Healer For Alpha

Dealt With

{ Rio }

All through school a lot of kids wanted to be our friends and although we were always friendly with everyone, we never formed real friendships with anyone because it was always just the three of us and that's the way we liked it. Alex, Laurie and I, that was all we needed.

The others were just people we would sometimes go out to dinner with or who would invite us to their parties, but we never formed meaningful connections with anyone.

I'm regretting that now.

Because both Alex and Laurie are now dead to me, of course, but also because it means that when I get to Fallonmore I have no one to call. I have no one to turn to, no one who's not part of my family.

I mean, I could call some old friends to go for a drink or hang out, but to ask them for a place to stay? I don't think so. Fortunately, I have money and that's all I need to go lock myself in the hotel of Fallonmore.

That's where I stay, marinating in self-pity and deep hatred for my old friends. Including Lunanci now... for a while.

The inhibitors ran out yesterday and I don't have the strength to get up to buy more, so now instead of just hating Lunanci, I'm having a constant internal fight with my wolf about how even though he doesn't like what I saw, he's certain it doesn't mean anything. At least not what I’m thinking it means.

But he's nothing more than an animal in love. He thinks Luna can do no wrong. I, on the other hand, am pretty sure she can.

She doesn't have the bond, she doesn't feel anything real for me, not like I do. And I know her so well at this point that I know how much she's willing to do anything to get what she wants, even sleep with someone to secure a place to stay in a clan. Any clan.

So, here I am... doing nothing. Literally nothing, I just turn on the TV for a little distraction during the day and that's it.

I don't even know how long I've been here, I think three days... or four? It doesn't matter. I'll stay here until I feel like moving again.

Someone suddenly starts knocking on my door and I'm sure it's that annoying woman who insists on cleaning my room, but I don't feel like getting up to yell at her to leave me alone again, I just get under the covers and wait for her to leave. Except she doesn't, this time she opens the damn door and gives herself permission to come in.

I pull the covers off to complain, but I immediately cover myself up again when I see it's not that woman.

It's three alphas who shouldn't be here.

"It stinks like dead fish in here," my uncle Rodrick complains as I'm squeezing my eyes shut and wishing I could disappear, "Goddamn, open the window."

No one answers anything, but suddenly something hits me in the stomach and knocks all the f*****g air out of me.

"Lucinda!" Uncle Daniel complains and rips the blanket off my body, "Rio, just get up. You have some explaining to do."

"I don't want to. Go away," I whine when I can finally breathe again after the blow my mother gave me. Rodrick is opening the curtains to let the daylight in, then he opens the window to air out the room. My mom is standing on the side of the bed just like Daniel and they are both looking at me with a mixture of disgust and concern, "I don't want to talk to anyone. I don't even care to know how you found out I'm here."

"Laurie finally confessed that you stole his car so we just had to look for it," my mother tells me even though I just said I didn't want to know, "Rodrick, his scent isn't normal. Call a doctor."

"I don't need a damn doctor, I just want you guys gone!" I growl and study my mother. Her hair is down, which is weird and she's not wearing a uniform or formal wear, which is weird too, "You especially, I want you to leave."

"Why? Because I think you can't survive on your own and I'm right?" She spits, but Daniel gives her a heavy look, like he's warning her not to be such a b***h. Uncle Daniel is a serious father too, but even though he’s known Laurie is an alpha for a long time, he never stopped treating him with love, not like my mom, "This is not the time for you to get sentimental, Rio. If you saw yourself... you really need to be checked out."

"I will if you leave," I insist. Strangely, she looks upset, "Don't pretend you care about me now. And it's not even that serious, I'm just not doing amazingly, I'll be fine in a day or two."

"It is that serious, kid," Daniel says as Rodrick starts to talk to someone on the phone, "It's been four days since you've been here without coming out, we're worried. Your mother is very worried even if she can't show it."

"Pff," I roll my eyes, "Look at her, she's rejoicing in the fact that she was right. I'm useless and impulsive and all that crap you say about me. You win, now go away."

"Can you give us a moment?" my mother asks, looking at my uncles and not me. They both agree and leave the room, but she stays here. I try to grab the blanket again but it's too far from me so I give up, "I don't know what the hell is going on with you or why you're so mad at me, but you're wrong. Look at me. I've never worried so much in my life, nothing worries me as much as you do."

