Lost

Fated

                                           Running through the woods, I can feel the dirt beneath my paws.                                                          There’s another wolf running with me, when it comes into view, it’s fur is a dark                                                             chestnut brown. It feels familiar but it’s not Ash.

                                            When we get to a small clearing, we shift back and it’s Deacon?

                                                                               Why am I with Deacon?

                            As he walks up to me, he leans me against a tree and kisses me passionately.                                         The confusion I feel apparently doesn’t translate to the dream,                                                 because I reciprocate the kiss and even advance it.                                     Removing my shirt, he does the same and our bodies press together as                                                                         he licks and sucks my neck.

                        Suddenly everything turns black, fading away, and in it’s place I’m in another field.                                                         When I look around, I see shifters everywhere.

                                                I’m in the middle of a long line of shifters, next to me is Ash.                                         Across from us is a long line of shifters with a wolf about as big as Ash,                                                                      black and grey fur mixing together.

                                            Suddenly, this wolf lunges at me and I charge towards him.                                                     As soon as we make contact, everything fades again.

                                                                       This time, the black abyss stays.

                            To my right, a white light appears, making a sound but quickly disappearing.

                                                                                   What was that?

                                The blackness flickers and for a split second the scene of me fighting                                                                 is back but leaves as quickly as it came.

                                                The same happens with the scene of me with Deacon.

                                                                                What is going on?

                                           For just a moment the black abyss is replaced with white.

                                                                                        “Your”

                                                    What? Was that a word? It sounded familiar…

                                                    As soon as the sound faded, so did the white.

                                                I’m so confused… I have no idea what’s going on.

                                     When it reappears, it’s just a small white light in front of me.

                                                                                    “Necklace”

                    Three more times it appears and leaves just a quick, each time it comes with a word.

                                                                                        “Call”

                                                                                    “Necklace”

                                                                                        “Me”

                                           It feels like I know what it means, but it’s not coming to me.

                                                  Once more the light comes, once more it speaks.

                                                                                    “Thala”

                                                                                Then it hits me.

                                    Imagining grabbing my necklace while I sleep, I call for Thala.

                                                                            Nothing happens.

                                                         I wait and wait, but nothing happens.

                                                            Then everything starts flickers.

                                                   Black, white, black, white, on and on again.

                                               Finally the white wins, and everything is silent.                                                                                                   Then the white fades into the field I met Thala in before.

                                                                    Walking up to her I ask,

                                                                    “What just happened?”

                                                            “You’ve been having visions, yes?”

                                                         “I, uh, I’ve been having weird dreams.”

                                               “They are visions, Bailey. You must be careful –”

                    “Visions? Of the future? That doesn’t make sense, I was with Enzo. And Deacon.                     And I think even Elias. How is that going to happen? All of them? That can’t happen.                                     And those fights? Why was I fighting? Who was I fighting?”

                                Gripping my arms gently, she calms me and continues speaking.

               “Not all of them are true, there has been some interference and false visions sent to you.”

                                                                “What do you mean? By who?”

                                “Xaos has been tampering with your visions and changing what you see.                                                                              He wants to prevent you from finding your mate.”

                                                “But why? Why does my love life matter to him?”

                            “As a God, he knows you have a Fated Mate. Fated Mates can be powerful.                                  When you mate with him, you will share your power with him, he will become just as powerful as you.                                         If that were to happen, he knows he would not win this war.                                                You are powerful by yourself and can defeat him on your own, but he has more of a chance to                                                     manipulate you or keep you from accessing your full power.                                                         Once you are mated, nothing can stop you.”

                                                                        “Who is my True Mate?”

                        As I ask the question, my heart races in my chest and even in this dream world                                                         I feel sweaty and anxious for the answer.

                                                                        “I cannot answer that.”

                                                                                  “Why not?”

“It is forbidden, the Gods decided long ago that we cannot interfere with Fated Mates, for good or for bad.”

                                                    “Then how come Xaos can get away with it?!”

                                                “He has found and taken advantage of a loophole.                                                       The Gods would not find what he’s doing as directly effecting you being with your Fated Mate.                                         He’s never spoken to you about it or told you anything directly.”

                                                                            “That’s so stupid!”

                                         “I know. Gods are not always right. But I can’t change that.                                                            The only thing I can tell you is to follow your heart. Your heart knows who your mate is.”

