We had our shop route all planned out and we headed over in the direction of the escalators, the only thing was the first shop was for me to get underwear, and really wasn’t wanting them to hang around whilst I picked up what I wanted. “Scott hand over your card, as the first shop your not going into with my Riles”. He was just about to put his foot on the escalator and lost his footing “Why on earth would I give you my card”. Getting his footing he hopped onto it, the rest of us followed suit and as we rising in the air I looked down, watching as people where going about there everyday to think only yesterday that was me. It’s funny how things can change so drastically you could be looking into a calm pond admiring the beauty of the reflection but as soon as you disturb it the ripples change the beautiful reflection to a distorted image that takes time to settle. We finally made it to the first floor and we all proceeded to walk off, Akechetah wrapped his arm around my shoulder as if sensing I was reflecting on everything that has taken place in less than twenty four hours and was still feeling overwhelmed by it all, as soon as Scott caught him his arm dropped to his side clearly he had been given some type of warning through Scott’s glance. Sod’s Law just to the right of us was the lingerie shop and my discomfort was rising once again, especially where they had just a torso of a mannequin one that was dressed in a lilac corset trimmed with lace. Again Josh came to my rescue “Scott card please we will meet you in the shoe store, because do you really want to see your niece picking out bras and thongs or Lacey knickers” suddenly Scott came over a bit horrified “Yeah, didn’t think so card please”. “Okay I get your point here you go you know the pin just don’t tell me what she got, that is something that should be kept for Victoria’s Secret”, “Taa muchly now all three of you bugger off” he then proceeded to shove them well clear of the window display.
Mouthing the word thank you to him as he proceeded to push them further clear from the shop, he then linked my arm through his and strolled in as if this was a normal everyday occurrence for him. “So what is you go to choice then conservative, sultry or just damn right dirty girty” I couldn’t believe how laid back he was my eyes just wanted to pop out of my head where he was so nonchalant about it all. “Well I usually go for shorts that are plain cotton but maybe a few black lace ones as well, no thongs I don’t do slingshots” his eyes started to tear up where he found it amusing. “never thought of that before but your right it’s like a slingshot for your butt”, in that case I would recommend some T-shirt bras and sports bras and maybe a couple of nice Lacey ones in case you want to get lucky” then winked at me “after all I hear Tyler has already spent the night with you” instantly I slapped his arm maybe a bit more harder than I planned but he was already laughing so hard his face went red “I did not spend the night with him thank you very much”, “really because Tara mentioned to me he just about put the moves on you, so I guess I know exactly what type of guy you go for then”. “Hell no that’s so not funny ”, “the way I hear it you didn’t exactly put up a fight where he just about kissed you”. “Your so funny Josh oh wait you’re not”. Deciding to change the subject because even though he has been nice, he does get under my skin but the type I go for somehow also lead to disaster. So I started looking at the selections available and once I found my style ones I got the size I needed and carried on. “Okay I promise no more winding you up so I come in peace, also I wouldn’t blame you for being cautious he’s a nice guy and all but he also can be a t**t at times, and a bit of player” I looked at him and nodded no really wanting to talk about him.
Walking over to sports bras I suddenly felt concerned I’m a slightly top heavy girl and the material looked so flimsy there was no way it wouldn’t keep them secure, “Nah your wrong, if you get the right type trust me the airbags will not be deployed”. I couldn’t help but laugh so much so I swear I actually started to cry a little bit “How, do you even know that’s what I was thinking, but say I was worried about that which ones would you recommend then”. Josh was then scanning and picking certain ones up really looking at the fabric and cut till he came to one and, seemed to approve as he nodded at it then pulled five of my size and placed them into my hands. After selecting all of what I wanted we went to the counter and paid for them, he got a kick out of it presenting Scoots card I dread to think what they thought a tall handsome man buying a female all this underwear. The cashier must have been mid twenties her hair was a caramel brown and got all hot under the collar by Josh her face was flushed I was so tempted to say “Your so barking up the wrong tree girl”, but even though I had an inkling that would have been so bitchy and I actually really liked the guy.
