The Shadows Within Me

⚜️ Chapter 2⚜️

Okay. I have the impression that there are some unexplained things, so let me rectify that.

The continent of Theóus is divided into seven kingdoms. Each kingdom is named after the god/goddess that took up residence in their lands during the celestial war, 776 years ago. It is said that when the gods first stepped onto the land of each kingdom, that kingdom was given unprecedented powers: Aure (Air Kingdom), Dionysus (Nature Kingdom), Hephaestus (Fire Kingdom), Achelous (Water Kingdom), Panacea (Medicine and Healing Kingdom), Astraeus (Night Kingdom) and Lampetia (Day Kingdom). I guess you can work it out yourself.

Humans and fairies lived in harmony back then. There was no division of power: royalty and commoners. But when the heavenly war was over, the gods had to leave, and with their departure, that meant the power of the earth would also go. So they appointed a king/queen for each kingdom and gave them part of their powers to make the land prosper. Obviously the chosen rulers were those who already had magic: the fairies. But the gods were clever. For them to be able to pass on the powers, from generation to generation, and for humans and fairies to continue to live in harmony as before, kings and queens must marry humans. In this way, the kingdoms will prosper and the humans wouldn't feel left out in ruling the continent.

Achelous is one of the kingdoms. It received the name of the god of waters. The kingdom is known for its vastness of rich lakes and rivers. As time passed, three descendants of the first king and queen ruled over the kingdom. The power to rule was passed down from parents to children. They had the power of a fairy, with a tiny sliver of that of a deity, but the humanity of a human. However, they forgot the most crucial rule in ruling: Humans and fairies must live and rule in harmony! The first two kings followed the rules. But the third, the last King Maven Adalric, did not.

Although he married a mortal woman and gave the kingdom heirs to maintain the image of a just king, it was he who enslaved the people and brought to life the game of power: royalty and commoners. Under his rule, the humans who held the name of Lords, Dukes, etc., lost their voice in the management of the kingdom. Other kingdoms followed suit. However, I have heard of some that still follow the old and most important rule.

Even now, under the rule of the new and fourth king, Darius Adalric, the kingdom is following the same steps it did under King Maven. But now, after 8 years of ruling, the king of Achelous needs a queen. And even he can't deny that for ruling he needs to have a human wife. Otherwise, how is he going to keep pretence?

But does it really have to be me?

I coughed on the tea I was sipping as Sir Rios says the words. I look at the four men as if they lost their minds. And then I turned my head to the other couch and look at each person. Darwin and Archie are staring at each other with widened eyes, surprise and incredulity written all over them. But what gains my attention is aunt Clarissa. She has a delighted expression on her face.

Of course she would be delighted! A niece of hers on the throne that she could play marionettes with? Why not?

I clear my throat as I place the tea cup on the table and look at the Royal Adviser and prince Killian.

"And what gave you the impression that I would be perfect?", I ask slowly.

The prince looks smug as he gazes me up and down. "Well, for starters, you are a sight to look at. I'm sure my brother would love to have you at his side."

He smiles at me like he just complimented me when he did the opposite. I smile back, though, because two can play this game.

"And, just out of curiosity, what would I do once I become queen?", I ask.

I feel the eyes of everyone on us and a pair of eyes, especially, are throwing daggers at me. Aunt Clarissa, that's for sure. But she knows she can't say anything.

"Well, once you are the queen you'll have a lot of work, I won't lie", he begins.

"Like what?". I ask sweetly.

"Like preparing parties, that would be a full time job. You will have to meet every one of the Royalty and then there is the problem of the heirs...", he begins to enumerate the things I would do.

But I stopped listening at 'preparing parties' and 'heirs'. I hate parties. And they expect me to prepare and attend them? And this is supposed to be the proposal, when did he get the impression that I wanted to marry let alone pop the king some children out of me? Another thing is nagging at the back of my mind.

"Will I be allowed to take part at the council meetings?", I interrupt him.

He looks at me surprised as if no one ever interrupted him. I smile at him again to ease him a little.

"Council meetings? To attend, maybe, but not to take part in. And, of course, there would be meetings in the throne room with commoners and Royalty alike, where the king would attend to their needs, but you will just be there to give them hope", he says.

Exactly what I thought.

