A Diamond Heart

Episode 19

A

DIAMOND

HEART

Episode 19

~Playlist for this chapter is 'Anyone who loves me - Charlotte Cardin' ?? do enjoy

Micaela's POV

Oh my God, I kissed him, I kissed Fernando Perez my long-time crush. The only guy I've ever loved, the only guy I caused to be stone-cold to women up till date, I kissed him. This is so surreal! What the hell did I just do?

My hands were trembling on the steering wheel of my car as I drove to no destination in particular. I can't believe I wasn't thinking straight when I stole a kiss from him. I'm such a heartless b***h! Wasn't it enough I ruined his life while he was just a teenager and he's still trying to get over his past and now I had to make him remember all of it again? What kind of lady am I? God knows I only went there to show my gratitude for covering me up in front of my friends and not to kiss him. I swear I didn't mean to kiss him, I was only moved by emotions.

*A Few Hours Earlier*

"I see you later found my friend yesterday. Tell us where you found her and what exactly she was doing when you found her because yesterday wasn't the first time she's disappeared on us" Sabrina said and the whole room went silent.

My palms were getting sweaty where I was standing, I knew this was the end of me if Fernando should tell them the truth. They'll start seeing me as a selfish friend who doesn't care about her friend's feelings. "Fernando! We're waiting for you!" Sabrina half-yells startling me.

I was at the brim of tears as I locked my gaze with Fernando. A prop for my faint heart is all I needed right now, I can't stand this betrayal. He rose from his seated position and adjusted the chair back. His hands were in his pocket and his gaze narrowed to Sabrina. This was it, he was going to tell them everything.

But then the next few words that came out of his mouth were "You know, you ladies generally are full of dramas which is why I don't like spending time with you all. I beg to take my leave, I have important matters to attend to".

My head jerks up and I gazed at him, as he gave a slight bow and began walking to the door.

What?! I almost exclaimed aloud. Did he just ignore Sabrina's question?

"What do you even mean we ladies are full of dramas? I just asked you a question and you're walking out on me?!" Sabrina snapped with her hands on her hips. Good question Sabrina, good question, I applauded inwardly.

"Young lady, I don't have time for long conversations. If you want to know where I found her, you should ask her yourself, I have business matters to attend to which gives me more money than a conversation like this. If you'd excuse me, I'm leaving" Fernando retorted and walks out on us.

The three of us gasp at his arrogance but then a thought hits me, Fernando was ignoring Sabrina's question for my sake. He doesn't want to reveal my deep secret if not I'll be screwed. Could my intuition be right, was Fernando protecting me?

"Ji-hye" his voice rang in the room and all our gaze was distracted to the door. This was it, he changed his mind, he is going to tell my friends all about last night. "I'm sorry but you have to help me with my breakfast again, don't worry, I'll make it up to you" he continues and winked at her and I gape at the door dumbfounded.

He didn't betray me like I thought he would, he left my house without even saying goodbye to me. I was sad he left without talking to me, but you know what though? I was happy deep down that he kept my little secret or maybe big secret whatever you want to call it.

A huge sigh of relief escapes my mouth unconsciously causing Sabrina to glance back at me. "What?" I asked with a shrug and she frowns at me.

"Seriously babe, you couldn't even stop him from walking out on us just like that?" she asks in a hysterical tone with her arms folded and placed on her chest, while all I did was shrug in response. "Where the hell did you say you knew such an arrogant jerk from again?" she continues and Kim snickered.

"Sabrina, I've told you before that he is my high school friend. How many times do you want me to say it? You know what, I'm so hungry right now, I don't know about you ladies" I replied in a bored tone and took a sit on one of the dining chairs.

"I think my stomach just rumbles now that you mentioned it. Ji-hye, can I share that abandoned breakfast with you?" Kim giggled and joined me in the dining.

"Of course, I'll gladly share with you, I can't eat the whole meal anyways when I still have mine intact in the kitchen" Ji-hye giggles and took a few steps to the table and started serving Kim out of Fernando's breakfast.

I gaze up at Sabrina who was staring at us with a wide gaze. "Sabrina, are you not going...."

"Join you ladies?" she half-chuckles cutting me off and I raised a brow at her. "You ladies are something, especially you Micaela. I was worried sick over you last night only for me to come here this morning seeing you healthy and sound without a scratch and when I asked for an explanation on your hideout you choose to bullshit me, isn't it?".

"Sabrina c'mon, don't be...."