Walking out the shop I felt relieved that it was all placed in a black paper bag so that no one could actually see what I had, some things are most definitely kept private.
We made our way down further to find the other two just waiting looking at the clock that was on the wall, as if they were expecting us to spend hours in just one shop. I had always been get in, get what you want and then leave, shopping was always more like a chore than being heaps of fun for me. The look on there face was of relief and Josh casually handed the card back then a little mischievous glint lit up in his face and eyes “Don’t worry we only bought one corset and stockings set for now in case she wants to impress a man”. Scott’s hand flew out of nowhere and slapped Josh around the back of the head with such force it actually jolted him forward and then myself and Akechetah both proceeded to laugh whilst Scott had this look of over my dead body. Which gave me a happy buzz it’s been so long since I had someone be protective like that, it made me realise how much I actually missed such a precious act. “Right shoes next, I would say trainers and boots and when I mean boots not those things the pair of you are wearing” in unison we both chime in “hey, back of”. We then just both looked at each other and smiled then I was grabbed by the hand and pulled into the shop by him and Scott just had this exasperated look on his face and followed us whilst Josh was rubbing the back of his head laughing still where he managed to get a rise for his earlier remark. After looking back and forth at the shoes and boots on offer I settled for black boots similar to the cat boots that used to be the big must have before Ugg boots became the latest trend. Then found a decent pair of white trainers and Scott went to the till with them, whilst Josh was eyeing a pair of Nikes whilst we looked on silently agreeing the man liked to shop. “I reckon by the time we leave Josh, will have more shopping bags then you” again there was that half smile of his though I think he maybe right as he kept picking them up and putting them down as if fighting the temptation to get them. So we both sat down on the benches because we could tell we where still going to be a while, and I could help but look at his tattoo, I always had apprection to a good tattoo but he bought it up closer and I just started tracing the pattern with my finger. “So do you have any tattoos because you seem ti be very drawn to mine, I designed it myself to always remind me not to get lost with everything we have to deal with, as sometimes it feels like you can lose your own identity with dealing with what we have to, and also because fir a while I was lost”. Looking at his face I could see clearly he also had some healed wounds of his own.
“I have a couple but always wanted to expand on them more but I’m fussy and want to go for something that has meaning to me” lifting up my jumper I proceeded to show him my back in the middle of my spine was my tribute to my parents it was three long pale pink roses that had a slight tinge of red tied together by a purple ribbon and then to my right side was a white feather that was tied with the miscarriage ribbon with a single flower that was a bluebell which was blue on one side and pink on the others and underneath it scripted writing of to beautiful for this earth. He was definitely more interested in this tattoo then my first one because his fingers where delicately traceing the feather. I only got it six months ago and after looking online at ideas I decided to go for something simple and a white feather felt just so perfect, as soon as the artist designed it when I said what I wanted and the meaning behind It fell in love with it. “I like the Angel feather one, not that there is anything wrong with the roses but there seems to be a hidden story with this one am I correct and am I also correct in assuming that it’s something you have not shared with anyone yet”. “How did you guess that and yes your right my back has become a memorial piece in effect I suppose”, “I guessed because you seem to hold great meaning in simple meaning, everyone wants to have the most bad ass of ones that go in and out of fashion, when really simplicity can give such a more powerful message than some of the most of alaborate of designs”. “It’s the same in many over of areas of life you could date a person who will want the most of grandest and expensive of gifts going, whilst some that would take more joy of something more smaller because of the significance of it, and less is more in so many ways”. After finally deciding he had enough of tracing the design he gently pulled my t-shirt back down and just gave me this reassuring pat as if to say he knew there was something that hurt but it was all going to be okay. Josh had finally given into temptation but had two pairs of trainers that he was buying we both looked at each other and rolled our eyes.
