My only sunshine forever

Chapter 5: triggered conscience

Adina POV

I have been busy trying to keep up with my boss grumpy attitude, I wouldn't lie that I wasn't hurt by what he said to me the second day I started working. I have actually grown way past holding someone in mind.

And am actually in love with Tatty, well a sneak peek I don't call her Tatty, I call her Bluey because of her blue colored eyes, looking closer into her eyes you'd be lost in her ocean like eyes. I actually fall in love with her at first sight. Think she kinda like that name because immediately I say bluey she's always active and happy.

I feel so sorry for her because she never got to experience a mother's love and it actually triggered my conscience as I wanna be everything for her that is if i still work as her nanny till she old to be able to fend on her own.

Well it been two months working with William, and I can see he has grown well over this month. though we have never had those type of talk you know about Tatiana, so I have only been doing my job, but I kinda want to know much about them, like my heart is just drawn to both of them.

Linda has been calling to see how things goes, though we were always having this girls talk and she concluded that I was crushing on my boss.

Well I won't deny the fact that I felt different whenever he's around. Like,am always hearing my heart thumping.

I have been in with bluey spending our time on a puzzle, literally am the only one doing it but bluey has been my active cheerleader, she edge me to keep doing it through her clapping and overly excited attitude. I think she got that from her dad. This made me remember three weeks ago that I was planning to make a michelin 5 star food, but ended up burning down the whole kitchen , but the funniest part of it was that my childish boss as of that time, actually edged me on at the end of it everywhere was looking like a mess. I also can remember our little time together, he was like "I have never seen a side to you like this"

"well it actually before you never tried to unlock that side of me" I said subconsciously.

"bluey baby"I called out. and was greeted with pile of laughter. It actually makes me happy knowing i am the one giving her joy.

"bluey what do you think we can do, it boring sitting at home all day, should we go out, oh wait what about we go have ice cream and doughnuts" I suggested. I was only answered by her babbling.

" am taking that as a yes"

So I went ahead to dress her up,I can give her adult food now because she's close to clocking a year. We were already outside, so I phone my boss that I was going out with Bluey, he instructed his driver to drive us there and he also left us his bank card, well I kinda wanna spend a little thinking now , I wanted to change bluey's closet so I call to ask if we can go shopping for some clothes.

" well also get yourself a dress we going for a family dinner in two days time" william informs me. His parents have been talking him on bringing Bluey home. And now he's telling me am coming along.

we have been out shopping for up to like some hours like every thing just interest me like is this what it feels to be a mother, like am not one yet and am already over protective of Bluey.

Bluey got me as her supporter as her wouldn't let her have ice only yoghurt so I decided to be sneaky with her mad her fruits then I inserted the straw to make it look as if it a real ice only. William was just dumbfounded at my logic. During weekends I now stay over because I wanted to be part of their little bond time, call me selfish but it just that I can't help wanting to be part of their. My inner desires are swelling, I saw want a family I can call my own, like have a daughter, a man and you know maybe a spiced up love life....or is that too much to ask for.

Last night was going to be a memorial for me, because my boss came back late and I waited till half past twelve, before he came back. And he actually came back drunk.....

Flash back from what transpired last night

"sir are you okay, is there anything wrong, you came late why"

"don't f*****g question me about my well being you all don't care" he shouted. As long as o know I didn't wanna shout because I noticed that lately he has been kind of grumpy he isn't as attentive to Bluey the way he does before, and he has been angry a lot lately too. Thinking of all this made me mad that I didn't know when I shouted back at him."f**k sake what the hell is wrong with you, why are you hurting yourself and hurting Bluey at the same time, why don't you for once be in your senses and live past your past why, you keep breaking yourself and people that loves you and you still say they don't care. Do you think i don't care, I thought coming through to do things you might never have experience from your expectations and you still f*****g say nobody cares, so who cares if you think nobody cares. you keep shutting the door everytime I think it's open. Bluey doesn't deserve she's way too innocent. Can you please just forget about everything else and be focused on the present and future, I mean the company, Bluey and you know maybe try and make your love life alive. You don't deserve to be unhappy"