"Because I'm useless?"

"Basically," she replies and now I do try to get up to grab that damn blanket, but my mother sits on the bed next to me and makes it impossible, "You're useless and dumb, I don't trust your decisions, you have a lot to learn. I know you have potential and talent, you just haven't found it yet and that's why I didn't want to let you leave the house. Because I love you and I care. And I worry. If you weren't so dumb, you would take a second to realize that."

"If you hadn't changed with me the second I presented as an alpha, maybe I'd think that," I blurt out, since she's here and wants to get it all out in the open, "A few months ago, I'd think you loved me, but not now."

"Rio," she groans, closing her eyes for a few seconds, "In what way have I changed? I've only tried to make you stronger. Ever since you presented, I've been happy for you and trying to turn you into the alpha I want you to be and that's it. You're the one who walked away."

"Because it's annoying! It's annoying having you over my shoulder talking about the academy and all that s**t I don't care about, forcing me to be someone I'm not and treating me like I'm... like I'm your friend or your co-worker, not your son. Not like Alex."

"Because he's different," she replies, but she sounds and looks tired now, "You wanted me to treat you like an omega?"

"Like you love me? Maybe," I snort a laugh, "What does our designation have to do with how you treat us? Don't you see? That's the whole problem. With both Alex and me. All our lives we were the same until that day when you decided you were going to treat us differently just because of our designation and that screwed everything up."

That finally makes my mom shut her mouth and think for a second.

"Alex..." I continue, swallowing. I don't care about Alex or what happens to him, like I said, but I think my mom will care, "Alex is in Tallahide pretending to be me. He's been at the academy all this time, I don't even know where that place is. I don't want to be at the academy and I'm not going to let you make me."

"What?" She lets out in a very low, deep tone and her face gets hard as she looks at me as if I'm to blame. Her whole body tenses up and I feel a slight surge of relief because I know she will do something to stop Alex. That pleases me because I want to ruin his life, not because I want to protect him. At least that's what I'll tell myself.

"You heard, mother. So go stop him," I order, but instead of her getting up to run to Alex immediately, she stays here, "I'll open a bakery. I'll sell my cookies and maybe other things, whether you like it or not. I have Grandpa on my side."

"What the f**k is going on?" she blurts out and covers her face for a second to growl there, "So all this time I had to worry about Alex and not you?"

"Exactly," I blurt out, not mentioning that she definitely had to worry about me too. After all, she's right about what she thinks of me.

"And what the f**k is wrong with you then? Why are you in here rotting in this radioactive bed?" She asks, looking at me worriedly again, "Did something happen?"

"Just minor stuff," I lie, but her eyes get sharp, "Seriously, I'll get over it soon."

"You don't look like it, Rio," she blurts out and lifts a hand to touch my forehead like she did when I was a kid. I'm so starved for love that I don't even get annoyed, "Have you been..."

Before she can finish her question, the door opens again and my uncles walk in along with an unfamiliar man who is wearing a robe with the hotel’s logo in it.

"That's him, Doc," Rodrick points at me, as if it's not obvious. My mother stands up to let the doctor approach, "He smells like doom and hot garbage."

"I'm not sick, I just haven't showered in a while," I reply, rolling my eyes, "There's no need for all this."

"Your body odor is strong, for sure, but there's definitely something else," the doctor assures and walks over to me. He sets his bag down on the bed and pulls something out before grabbing my face and lifting it up to him, "Keep your eyes open at all times."

Without any warning, the doctor lets drops fall in my eyes and they make me moan in pain, I want to squeeze my eyes shut but I force myself to keep them open as he watches them carefully.

"Your wolf is not responding properly, what's wrong with him?"

I stay silent then. I have no idea what the hell he did or how that let him know my wolf is the one with the problem, but it takes me by surprise. I look back at the three alphas who are watching us with their full attention.

"Can I have some privacy?"

"No," my mom replies immediately, "Tell us what's wrong with you."

"Lucinda, he is an alpha. He has a right to privacy," the doctor replies, "Please leave us.”

"Yes, leave us," I repeat, "And while you're at it, go to Alex and take care of him. And Laurie, too. Laurie's the one who's facilitating everything for him, he’s to blame, too."

