I take one last glance at the ruined computer and leave the alley, walking back the way I came. The sun was starting to set and I knew I had to be at work soon, so I started the walk to the apartment I shared with my kind of boyfriend, Denny.

We had met at a bar and had one too many drinks. One thing led to another and next thing you know we were back at his place for the night. We had done that several times and soon enough I was spending most of my time at his apartment. He had left an extra key in my wallet and cleared out some space in his closet for the few clothes that I had. He hadn’t actually told me to move in, and I never asked, I had just started crashing at his place after work.

It was a decent arrangement that we had. I had a place to sleep and he got free entry to the club that I worked at. And we both had someone to talk to and to “blow off steam” with. He would never admit it but it was nice feeling like someone actually cared about me. Denny was the guy that asked me about my day when I got home, or would bring me my favorite comfort food when I was feeling down. He was sweet most of the time.

Lately he had been a little distant and I could tell that something was up but decided not to mention it. I wasn’t sure that it was my place considering we weren’t actually dating and I didn’t want to overstep and get kicked out.

I finally made it to our apartment building and pushed my way through the main entrance. The elevator was out of order as usual so I began the long trek up the stairs to the 6th floor. When I made it up I dug my key out of my wallet and shoved it into the lock, twisting back and forth before I heard the click. Like many things in this building, the lock on our door was also broken and you had to jiggle it to get it to unlock.

I pushed the door open, throwing my stuff onto the couch. Denny’s apartment was super small but we made it work. There was minimal furniture in the house so that we could actually have room to move around. But even with the singular couch and coffee table, it was still crowded.

I made my way into the bathroom and started to get ready. I took a second to look at myself in the mirror. I wasn’t the prettiest person on the planet by far, but I had to admit when I put effort into it, I actually looked semi-decent. I put on light makeup that made my emerald green eyes pop and lightly curled my red hair. I was around 5’4 in height and a little on the thicker side. I wasn’t overweight but there was more than a little to love on my chest and thighs. I turned my body to take a glance at my butt, yeah that wasn’t too bad either. I had the perfect figure for the club I worked at, or so the boss tells me.

It wasn’t necessarily a strip club, there were dancers and the waitresses uniforms didn’t leave much to the imagination, but none of the staff were required to remove any clothing. We just served drinks and smiled.

One of the main appeals to the club is we had costume days, once a week we would pick a day and make it a theme. Todays theme was Maid Monday. All the waitresses would wear a skimpy maid outfit and carry around little feather dusters. I knew that the men tonight would be tipping extra. They loved Maid Monday.

I finished up my makeup and went to say a quick goodby to Denny. Knowing him he would probably be at the club later but I wanted to see him. I poked my head into the room.

“Hey Denny I’m headed-“

My words caught in my throat and my heart dropped. Denny was laying in bed, a look of euphoria on his face while some blonde bounced up and down on him.

“Nova!” He shouts at me. I expected him to look guilty or at least apologize, but instead he had an annoyed look on his face.

“Uh, close the door!” The girl on top of him scoffs.

“S-sorry,” I stuttered, quickly closing the door. I felt tears line my eyes and sniffled. My heart felt like someone had chipped yet another piece off of it.

I was a fool to think that he cared for me.

Snatching my stuff off the couch, I wiped my face and put up a stone wall, blocking any emotion from leaking through. I couldn’t break down right now, I needed to get to work.