Shopping continued in very much the same fashion we had managed to but new clothes work clothes as Uncle Scott called them, which where T-shirts, zip up hoodies and black combat trousers. Everyday clothes proved to be more of a challenge only because I knew what I liked and I couldn’t find much to my style. Josh reassured me he could buy stuff online at a later date and get them delivered to a parcel drop of point. So I settled for in the short term three pairs of flared jeans, I never liked straight leg and was not a fan of skinny jeans or jeggings, and found a few nice black gypsy style tops that had nice flared sleeves, I was so happy to find fluffy Disney pjs with T-shirts as they where very similar to the ones I had at home. We had also managed to get all new bedding, towels, a new lamp shade, Ipad and a new Iphone. I couldn’t believe how kind he was being as much as I knew he was happy to do this and was my uncle, he really didn’t have any obligation to do this there was also an agreement that the new devices where to be set up with him as I had to wait until I knew that I had disappeared to everyone. There was one thing that upset me as I was never allowed to go back to my home and there was two things I desperately wanted to have back. One was my favourite teddy bear that I had from childhood it was a care bear cousin and was my favourite Brave heart bear. I remember getting him for Christmas one year mum and dad must have watched that film so many times with me every Sunday afternoon, but they never complained and would sit with my whilst I would get all excited when they did the care bear stare and would bounce up and down and clap my hands together. The last was one single picture that I had kept in this ornate biscuit tin I had got one year that once held Danish butter cookies but now held my baby in. I only had that picture and I may have kept looking at it but I just needed to see them. In away I was so afraid that I would forget them or that they would think I never truly cared for them even though there weren’t here I just had so many what ifs. There would be times I would be walking down the street and I would see a mother with her child and I would just wonder who they would have been, would they have looked like me what colour would there eyes have been just wanting to pretend I could see them with this beautiful smile on there face just looking up at me as if waiting to be pulled into the biggest hug where I would just kiss there cheek whilst they would laugh at how silly mummy was.
Josh decided he wanted to go and check out the aftershaves and some more designer styles clothes for himself and Akechetah tagged along as well wanting to check out something’s as well. Scott held out his arm and I linked mine through whilst both of us held numerous bags from our shopping expedition “How about we grab a coffe and get you that cookie i promised because you been a good little girl” laughing “hardly call myself a little girl I’m twenty four but hell yeah I want my cookie” so we made our back down to the ground floor and Scott got his phone out letting them no where we would be. We found a quaint little independent coffee shop which looked more homely instead of everything behin behin glass counters. Baked goods where all displayed on the counter top in cake stands with glass lids and had on a chalk board advertising there specials for the day and when I saw crème brûlée latte my eyes lit up and clearly Scott noticed this so ordered two and my cookie that was in a bag to go and saw a glint of mischievousness in his eyes looks like he was going to be winding someone up. He clocked me and raised his eyebrow up as if admitting he had a plan and just smiled, we made our way to a table in the corner. The atmosphere was nice and tranquil and the lighting wasn’t overbearing, I could quite happily sit in her for an afternoon reading.
“Thank you for the coffee also thanks for buying me everything I still feel guilty though are you sure I can’t pay you back”, he was just about to take a sip but placed his glass back down “ I don’t want the money back your family thing of it as belated birthday and Christmas presents, also as a thank you for giving me memories that I will be able to treasure for the rest of my life as I have really enjoyed this afternoon and never thought I’d ever have this opportunity”.
We then proceeded to enjoy our drinks and I’ve got to admit the taste was amazing, it wasn’t to sickly sweet and I decided for once just to actually enjoy this moment myself I had missed spending time like this with Mum and Dad and wished I could just have one more moment like this with them. Maybe fate had decided to grant my wish but not In the way I had hoped for, Scott then picked his phone up and looked a bit of unsure how to ask but I could sense what he wanted to ask so I just nodded. Holding the phone with his right hand we leaned in closer and looked at the image that was displaying both putting on a genuine happy smile and then in a blink of an eye the moment was now immortalised for all of eternity. Looking at his phone he seemed happy and then saved it and placed it on the table looking as if he had just won the lottery. Both of us just sat in a peaceful silence just savouring the moments we had been blessed with. After finishing our drinks, we proceeded to walk back to the map whilst I was wondering if Josh was suddenly going to appear with bags full of clothes. Scott then handed me my cookie and it was just a chocolate chip cookie but I could see a bit of caramel in it as well. I was just about to take a mouthful when the two announced there arrival “hey where’s my cookie” “sorry mate that was the last one” but Scott had to stop from trying to laugh. They came closer and I was shocked to the core no additional bags thank god I didn’t place a bet as clearly I would of lost. Then Akechetah made a move for my cookie so I went into instant defense mode and turned my back to him trying to take a bite before I lost it. It was no good he grabbed me around the waist with one arm whilst I held the cookie at arm’s length squealing and giggling. Trying to move out of his grip whilst he pulled me in tighter and trying to reach my arm further from his reach. He eventually succeeded and managed to break off part of the cookie still not letting go of my waist, until I finally managed to free myself whilst my Uncle was watching us. Fully out of his hold now I ate the last bit savouring the taste and how even now the chocolate in it was still gooey.