"So let me see if I understood correctly", I hold up a pointing finger to keep them silent as I get up from the grandpa chair and begin to pace on the floor as I start to enumerate. "I marry the king, I become queen, I will have everything I'll ever want and, in return, I will be expected to give him and the kingdom heirs, to hold and attend parties, to keep my mouth shut and never speak back, keep my head high, but have little power over anything in my life, and stand beside the king as equals but nothing more than a little puppet whose actions are not its own! You expect me to be a trinket, looked and admired, but without a say of where I want to be sat!", my voice raises with every word escaping my mouth and my back straightens as I turn to face them with a hard glare.

The four of them look taken aback and the prince turns his gaze at my aunt as if asking something. I gaze at her too. She seems flustered, from second-hand embarrassment or suppressed anger at her niece's boldness, I don't know.

"Don't look at her. I think this is a choice that I have to take, for it is something concerning my life", I say a little composed.

"You're right. It is your choice", he turns his attention to me with a conciliatory expression on his face as if he is talking to a child who is about to scream for the injustice of not having any candies before diner. "But before you make it, think of what you and your family would gain from accepting this proposal.".

"And what would that be?", I challenge him.

He and Sir Rios raise from their seated position and take a few steps away from the couch, the guards behind them with their hands on their swords and hard glares directed at me. Archie and Darwin come to stand on either side of mine, offering their support on my choice. Aunt Clarissa stands next to the couch watching this unfold.

"Your mother made a promise-", he starts.

"In the name of un unborn baby, yet another moment when an important decision was taken from me", I interrupt him through clenched teeth. At this point I'm shivering from the anger I try to suppress and in the back of my mind flags of warning flare. I should heed them, because the prickling in my fingers becomes more evident by the moment, but I'm too worked up to care.

"-in your name, that's true, but she did it with you in mind. This shows how much she cared", he continues.

"If caring is a new way to say loath, then yeah, she did care for me", I roll my eyes.

"I'm not pretending to know what made you think that your mother hated you, but I can voice that she did care", he frowns as if willing to make me understand.

"We're getting off topic here", I say, not in the mood to keep a conversation about the false love of a mother, especially with someone so arrogant.

He nods. "Your mother made a promise and, when the council demanded that the king has a queen, the Queen Mother came and told us about you. If you look at that from our point of view, this is a way to put your mother's promise in practice. You and your family will be rewarded. If you do not accept, you will still have to come to live in the castle, but as a servant."

"Rewarded", I repeat. "As in with gold?"

"Yes, and any other necessary things", he says anonymously as he looks briefly from the corners of his eye to aunt Clarissa. She avoids his gaze.

I frown at the exchange. For the human eye it couldn't even have been perceived. But I learned to pay attention to every movement of a person and how to read them. If I didn't know any better I would say that they have a secret between them.

"You called it a proposal", says Archie from my left. "Why is it delivered by you and not the king himself?"

"Because the king has a kingdom to rule, boy", Sir Rios replies.

"And is the kingdom more important in this moment than coming to see your supposed future bride?" asks Darwin ironically.

Sir Rios seems at a loss of words, but it doesn't matter. Being it the king himself or those fools to extend the proposal, my answer would be the same.

"My answer remains-", I am interrupted, and I have to say that it is annoying and I kind of understand how the prince felt when I did it.

"Give us a few days, your Highness", aunt Clarissa comes to stand between us and gazes at me with a look that says 'keep quiet'. "I will speak to her and make her see reason-"

"Aunt-"

"-and we will notify you when she makes the decision." She gives me another hard glare before returning to the prince.

Prince Killian looks between us and after a few moments, he nods. "We will wait for your letter."

Aunt Clarissa bows lowly as they turn and leave. After the sound of their footsteps disappeared, aunt Clarissa turns around and, faster than I can perceive, she strikes me on the cheek. My hand flies up to hold my cheek and Darwin catches me as I sway on my feet.

"Mother!", I hear Archie shout.

"You disrespectful little wench!", she starts to scream as the anger she kept in check all this time finally takes over her actions. "How dare you speak this way to the prince? Do you know how hard it was to even get him here to see you?"

"So it was you", I let out as I turn to face her with tears gathering in my eyes and a stinging cheek. "I knew that I didn't imagine the looks that passed between you."