                             With that, my heart starts racing again and my mind spins with thoughts.

        “When you find your mate and receive your mate marks, Xaos will no longer be able to reach your                                                 visions. If you need anything, I will be here for you Bailey.”

                                        Before I can say anything, she disappears and I wake up.

        The sun is high in the sky when I open my eyes. According to my phone it’s seven in the morning.

        As I go over everything I just learned, my head spins. So none of those dreams -or visions- were real? Or wait, only some of them were? The intimate ones are definitely fake, but I guess the others are up for debate.

        Xaos is a straight up d**k.

        Getting out of bed, I go grab some clothes and take a shower as quickly as possible, texting Val on my way to the bathroom.

        To Val: Hey! Good morning! I gotta talk to you ASAP. Taking a shower now, pick me up in twenty?

        From Val: Good morning babes! Sounds good can’t wait! See you then!

        Setting a timer on my phone so I don’t take too long, I wash my body and hair, getting out right before the timer goes off.

        Sweet! I knew I could be quick, I’m not that spoiled now.

        Laughing at myself while I put on my clothes, I look at Ash’s shirt and my thoughts go back to last night.

        Fated Mate. Follow your heart. I already know.

        Do I?

        Shaking the thoughts out of my head, I finish getting ready and go downstairs to wait for Val.

        Walking into the kitchen, I see Jack by the counter mixing sugar into his coffee. He turns around when he hears me come in and gives me a big smile.

        “Want some coffee?”

        “I’d love some, thank you. Val should be here in a few minutes to pick me up.” Walking over, I give him a hug like every morning.

        “I’ll put it in a to-go cup, then.” He says, patting my shoulder and walking to the cupboard.

        “I shifted last night at midnight.” I blurt out awkwardly. I’ve been looking forward to telling him, but I definitely could have done it less awkwardly.

        “At midnight? Hmm.”

        “Yeah, Ash helped me through it. I looked at my wolf in the lake, it was beautiful. I’d never seen anything like it, Ash said he’d never heard of anyone looking like that either.”

        “That’s lovely, dear. What did you look like?” he asks, slight amusement in his voice. He can tell I’m excited to tell him, he’s always read me so well.

        “At first I thought I was pure silver, which I was, but when I moved under the moonlight I was opalescent. So many different colors at once. It was amazing.”

        “Oh my, that sounds magnificent. I’m so proud of you.” Turning back around, he gives me a hug and hands me my coffee. As I take my first sip, a horn beeps out front.

        “Have fun. I’ll be sure to tell Ash you’ve gone out so he doesn’t worry.”

        At the mention of Ash, my cheeks warm but I ignore it and thank him before leaving.

        “Hey! Are you excited for your celebration today?” Val asks, full of excitement.

        “Yeah, but there’s something else I need to talk to you about.”

        “Ooh, I can’t wait to hear this, I just know it’s gonna be juicy.” She smirks and starts driving.

        “So, last night I had a dream. Well not really but –”

        “Did you have another dream of one of my cousins? Because – ew. No judgment though.”

        “No I had a dream of Dea– never mind. Let me start at the end and work my way back, it’ll make more sense.”

        Explaining how Thala came to me again and how Xaos was messing with me, Val has to pull into a parking lot while I explain and answer her questions.

        “So why is he messing with your dreams – or visions?”

        “Thala said it’s because I have a, uh, Fated Mate and he doesn’t want me to mate with them.”

        “Okay, one, that’s amazing! Fated Mates are so rare and everyone wants one, they’re like the best love you can ever have! Two, why the f**k does he want to mess with your love life?” The amount of anger and disgust on her face right now is kinda funny.

        “Apparently when I mate with them, I share my power with them and they become as strong as me. As I am now, I can kill Dorian and stop Xaos’ plan, but Xaos can more easily f**k with me and manipulate me. When I’m mated, the both of us together can definitely stop him, so he doesn’t want that.”

        “That makes sense.” She says calmly, but in the next moment, she’s anything but calm. “So who’s your mate?!”

        “I’m not sure. Thala couldn’t tell me, but she said to follow my heart and that I already know.”

        “So who do you think it is?” she asks, looking at me like it’s obvious.

        “I don’t know, maybe Ash?”

        “Of course! Are you kidding me? The s****l tension around you two is painful! Have you talked to him about it yet?”

