When Meldei was younger her father often brought home children picture books whenever there was a good catch at the river. Growing up in a fishermen's family meant he could only stay in middle school for so long before obligations called him after his father's footsteps to the sea.
But her father loved to learn. He'd hardly missed the weekends by coming home early—before dusk—and they'd eat in the backyard and the chickens would crowd their feet for food. Then, he'd sit Meldei on his strong laps and listen as she read aloud.
She knew her father did not understand one English word, but he was adamant on repeating the one that stood out to him most, and Meldei would question him of its meaning the next day. Sometimes, when he couldn't remember, she would teach him to write.
All of which, while her mother sat watching with laughter brimming her face.
A silhouette loomed over Meldei. "What are you reading?"
Meldei blinked—and the world zoomed in again with its noises. She quickly looked up, shutting the book she'd been staring at.
Standing behind her was their homeroom teacher, Mrs, Bopha, with her arms crossed.
"Just—a storybook," Meldei said, smiling apologetically. She kept it away. "I finished copying." She indicated in her notebook.
Bopha traced a well-manicured finger along the page. "Your handwriting improved," she said later, urging the book toward Meldei. "With this, you'll get full marks on the national test next year. Don't let it change."
She purely thought her writing was originally neat, but that didn't deter Bopha's constant reminders that one time, she nearly failed when they drowned out her ideas for an essay exam.
Meldei was spared from answering when three girls filed into the class, taking their teacher's attention.
"It was really the traffic, I swear," pleaded the round girl in the middle, Pheaktra. Her friends standing at the board agreed, but Bopha's stern face hardly changed.
"Meldei!" Pheaktra suddenly called, startling her. "You do believe us, right? You know how bad that one road can get."
"Really?" said Bopha.
"Uh—yes." Meldei sat higher. "There's a sewage construction recently that starts very early in the morning." It was true, though she heard Pheaktra already transferred her house away from there.
Pheaktra let out a rueful smile when their teacher finally let them sit. They breezed past Meldei, and Pheaktra blew her a kiss. I'll stop next time, she mouthed, winking.
Meldei sniggered. She turned to see if Nika saw the exchange but instead found her with her face propped against an arm, expression somehow a little dark. She was scribbling something repeatedly on the desk. Beside her, her seatmate Malis was sitting on the other edge of the bench.
Something wasn't right.
"Yey," she whispered. Nika looked up, but as soon as Meldei's eyes flickered to the girl beside her, she frowned and shook her head and pretty much ignored her for the rest of class.
______.______
"It's nothing," Nika said when Meldei finally asked her after lunch.
Meldei stood up from the stump, taking her bag along. "How can two people not talk to each other over nothing?" she said. "Tell me."
Nika was washing her hands at the lake. From a distance, it looked like she was another water lily adrift near the bank, among many others.
A pause ran between them. Then Nika said, "It's stupid. Just forget about it."
Meldei was least convinced. "Can you forget?"
Nika's face settled to a straight line when she returned, and she picked up all the used tissues. "Aren't I forgetful?"
"Not so much to forget to lock your door." Meldei handed her a plastic bag. "For which I'm glad."
"I wouldn't be standing here now otherwise."
Whatever it was that happened, it was clear she wouldn't be getting it out of her too easily. But Nika's personality was like a poison bomb that grew with time. The longer she held the poison in, the deadlier the outburst.
After cleaning up, they walked back toward the school. The sky was clear, but Meldei barely felt the heat with the winds constantly blowing at her baby hairs like someone had hung ice in front of a fan.
When she was small and there were strong winds, she'd closed her eyes and think she was flying. Her father had taught her the trick.
"How are you not cold?" Nika grunted beside her. She was shoving her arms through a big, thick jacket.
"How are you cold?" Meldei instead said. "Isn't Mondolkiri always like this? Even cooler?" Nika was from there. Her family had tended to hectometers of coffee plantations for a private company for generations.
"Just know I'm glad to be out of it early," Nika said.
"Well, you're not getting out of this one." She looked at her. "If you won't speak, then I'll just ask Malis what's wrong."
Nika went quiet for a moment. Meldei kept her gaze on her, mindful of the ground, waiting. The dead skeleton trees passed them by.