We all agreed to make our way to the toilets as there would be a long drive home thankfully we didn’t have to walk to far it was in the corner of the shopping outlet. As I was walking to the door of the ladies this man just barged into me and the stench that came from him was repulsive. It was like rotting diseased flesh and just as about I was about to say a snide remark I looked at his face he even looked filthy beady narrow eyes a few scratches on his face slight facial stubble. He just glared at me and I could have sworn sniffed around me and he picked up a scent his eyes changed from a blackish cool to a fiery yellow but not that of a normal person. The hairs on my neck rose and goose bumps appeared on my arms as if an arctic breeze had just appeared out of nowhere. He then looked ahead and had this puzzled look and signalled someone or some people off in the distance. I made a hasty retreat into the loo thankfully there where cubicles vacant running into one I closed the door and bolted it shut. That guy was definitely giving off serial killer vibes and the stench from him made mo so nauseous and I know that smell from somewhere but at this moment I couldn’t place it. After taking care of what I needed to do I unlocked the door and looked at cautiously and made my way to wash my hands the hand dryer made me jump no how matter how loud you know it will be it still can take you off guard. Also It didn’t help I was very much on edge and hyper aware of everything that was around me and it felt like I could hear so much more even the dripping from the tap sound as if it was in surround sound. Taking a deep breath in to try and calm myself knowing it was useless this feeling would not shift, I walked back out and looked the man was gone but nothing sat right, walking over to join the rest of the group I kept looking around me.
Scott sensed that something was off with me and raised one eyebrow with a look of pure puzzlement and I just mouthed can we go now. He then started to look around and I’m not sure if he saw anything but he was pretty much rushing us out and into the car park but instead of keeping to the open areas we where weaving between anything that could shield us and Scott and Akechetah also changed from there calm behaviour and I was put in the middle with Akechetahs hand on my waist but in a protective manner they rarely looked over there shoulders but instead where intently checking reflections in any surface. The lights flashed as we came to the van and in the blink of an eye the door was opened I was being pulled in and the rest also got in and closed and looked the door. Josh lifted up the seats I couldn’t believe it there was a secret compartment all the shopping was stowed away and the seats closed back up. Scott grabbed me by the shoulders “What did you see, I need to know this is serious” “ this guy walked into me and he sniffed me and his eyes changed colour, there was something about him it just weirded me out”. Looking me dead in the eyes “. I need you to be calm there was a tracking party in there looking for game, and they’ve caught your scent so are now more interested in a fight, so we going to go back roads we can’t lead them back to our base and we are going to need to weapon up as they are tracking us and will attack”. Starting to feel sick but I couldn’t really think Scot was opening up the box and they where pulling out leather belts. Akechetah had already belted himself up and was sliding a dagger onto his left side and grabbed an axe that must have been double headed. He was then fitting a belt on me and he was grabbing a dagger and sliding it into the loop and put what must have been my axe on the seat. I felt like I wasn’t really present when this was happening more that I was watching as a third party and it was fantasy instead of reality. There where distress flares we where all bent handed and I copied what they where doing and out in my combat trousers. Josh then unlocked the van and got in the and we all took to our seat and buckled in. The engine roared to life and this time there was no radio just utter silence and we drove off. Scott was explaining how to hold the axe and that for impact I needed to put force into it reassuring me the blade was sharp and would cut through anything and reminding me to have an open grip as well for a better swing. Scott was going to team with Josh and I was with Akechetah.