"What do you mean?" Daniel asks, "What is Laurie doing now?"

"Putting my brother in danger, so go get him and stop them both," I demand. They want to keep asking questions, but my mom grabs my uncles and forces them out of the room.

"Your dad is coming to pick you up any minute so you better let the doctor fix you up and then take a long shower," my mom warns, "I'll be back to talk to you after I deal with Alex."

Everyone leaves after that and I return my attention to the doctor, calmer now that it's just the two of us.

"My wolf has a one sided bond with someone. It's making him miserable not being able to be with her, so that's why he's in hiding right now. We're in a standstill," I admit and the doctor nods slowly as if that explains everything, he even turns away from me and puts the drops in his bag, "What? That was it?”

"It explains why he's letting you self-destruct," he replies and crosses his arms to look deeply at me again, "I'm no expert on one sided bonds, I don't think I've ever heard of a case, but I know it's not easy for any wolf when his human counterpart is keeping him away from his mate."

"It's necessary."

"And I imagine this is how you've been dealing with the issue?" he asks and reaches over to the cabinet beside my bed to grab the empty inhibitor bottle I stupidly left there, "Predictable. Very predictable. You know, when it comes to omegas and bonds, all alphas are exactly the same."

"It's the only way to deal with a wolf in love, dude," I defend myself, "You don't know how it feels."

"Maybe I don't know firsthand, but I know exactly how it feels," he replies and pockets my empty bottle, "So, first order of business, don't keep taking inhibitors. You're a strong man, you can deal with a little pinning."

"With all due respect, Doc, you don't know me. I'm not that strong."

"You could be. It's not a disease to suffer for someone, but denying a bond so strongly or trying to suppress your wolf can manifest into a physical illness and that's what's wrong with you," he explains, pointing a finger at me, "Taking inhibitors isn't a permanent fix for anything. They are addictive, they weaken your system, they destroy your cycle and only serve to make your wolf even more angry. They should only be used in extreme cases."

Everyone abuses inhibitors and I understand why. It's great to be left alone and shut your mind. I'd love to be like that forever.

"Now that we put that aside, you've definitely somatized your emotions, you're expressing everything you feel physically," he explains, "You reek of depression and mental exhaustion. Have you been eating?"

"Sometimes."

"You're a grown alpha. Have you been eating like you should?"

"No."

"Have you been drinking water like you should?"

"No."

"Have you been sleeping like you should?"

"No."

"And all this for a one sided bond?" He snorts as if it's funny.

"Yes," I mumble back. When he puts it like that, I sound pathetic.

"The omega in question is no longer available to you?"

"The woman in question isn't even an omega and that's the f*****g problem," I growl, unable to stop myself, "She's only part wolf. Not enough to create a bond to me."

The doctor's mouth drops open as he thinks about it. I love how saying 'part wolf' leaves out the fact that she's mostly human but still explains the problem.

"Maybe she's not that interested in you?" he asks.

"She's very interested in me," I growl, though I don't even know if that's the case anymore.

"Then why not let your wolf have partial access to her?"

"Because he's obsessed but she can’t reciprocate like a bonded omega would. If I stay around her I will only become more obsessed and she will not. So this level of pain doesn't even come close to what I'll feel later on.”

"Oh, well," he blurts out, rolling his eyes, "Then you have to force yourself to man up and deal with the pain now. By taking inhibitors and denying the pain you're just extending it."

"It's an impossible situation," I groan.

"You just have to choose a path and stick to it. Would you like to talk to a psychologist?"

"Nah, I'll be fine."

"I hope so, but I don't trust you to take care of yourself," he says and pulls a notebook and pen out of his bag, "I'm going to prescribe some things for you."

"What is it?"

"Stuff I have to give to little pups," he replies, "Protein shakes, vitamins and electrolytes. You’re clearly underweight for an alpha.”

"Come on, man, I don't need all that," I complain as he writes it down.

"I want you to personally go to the pharmacy and buy this stuff so you'll be embarrassed to be an alpha who doesn't know how to take care of himself. And while we're at it, I'll make it so you can't buy inhibitors anymore. You'll have to deal with your problems from now on instead of continuing to push them down."

Amazing.