"It's fine, I guess I'm the one pushing this friendship thing, it's time for me to face reality and know you don't value my friendship with you like I value yours" she cuts in and then turnaround and walks away.

Kim and I shared a glance at each other and I stood up to go after Sabrina. I think she is taking this whole thing so seriously. "Sabrina please wait up" I called after her but she turns deaf ears to me. "Sabrina I'm talking to you, please wait!"

"What for? To bullshit me more?" she halted glaring up at me.

"Oh Sabrina dear, you're taking all this too serious, don't you think so?".

"Really? I can't believe my ears! You know what, just let me leave so I won't bother asking serious questions and so you can have your peace!" She latched back at me and turnaround to leave.

I held her wrist and she glance down at my hand. "Please don't leave. I'm sorry if I said something bad to you, but trust me it wasn't my intention to deliberately offend you. You do know how much I value your friendship and that of Kim's, girls I've been my sisters ever since I got to know you two. I can't possibly trade your friendships for anything".

"But why then do you make me feel like you don't value it? I just hate when you disappear on us without even giving us a clue on where to find you should incase god-forbid something terrible happens. It gives me chills whenever you do that, is there something going on in your life that I don't know of?".

Sabrina's gaze was dipped into mine and my eyes were almost betraying me right now. I blinked away quickly before I'll give in to her beautiful puppy eyes and start spilling out all I'd been hiding concerning my suicidal thoughts. I can't tell her all about that because a thousand questions will come up with the reason behind why I want to end my own life. Nothing stops me from telling her or Kim, but I don't trust them enough to keep such a big secret and I don't want them to judge me now.

"Sabrina, you know me too well, if I'm hiding anything I'm sure by now you would have figured it out already. Stop thinking too much about me, I'm fine, is just that sometimes I just need space to clear my head on some things. And also, I get inspiration more when I'm in my space. So, is nothing serious to worry about, I'm fine, okay?".

"I hope you're telling me the truth, babe, I don't want to lose you," she said sweetly and entwined our hands.

I pulled her into a hug and whispered, "You're not losing me, dearest".

"I'm going to finish up all the food on this table if one more minute passes and you two are not here!" Kim hollers from the dining room startling both of us apart. We giggled and shook our heads amusingly.

"You're such a foodie but yet you are so skinny!" Sabrina yells back and we burst into laughter and made our way back to the dining room.

"Whatever!" Kim retorts and a smile spread on my face. I'm happy that we are over the misunderstanding.

After having breakfast with my friends, an hour later I was left alone with my thoughts on how to show my gratitude to Fernando for saving me. I could remember before Ji-hye invited both of us for breakfast earlier on he made mentioned meeting with me again. I'm very sure he wants to know why I wanted to take my own life yesterday. Am I ready to tell him the truth? Regardless, I'll meet with him, perhaps when we meet then I'll use that opportunity to say thank you to him for all he'd done since he got here.

Sadness prevailed in my mood as I flashback to our first meeting at the bar to the elevator where we got stuck and how helped me save face from my ex-colleagues. And the most memorable moment of it all that will stick to me for the rest of my life was when he saved my life yesterday.

While I was still brooding over everything that has happened, a text message notification popped up on my iPhone and I slide the locks open and clicked on the message. It was an unknown number which I had a missed call from yesterday but didn't return the calls when I saw it today.

The text message reads, "Hey Micaela, I can't meet up with you as I had said earlier, I'm going back to Madrid today in two hours, I hope you take care of yourself. Goodbye. Fernando". He is leaving? A gasp escapes my mouth and my eyes were clouded with tears. Fernando was leaving me here in this country, more or less he is leaving me in my sad world again. I thought he was here to stay? Isn't that what he had promised last night?

When I blinked my eyes, tears were rolling down my cheeks uncontrollably. No matter what it takes I have to see him before he leaves even if is for the last time. I dried up my tears and got myself ready to see him.

*NOW*

Tears blurred my vision and I wished I hadn't kissed him. Fernando will never forgive me for kissing him without his permission. Was it even necessary for me to kiss him all in the name of gratitude? I've not settled the score with him of years ago but yet I created another. Why is my life such a complicated one?

I declined the thought of stopping the car and giving myself a break. I was so opaque with my thoughts. When I blinked my eyes to get a clearer view of the road the first thing I saw was a young guy crossing the road. "Oh my God!" I screeched and maneuver the steering wheel until the car came to an abrupt stop at the sideway of the road. My chest rose and fell heavily in shock.

I can't believe I almost ran someone over, that would have meant a life jail sentence. What is wrong with me?