"Yes, it was me. I reminded the queen of the promise your stupid mother made all these years ago. I spent months gaining her trust and vouching for you! And this is how you repay me? Speaking in such a manner with the king's brother?!", she shouts again.

"Ma, why would you do that?", asks Archie with a pained expression.

"So she can wash her hands of me as quickly as possible", I conclude slowly.

I knew she hated me and my presence in this house, but to go to such extremes to get me out? I never knew that my heart could take another painful blow, but right here and now, my heart beats slower than before.

"Don't say that", Darwin warns me, always the twin blind at his mother's actions.

"You becoming queen would be beneficial for all of us", aunt Clarissa states more calmly with her chin up in stubbornness, but not denying my words.

"So you are practically selling me", I say.

"Don't be stupid", she avoids my gaze.

"The answer is no", and with that I turn on my heels and start for the door.

"Do you want us to fall? Because we will if you don't accept."

Those words stop me in my trail. I turn around and stare hard at her. "What do you mean?"

She fumbles with the flannel on her gown's sleeves. "Why would I tell you? It wouldn't make you change your mind, would it?"

I look away from her for a second to keep my anger in check. "You started talking, better keep on."

"Fine", she looks nonchalantly at me, determination in her eyes. "After you uncle died", she trails off as if pained by the thought and looks at her sons before continuing, "he left us with a few debts. I had to pay them from the vault. As it is, we are short on money."

As if this is enough explanation.

"Why didn't you say anything, mother?", Archie asks.

"What could you have done?"

"I am the next lord of this land, I would have found something. We would have done something", he retorts irritated. "It doesn't mean you have to literally sell Ria to gain back what we lost."

"You don't understand-"

"Then tell me!", he shouts. "Explain to me and maybe then I will understand."

"We didn't pay the servants full salary in months",she replies just as enraged.

"Yet another thing you kept from me", he ponts a finger at her.

"If she marries the king", she starts, "we will have enough to keep us hundreds of years, Archie. Our servants will be paid monthly the right amount, the animals will be fed regularly and our - your - lands and people will be taken care of. We will rise from this dirt and shame."

There are a few moments of silence in which Archie looks at his mother as if he doesn't know her. I take the time to think about what she said and there must be something in my eyes that gives my thoughts away, because Darwin looks at me.

"Don't even think about it", he warns me. "You're not going to sell yourself to anyone, king or not."

I take him in, wondering when had the little squeaky boy grown so fast. His curly brown hair is the same as Archie's and while his eyes are brown, Darwin's are blue, like uncle Lewis'. There is the subtle shadow of a beard on his jawline and cheeks, while Archie is clean shaven. They might be twins, but they couldn't be more different in looks and minds. While Archie takes every day as a challenge and doesn't fear to speak his mind no matter who he's offending, Darwin takes his sweet time in everything he's doing, is soft spoken and sugarcoats every bad information.

I open my mouth to speak, but aunt Clarissa interrupts me again. "You don't want to know your father?"

My heart is in my throat as I look at her. She wouldn't.

"You don't know nothing about him", I say in a low voice, not willing to let my emotions get the better of me.

"You might be right. But you heard the prince. Vera was already pregnant when she left the castle. There must be someone who knows", she challenges.

I look her in the eyes and she seems confident in her claims. She wouldn't know. All these years when I asked about him, she was right there and she could have told me a long time ago, but she didn't. She can't know!

But she does. I see it in her eyes as she claims that she doesn't. And I feel the little bit of power I have over my life loosening its hold on me a little more.

"Are you blackmailing me?", I whisper slumping my shoulders almost in defeat..

But I wouldn't let her see it.

"I'm not exactly blackmailing you. We both want something. I want the goodness of our household and you want to know about the man who sired you. By going to the castle, you will be in close proximity with every servant that worked there along with your mother. They might be servants, but they know every movement that goes on in there. And as the boys declared not too long ago, you are not fit for a servant. So you have only one choice. Marry the king."

She is definitely blackmailing me.

"Why not just tell me yourself?"

"Because what I know are only rumours, so I can't know if they are true or not. We wouldn't want to mislead you, now would we?"

I look at her for another minute not saying anything and then turn around and get out the door, the tears I've tried to hold in front of her streaming down my face. But I keep my head high. I won't give her the satisfaction of seeing me breaking down.