Their pace slowed, but Nika's expression changed quickly.
"I'm always the one who's wrong," she finally said. "When I do something and she doesn't like it, I'm wrong. But when I get offended, apparently it's also my fault for expecting too much."
Meldei sought her downcast face. "What do you mean, expecting too much?"
Nika shrugged—and seemed to struggle with what to say until she settled with: "She said she'd come to hang out at my house after school. I was excited. We rarely have the chance. I clean the whole place and baked tons of her favorite snacks. Then I called to ask where she was, but then she told me she couldn't come. She was invited to meet some—teacher because she didn't think her tutor was right for her." Nika swung the trash bag idly. "Then, when I called a few hours later, she said she was tired. I was waiting the whole time. I even canceled my own class thinking we could hang out."
"She didn't go the next day?" Meldei asked. They were approaching the gate ahead.
"Didn't even mention it yesterday." Nika shrugged again, but her face held the edge from that morning. "Guess I was expecting too much. Or I'm just not that important."
She nudged her. "Don't say that."
"It's got to be one of them," Nika said.
Nika got to know Malis way earlier back, though it still seemed like years of friendship still couldn't manage to bridge their differences. Nika was earnest but she had clear priorities for her friends whereas Malis was earnest...about other things entirely. Like keeping an iron hold on being among the tops of the class.
An uneasy wave came over Meldei as they crossed over the gate. She swiftly shut off the entrance. There was a one-story building set directly in front of the gate, so it granted them a sort of privacy.
Meldei didn't walk on yet. "She's not, I don't know, jealous or anything like that right?" she said. "Seeing that you're hanging out with me most of the time now."
"She's the one who wants to study grammar on lunch break," Nika stated. "I'm not smart, but I need some rest too."
If she said so.
She sighed. "Malis is just being Malis," she said, lightly. "You can't let something that won't change keep upsetting you over and over."
"I had hope," said Nika, after a pause. She wasn't facing her now. "I knew her for so many years, but it's like—sometimes—her eyes would just go over me. Don't get me wrong. I am thankful for what she did for me, but—" Her voice broke. Meldei saw her swallow. "I would've let it go for one apology. Just one."
Meldei squeezed her shoulder. "I'll talk to her," she said, but Nika shook her head.
She swiped her eyes. "Never mind." The trash bag was still dangling from her wrist. In one swift motion, she wriggled it through her hand and tossed it through the building's window.
"I hope that's where your frustration just went," Meldei said as positively as she could. She handed her new tissues. "Besides, it's not all a bad thing that Malis didn't go to your house." She patted her belly, grinning. "The snacks you baked can come in here."
Nika snorted, still wiping her face. When she finally turned her eyes were a bit red, but they blended with her complexion. "I baked brownies," she said. "Last time I made it, you said they look like—"
"Don't say it!" She cleared her throat. "I love every snack, and therefore wouldn't discriminate their appearances."
"Fool." But Nika was beginning to smile. Suddenly, she stepped closer and threw her arms around her. Her hair smelled like Sunsilk shampoo.
Her voice was laced with feeling as she said, "I knew Malis first, but I've always felt like you knew me first. Yey. I'll never forget what you did for my birthday."
Meldei hugged her back, smiling. "I'm just happy that we can stay together even during English shifts."
"Three hundred dollars is still a lot." Nika stepped back. "I know how your mom is also struggling. I could've just enrolled when my family has enough for me."
"It's a gift. Just accept it." She made her voice stern. "And don't even think of paying it back. It's a bad omen."
Nika smiled, her eyes welling. So Meldei said before they both ended up crying, "Your hair looks like wild grass. Do something about it."
"The proper term is hay—mind you."
As Meldei reached for her own hair, intending to lose the bun, her stomach froze. She felt around her head once more, but her fingers touched nothing cold and solid.
She rummaged her bag. "Yey, did you see my—" She gasped. "Oh no."
She rushed to the building's window and attempted to look through. But the building blocked out the sun and it was too dim inside with only one window.
"What?" Nika came beside her.
She buried her face in her hands. "The jade hair stick was in that trash bag. I forgot to take it out."