        I can feel my face turning red at her comments, she can be so blunt sometimes.

        “No, uh, not yet.” I say, preparing for the aftermath.

        “Not yet?! Why not? b***h why are you here with me?? Go tell him!” before she’s even finished yelling, she’s put the car in drive, flooring it back to Ash’s house.

        “What am I supposed to tell him? ‘I think you’re my fated mate, let’s find out.’? Are you serious?”

        “Do you even know how to find out?” she deadpans, looking over to me for a second.

        “Well, I uh, not really, no.”

        “A kiss should do it.” she shrugs, smiling at me.

        “A kiss? Why a kiss?”

        “Dunno, I guess cause it’s physical contact in a romantic way.”

        Before I could ask anything else, she pulls up to Ash’s house and quite literally shoves me out the car door.

        “Let me know how it goes!” she yells, then drives away laughing.

        Rolling my eyes, I let out a deep sigh and walk back inside.

        I was hoping she wouldn’t do that, but I had a feeling. She’s been trying to get me to make a move on Ash for a while now, I should have expected it.

        Walking into the living room, I sit on the couch across from Jack and watch whatever movie he’s got on.

        “Back so soon?”

        “Yeah… I, uh… yeah.” I mumble, not even sure what I was trying to say. My mind is riddled with so many thoughts, it’s hard to concentrate.

        “You okay?” he asks, leaning forward and looking more seriously now.

        “Yeah, I’m fine. Thala talked to me last night again, that’s what I was talking to Val about.”

        “Oh that’s great, what did she tell you?”

        “Well, apparently I, uh, I get visions.”

        “What have you had visions of?” he seems very excited and genuinely interested. Before I could respond, though, the phone rang.

        “I’ll be right back.”

        While I wait for him to come back, I curl up on the couch, pulling my knees to my chest and leaning on my side. As soon as I’ve gotten comfy, I hear footsteps coming through the entryway, but how I’m positioned I can’t see who’s coming. I assume it’s Jack, but when he sits next to me, I can smell Ash’s scent and anxiety and excitement fight for dominance.

        “Good morning,” he yawns, his voice still raspy from sleep. “sleep well?”

        “Uh, I, y-yeah, I slept fine.”

        Oh come on, Bailey. That was such an easy sentence. Why was it so hard to say one sentence? There’s no way in hell he’ll interpret ‘Yeah, I slept fine.’ As ‘yeah, we’re fated mates. Kiss me.’ You f*****g twit. Get your s**t together Bailey.

        “You okay?” he asks, confused by my idiotic behavior. Internally rolling my eyes at myself, I open my mouth to respond, but before I can Jack walks around the corner.

        “So what visions have you had?” he asks before he notices Ash right there. “Oh, did she tell you, too?”

        “Tell me what?” he looks between me and his dad with confusion. They both look to me, expecting me to explain.

        “I, uh, Thala talked to me again last night. She said the dreams I’ve been having were visions. Some were real, others weren’t. Xaos had been giving me false visions to confuse me and stop me from… something. I’m still trying to figure out which ones were real and which weren’t. I know some that aren’t, but I don’t know if I’ve missed any.”

        “That’s great that you know now, but what would Xaos want to keep you from doing? Besides stopping him, obviously.”

        “Well… I have a… Fated Mate.”

        Suddenly everything goes silent.

                                                                                        ASHER

        When Bailey says she has a Fated Mate, my heart sinks. My wolf believes we’re mates, and I love her, but…

         What if we’re not? If we were, wouldn’t she be excited to tell me? Maybe she doesn’t know. Should I tell her? What if I’m wrong?

        “Who’s the lucky guy?” my father asks, either unaware or unfazed by my inner turmoil.

        For a few seconds, Bailey freezes, her face turns bright red but she feigns confidence… or at least tries to.

        “I’m, uh, not sure.” For a second after she speaks, she looks directly into my eyes and a spark of hope ignites in my chest.

        “Bailey, can we –” just as I start speaking, the phone interrupts me. I’d ignore it, but it’s the office phone, which is only used for pack business, within my own pack and others.

        “I’ll go get it, don’t worry.” Dad says, patting my shoulder with a smile. As he walks away, I focus again on Bailey.

        “So, I uh, I wanted to talk to you.”

        “Yeah, me too.” She admits, sheepishly smiling.

