Chapter Six
958 Words
He was sitting on a stool in Clary's kitchen with a cup of coffee, hugging the cup in his both hand.
It has been a week since she left.
Clary is his only road to know anything about her. Yet even clary did know nothing about her since then.
She didn't pick up his calls or messages. He tried to get her to the company but she didn't come for once, finishing all her tasks and delivering them online.
The doorbell rang ...once... Twice.
They look at each other in askance.
By looking outside the window...
here she was.
Impatiently, She stomped on Clary's doormat.
Clary hurried him to hide while she gets the door. finally, the aunt decided to open the door.
"You could take a little longer, please. No rush." Sarcastically said.
The younger girl walked past the older women as if she owned the place.
"Oh please come in. Make yourself at home." She mimicked Nayla which Rolled her eyes in response.
Nayla threw herself on the couch letting a huge sigh out in the process.
"Spell it already." Her aunt demanded.
Tilting forward, she fidgets with her fingers. "He ruined me."
THE FVCKER. HE WILL CHOP HIS BALLS OFF.
Did she force himself on her?
Thank god Clary heard his thoughts?
"What?! Did sean force himself upon you? Did he rape you?"
In horror, she looked at Clary. "What! No".
A sigh of relief was let out by both of them.
"What happened?" Clary closed the distance between them rubbing her back.
"You know. We went on a date together. He was a nice talkative person. It was a really good time. I didn't feel much. But I didn't put a lot of weight on it. I said maybe because I am still furious about my fight with Shun. Yesterday he called for a second date and said why not. Anyway, one lead to another, on our way he asked me if I like to drink a cup of coffee at his house. Again, why not. And again one leads to another and ... We ... were making out ... on his loveseat sofa."
He could feel the anger rising from his stomach reaching his bloody eyes. He closed them, balling his fist.
He.will. kill.him.
After some breath practice, he slowly calmed down. He was surprised at his self-control for not going out kissing her brain off till he wipes any other kisses in her brain but his.
"I... When we were... Doing that... I closed my eyes... Imaging Shun, not Sean.".
Say what?
"That was then when I realized, He ruined me for any other man. I can not stop wishing that he was Shun instead." Tears came to fall with loud sobs.
She added. "I was fine. Content. Before him. Unloved. Undesirable. Unwelcomed. Why did he have to rewrite that? Why did he even ....? She couldn't continue as she broked down.
Restlessness. Why he feels like he is ... An Asshole. He did do her wrong... Right?
She confused him. Guilt and shame filled his all. He was sure he treated her as his own. Maybe he was a coward for not saying that he liked her... He did. nd a douche bag for letting her go. But otherwise, for 3 months they barely fought. Or quarreled.
Did he unconsciously make her uncomfortable? The idea of him doing that makes him hate himself the most.
At last, Clary talked. "I could advise you with a million ideas and talk to you dor hours. But I think the best thing is to voice your worries and fears to him."
Between her sobs she said." I couldn't answer his calls or messages."
Her aunt cleared her throat and glanced over him. He got what she would do.
"He is here." She stated.
"What!" Nayla couldn't comprehend what her aunt was saying. "Who is here?"
"Me."
Footing out of his hiding place.
Nayla's eye rounded. She kept opening and closing her mouth. Trying to rotate any words out. She could not.
"Can you leave us alone for a while?" He asked Clary. She just nodded and left.
After a few moments of silence. He couldn't hold any longer.
"I ... I heard everything... Yet, I couldn't grasp how did I hurt you by liking you? What did I do wrong? Where did I do wrong?".
She chuckled dryly.
"What did you do wrong!" She whispered to herself than to him.
Again he inquired. "What's wrong Nayla?"
"What's wrong? Are you joking me or something? You said you heard everything?" She raised her voice slightly.
"Why are you mad at me?" Mimicking her tune.
She stood up. "Actually, I am not mad.
I am disappointed. I am frustrated.
There are too many feelings, I just can't deal with them. Not anymore.
What did I do? Nothing. And this is the problem. You did nothing.
You came to my life. I was just fine with all my sadness, disdainful, and helplessness. You wanted to change everything thing inside me. I was dealing very well with my consciousness. But NO NO you had to tell me how beautiful I am. How special I am. How lucky you are to have me. You had to change every f*****g single thing I believed about me.
Why? Why couldn't you just let me live the way I was. You made me believe I can fly. You made me believe I am one of a kind. Then… Then pushed me off the cliff. Alone. You weren't there. And I had to discover that I couldn't fly. I can't. You left. You disappeared. You gave me this little sweet and left me for hunger.
I am addicted now to the feelings you gave to me!
I don't know how to live without it.
I am addicted to your touches I felt disgusted when he touched me Shun. I closed my eyes to see you instead of him.
Just tell me how? Or why?
You should just let me be... Me.
Why just tell me why?? Why??"
- Writer
