The Girl Who Lived

A new home, A new family.

We got to our destination after sitting in awkward silence for 30 minutes. 

I was put into another foster home. This home was bad, it's hard to believe but it was worse than the first. I never thought that my life could get worse, I just thought that after running away it would get better. 

I knew that if I ran again I would just end up in another crappy foster home, so I stayed. I didn’t know why I always got crappy foster homes, but I did. Maybe there aren’t any good ones. The first couple of weeks were fine, but after that things started to go downhill. There were rules in place like don’t sit on the white couch, and don’t talk to anyone after 5 pm. I didn’t understand why anyone would put these rules in place. A month after I was there, I was abused by an older brother who was 18, a man who was 5 years older than me. I didn’t understand why men always wanted my body. I was so confused. After he stuck his tongue down my throat I knew I had to do something. I figured out that men don’t just want my body they want the body of younger girls, they don’t care who the person is. I tried to tell and I tried to get help but, when I told his parents what was going on they didn’t believe me, why would they? They were this selfish arrogant family who wouldn't care if I died or if I was alive! As long as they got their damned check from the system! It was always money money money for them! After he stuck his tongue down my throat again I gave up. I didn’t want to just give up, but there was nothing else I could do. 

He would seek me out after school, before school, really whenever he could. I guess he figured if he could do this no one would really care, he was older and I was just the trouble girl. No one cared. He would start to bring his friends over and they would tie me up and force me to do things I really didn’t want to do. Every time I tried to fight back, he would slap me and tell me to shut up no one would ever care. I didn’t think that was true until; his parents walked in on us, and his father praised him for what he was doing to me.

After people at school found out about my past, and what was going on at home, I didn’t know what to do. Every boy at the school started to ask me for favors. I got really depressed. I wanted to end it all, I wanted to die. I thought no one on this planet would understand, or help me. That's when I met a friend, she went through the same stuff I did, I thought I could trust her. We were friends for a bit before she invited me over, I didn’t know why. Then when she invited me over, her parents and brother wanted me to do things. Things I didn’t want to do so of course, I ran out of their house. I ran back to the house I was living in, I packed a bag and left. I didn’t want to run again I thought it was stupid that I felt like I had to.  So I did.