Twisted Choice

George

I have been awake for hours, staring at the same blue curtains that drape around my bed. The sun is just starting to rise over the dark green fields out the window on my right, the silence of my room is deafening, no roomates to bother me, and no machines to disturb the peace. I was grateful at first for the private room, to not have some strangers farting or moaning through the night, to avoid the constant interuptions of nurses checking patience vitals and the constant whispers of conversations at all hours of the day. But now, now the quiet is all I have for company, I don't want to pick up my phone, because everyone either has questions or symathies. The only one who doesn't is Mia but that is only because she knows everything already, however I can't disturb her as she's home with Daisy and Arthur, it's their last night at home before they head to their fathers for the longest stay they've ever had, and the last thing I want to do is wake them up at this time in the morning. Jessica is still on shift, but she's coming to the end and will have stacks of patience to pass over to the day staff and it wouldn't be fair or right to cause her to finish late not after how amazing she has been to me. She has not only been my nurse, but my friend and my confidant as well.

I lay still in this bed watching the sun rise higher and higher into the sky. Waiting for my body to heal with every passing minute, waiting for the police to return to tell me they've caught my attacker but neither happens. There's no CCTV, no witnesses, no suspects, no hope. That is why I must go find him, he will see me and when he does I will see him, I can only hope I am fast enough and clever enough to take him down, when I do.

The door opens slowly distracting me from my thoughts, I can't see who it is for the blue curtains pulled closed around my bed. Even though theyre completely useless in this private room, I like them closed, makes me feel protected.

'Hello?' A quiet voice calls, its a familiar voice, but no one I've heard for a while.

'George? Is that you?' I call back, not so quietly. He pulls back the curtain revealing himself.

'Hey I heard what happened, I would of come sooner but... well work.' He trails off, I know the answer its always work, he is the biggest workaholic I know. Work always came first with him, he said he wanted to build us a better, safer future. Well that didn't really work out so well did it?

'How are you feeling? Healing up okay?' He asks casually as if he doesn't know the severity of what happened. He's making me mardy, I want to be mad at him but he's been nice.

'How do you think I'm doing? I was stabbed and r***d for f**k sake.' That came out a little too harsh.

'Okay, okay I was only asking.' He says taking a seat in the chair next to me.

'Sorry george, its just been a rough week, what brings you here?' I ask trying to sound a little less annoyed at him now.

'I just wanted to know what you were telling the kids, so were on the same page.'

'You could of called to ask me that.' I state getting more frustrated again.

'I tried, you haven't been answering my calls or messages.' he states matter of fact.

'I haven't been using my phone much.'

'Well that's a first, and if you haven't been using it, how did you expect me to call?' he's not wrong but he's pissing me off.

'Have you just come here to argue? Because if so, you can just leave.' He's really grating on me now.

'I told you, I wanted to know what you're telling the kids, so I don't put my foot in it with them.' I suppose he is here trying to do right by the kids, how can I be angry at him for that?

'I haven't told them anything yet, Mia told them I've had an accident and don't want to see them until im feeling better as I don't want to upset them, but I'm sure they've heard roomers as it seems everyone knows what happened, except for me!' I ramble on at him, hardly taking a breath.

'What do you mean except you?' He questions budging now to the edge of the chair.

'I mean I don't remember anything after I left the bar, someone spiked my drink' I explain.

'Someone spiked you? Who did you speak to? What bar were you in? What were you wearing?' He questions without taking a beat.

'What do you mean what was I wearing?' Now I'm annoyed he's going to resite my own rules to me.

'There your rules Lucy, never leave your drink uncovered, never go anywhere alone, jot down any taxi registration plate that you get into and never draw too much attention to yourself.' he's annoyed now, he knows I broke my own rules and not just one but most of them.

'Show me!' he expclaims, knowing fine well that Mia would of insisted on pictures before heading out. I hate that he knows me so well. I pass him my phone gallery opened to a picture of me Mia and Sasha, all dressed up ready for a night on the town. My far too short bay pink dress centre stage on the photo, my long brunette curls laying over my bare shoulders overing the tiny spaghetti straps that held the whole thing up. His face darkens, he's annoyed now, annoyed that I put myself in danger after all my controlling rules and demands on others, that I of all people would break them.

'Its your fault' he says matter of fact. A chill washes over me, he's said what no one else dared that its my fault. That because of what I wore I was asking for trouble, and that's exactly what I got.

'Thats not fair' I reply quietly barely able to defend myself.

'No? You would never of gone out in anything like that if you had still been with me. You hated how controlling I was but I was only trying to protect you, trying to protect you from things like this. You left me because you thought you knew best, and this just proves how much you need me.' now I'm furious, I hated how controlling he was because he isn't always right, it was sufocating, he was suffocating.

'A women should be able to walk the streets in whatever she sees fit without fear of a man taking advantage, we shouldn't have to cower and hide from the world or dim our light to stop the evil from finding us. Monsters are the ones with the problem, and men like you that tell women like me that this attack is all my fault, when its not, the only person who is to blame is the man who did the attacking, no one else, and certainly not me!' Even im starting to believe the words pouring out of my mouth now.

'You're wrong Lucy, you need me, you need me to show you how scary the world is, to show you what real protection looks like. That's all I ever want to do is to protect you and our family.' he's standing now, frustrated that I wont agree with him.

'I don't need you to show me, I know how scary it can be, and I dont need you to protect me, I can protect myself.' I exclaim with more confidence now, pushing myself up from the bed so we are face to face.

'You can't even protect yourself from me right now' he hisses through gritted teeth, as he grabs my wrist, squeezing his hand tightly round it, waiting for me to break my gaze on him or to step back and cower but I refuse standing strong against him. Proving my point even if he breaks my wrist.