        “I think, I mean I might, maybe, uh… let me start over.” Laughing awkwardly, she laughs with me but there’s no judgment in her eyes. There never is, she’s the sweetest person anyone could ever hope to know.

        “I think we might be –” before I can finish my sentence, my dad rushes into the room.

        “Sorry guys, but Ash we need to go to Town Hall.”

                                                                                     BAILEY

        “Why, what’s wrong?” Concern tinges Ash’s voice, but there’s also some frustration there, too.

        “The other alphas are on their way, they’ve called an emergency meeting of the packs.” He says, and I can tell how serious it is by how fast Ash jumps out of his chair.

        “I’m sorry, we’ll finish talking about this later.” He says as he turns around.

        Jumping to my feet, I rush after them. When I’ve caught up, I keep to Ash’s side and smile.

        “Did you really think I wouldn’t be coming too?” I ask with a smile, bumping my shoulder into his arm.

        Gods, why can’t it be this easy talking to him about feelings? It’s always easy to talk to him about everything – everything except how I feel and the possibility of us being Fated Mates. Ugh.

        “Oh I knew you’d be coming, I was just wondering why it took you that long to catch up.” He jokes, smiling back at me.

        Our smiles fade as we walk into the meeting room, the alphas are already here and they look worried. We walk to our seats, Enzo saved two next to each other this time, I guess he knew I’d be coming too. But there’s one face I was not expecting to see.

        On the opposite side of the table, a few chairs to my right sits no other than Deacon. I can’t take my eyes off of him. I hadn’t noticed I was squeezing my knees as tightly as I was until Ash reached under the table to take my hand off of my leg and he had to use more effort than he’s had to before.

        “What’s wrong?” he asks, leaning in close to my ear.

        “Deacon.” Is all I can say while I continue to stare straight at him.

        I feel his muscles tense and anger radiates from him, before I can stop him, he’s launched to his feet and looks directly at Deacon.

        “What are you doing here?” Ash demands with the authority of an alpha, startling everyone except Enzo and Jack.

        One of the alphas stand up to speak for him, but he stands along with them and shakes his head.

        “I’m here to warn Bailey.” He says confidently, but there’s a deep sadness in his eyes.

        “Warn her? Why should we believe you? You were going to bring her to be sacrificed by those degenerate “Elders”.

        “I know. It doesn’t make up for my original intentions, but once I had actually met her and gotten to know her, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. That’s why I was taking her the opposite direction, why I let her leave without pursuing her. Despite how badly I wanted to, to explain to her that I would never do that, that I’m sorry, that I hated myself every day I was with her and didn’t tell the truth of my original intentions. But that doesn’t make it better. And it certainly doesn’t mean she’ll believe me, and she has every right not to. But I’m here to warn her, she deserves that much, and it’s the least I can do to pay for my mistakes.”

        Before Ash can respond, I stand up and place my hand on his chest to stop him. Slowly and calmly, I walk around the table until I’m face to face with Deacon. I can feel the tension coming from Ash. Looking into Deacon’s eyes, I see desperation, sorrow, and a pleading to believe him.

        I do believe him. But I can’t just forgive him. Not in front of a room full of alphas who only know what I am and not who I am. I can’t show them weakness and forgiving him after such a betrayal would be portrayed as weakness, telling them they can do the same.

        And just because he’s sorry and regrets what he’s done doesn’t mean he wouldn’t betray me again.

        Nodding in acknowledgement of his apology, I keep my face completely neutral while I slap him across the face hard enough to knock him off balance momentarily.

        “That may be true, but you have to earn my forgiveness. You can start by telling me what you came to warn me about.”

        Walking back to my seat, I notice the smirk on Ash’s face. He definitely liked the smack. As I sit back down, underneath the table, Ash fist bumps me and I have to hold in my laughter.

        So serious on the outside, so childish on the inside.

        At least things are never boring between the two of us.

        “It’s about Dorian. As you probably know by now, he wants you. He also wants to kill every remaining Royal –”

        “I’m already aware of this.” I interrupt, keeping my voice neutral.

        “He’s already killing Royals.” That got my attention.

        “Who? Where? When?” I ask in quick succession, my neutral act slipping away.

        “He’s killed two more Royals, Josephine Crescent and Graham Eclipse. They were on opposite sides of Nebraska. He killed one himself and sent his men to kill the other at the same time, so neither would have a chance to go into hiding. This was two nights ago. I believe he’s on his way to find you, killing any Royals he can find before he gets you.”

        “We must do something to stop him.” One of the other alphas said.

        “I will stop him. Any help you are willing to lend to distract his men is appreciated.” I tell them.

        “You? How are you going to stop him?”

        “Why should we believe you’re capable of stopping him?” two alphas ask in unison. Before I can answer, Ash stands up looking ready to kill them both. I stretch my arm out in front of him to stop him from speaking.

        “Quite frankly, I don’t care what you believe. But I am the only True Alpha alive that any of us knows of. I am a Midnight, I have witch and vampire blood running through my veins, making me even more powerful. And if that were not enough to show you I am capable, the Goddess herself has told me I am the only one who can kill him because he has the help of a God himself.”

        For a moment, everyone is stunned. Everyone except Ash, Enzo, and Jack that is. None of this is news to them.

        “How are we supposed to believe you? That you are a Midnight was hard enough to believe at the last meeting, now you say you have witch and vampire blood, too? And the Goddess spoke to you? That’s ridiculous!” the alpha that repeatedly questions my capabilities says.

        “She is definitely a Midnight.” Deacon says, surprising me.

        “How would you know?” the insufferable alpha asks again.

        I’d like to know that, too.

        “I had my suspicions at first when I told her about my past and saw the empathy and understanding in her eyes. She had been through the same. The more I looked at her, the more I recognized her as the girl I’d see with Alpha Roman so often. I was from Moon Spirit Pack when I was young, my parents died that night, but I was luckily… or unfortunately… at my grandmother’s when everyone died.”

        No… That can’t be… He must be lying…

        But how would he have known when we first met that I had been through the same? If he didn’t know, why would he have shared that with me unless it were true?

        It doesn’t matter. I can’t trust him just because we’re from the same pack. A lot has changed since we were kids.

        “Even so, the rest is hard to believe.”

        “I vouch for the validity of her power and lineage.” Ash affirms.

        “I vouch for her as well.” Jack adds.

        “I vouch for her also.” Enzo agrees.

        “Still, she simply cannot be trusted to kill Dorian herself. She’s… a woman.”

        “I will not be by myself. I will have my Fated Mate by my side.” I announce.

        This is as good a time as any… right?

        I mean, I’m ninety nine point nine percent sure it’s Ash.

        It has to be.

        Right?

        “And who might that be?” the annoying apparently misogynistic alpha asks.

        Before I can say anything, Ash grabs my hand and raises them for everyone to see.

        “Me.” He says.

        My heart leaps and races in my chest.

        He knew.

        How did he know?

        It doesn’t matter. I know it’s him, it has to be.

        I love him.

        The alpha doesn’t ask any more questions and for the rest of the meeting, we talk about what we’re going to do.

        After we leave Town Hall, Ash and I go to the lake to talk. He continues to hold my hand, he never let go of it once during the meeting and still isn’t while we walk.

        For a moment we just sit there quietly on the cliff, neither one of us knowing how to start this conversation. Finally I get the courage to ask.

        “How did you know it was you?”

        He takes a minute to think about his answer.

        “Ever since you came here, my wolf has been telling me you’re my mate.” He says sheepishly.

        “Why didn’t you say anything?” I ask, shocked that he’s known for so long.

        “I wanted to… I was going to, but then… that night in the motel room when you said you weren’t the one for me, that I deserved better… I wanted to tell you so badly, but I could see you were struggling with something and I wanted to give you time to figure out what you wanted.”

        “I always wanted you. It was just… Xaos has been giving me false visions, visions of me with… other men. I didn’t think I was attracted to them like that, but it confused me why I was dreaming of them, and I couldn’t let myself be with you while I was having those dreams.”

        He stays silent while he takes in everything I said, eventually asking the thing everyone wants to know at first.

        “Why would he care about your love life?”

        “When I mate with my Fated Mate, I share my power with him and we become equally as strong. I could defeat Dorian on my own, but by myself it’d be easier to manipulate me. When I’m mated, he can’t give me false visions anymore.”

        Another lengthy silence falls over us, then out of the blue Ash turns to me and before I can even process what’s happening his lips are against mine. This time there is no gentle start, this kiss is full of passion and need from the very beginning and I kiss him back with the same intensity.