Abandoned Hope Unforgettable Faith

Chapter 6 Fated

ANDIE'S POV

By the time we had made it back to what I assumed was the pack house I started to regain consciousness. Jackson still held me in his arms as we walked into the foyer. Warm sparks spread across every surface of my skin where he touched me. As kind and gentle as he has been to me I can not shake the conditioned instinct to not trust him. Amaya was right, the Moon Goddess could very well just being playing a cruel game. I have done nothing to deserve mercy and I have done nothing to deserve to be loved by anyone let alone my mate.

The elevator doors opened just before we reached them as Nana and several people I did not recognize rushed out.Jackson had barely set me down before Nana pulled me into her arms squeezing what little wind I had left out of me. The other people stopped short of my mate, eyeing me with worry suspicion and I thought I caught a glimpse of what looked to be relief in their eyes.

"Kid you scared me half to death and I am already three quarters of the way there. I do not need you shortening what I have left," Patricia snapped as she pulled away from me.

"I'm sorry Nana. I didn't mean to worry anyone. I don't know what happened."

"Maybe I can offer some you some answers," an older gentleman's grated voice said from behind making me jump.

"Dr. Pritchard, thank you for coming back I am sorry to have called you out so early," Jackson said from beside me as he turned to face the new comer.

"It is no problem at all Alpha it isn't that early anyways." the new comer, Dr. Pritchard, said.

"Wait. Wait did he just say Alpha?" I squeaked out before I could stop myself. Everyone turned to face me but I stared at Jackson in confusion.

"Oh my Goddess I am such a fool. I have been so caught up with what just happened that I forgot we have not been properly introduced," Jackson groaned, swiping his hand down his face, "I am Jackson Blacketer Alpha of the Oaks River Pack. This is my father and mother, Jefferson and Julliana, my Beta Rowan, my Gamma Braydon, and this is Dr. Pritchard.

"I guess you probably already know who I am," I looked away, suddenly ashamed that they all know that I caused all of this, "But my name is Alexandra. It is nice to meet all of you and I am so sorry for causing any problems. I appreciate your care but I think it is best that I leave."

"No, that was not what was agreed between us," Jackson stepped towards me and I shied back.

"What was agreed upon was between you and Amaya not me. I don't belong here and you do not deserve me as your mate after my wolf tried to kill you," I couldn't even meet his eyes as I said it.

"Amaya has given you the chance to stay why won't you accept it?"

"Because she is only using you! If she gets stronger then there is nothing stopping her from exacting her vengeance on anyone or everyone. She is dangerous and I can't let her hurt anyone here especially after the kindness you have shown me," I shouted.

"Then let her use me, but I can't lose you. I want you as my mate Alexandra. I want you as my Luna. powerful wolf or not the Moon Goddess gave me you and I don't want you to take that from me," Jackson sighed looking discarded.

"Why?" was all I could muster out.

"Because you are wrong Alexandra. I may not know everything that has happened but I do know that if anyone is undeserving of a mate it is me."

"That is enough from both of you," Nana said as she stepped between the two of us, "Neither of you are less deserving of the other. Andie this man has not left your side from the moment he laid eyes on you and has defended you before you even woke up. Before he knew who you were or who Amaya was. Jackson, she is not pure either. Yes it may have happened under different circumstances but she did choose to stay with the bastard you and your Beta encountered. Neither of you is innocent but you both deserve the mate the Moon Goddess fated you too.

"She is absolutely right," Alpha Jefferson added standing next to his son and placing his hand on his shoulder.

I look between the two of them in confusion then at my mate who met my gaze only briefly before looking down at the floor. For an Alpha it's hard to imagine he'd be ashamed for not waiting until he found me before he slept around. It's hard to believe any man werewolf or not would regret sleeping around before find their forever partner. I swallow back the bile rising in my throat before I say what I know he has to be thinking.

"He doesn't have to be with me.... he can reject me," I look towards Jackson who meets my gaze again, horror etched on his face, "I mean I wouldn't blame you i..."

A resounding slap silenced everyone in the foyer. I held my stinging cheek as a growl vibrated from my lips.

"Do not growl at me child. You are making a fool of yourself," Nana glared at me. Never once since I've known her have I ever seen her lay a hand on anyone but she did now, "Rejection is not a solution you throw around lightly. There are consequences."

"I think that there has been enough discussion for now," Dr. Pritchard stepped in trying to divert the tension, "I need to take Ms. Alexandra to be reevaluated at the hospital and I am sure there is plenty that needs to be taken care of here. Or did you plan on continuing to have this discussion in front of the rest of the pack?"

It was only then that we all realized that we were still standing in the foyer, other pack memebers were awkwardly milling about trying to continue with their tasks but listen in on the conversation as well. They all sheepishly nodded their heads before scattering in different directions out of the main entrance.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to make a scene," I say softly lowering my gaze to the floor.

"The doctor is right. It is best we discuss this later privately," Jackson's father said, "Ms. Alexandra if it is okay with you it would be best if the doctor evaluated you further to make sure you are healing well. While you are at the hospital we have plenty to take care of here."

I knew he meant the damage Amaya caused breaking through the window and the pack members who over heard our conversation. I bow my head respectfully to him before turning to follow the doctor. Heat and sparks kissed my arm when Jackson grabbed it before quickly letting go. Part of me wish he hadn't.

"What would you like for breakfast," he asked as I looked into his blue grey eyes.

"I um....," I stumbled, after what I just said his response is wanting to know what I would like for breakfast, "I um... like muffins."

"Stop being stupid Alexandra," Nana groaned, "Jackson, she is obsessed with warm blueberry muffins with butter on them. I am more than happy to help in the kitchen this morning anyways."

With that she trudged off towards the direction of what I only assumed was the kitchen. The rest of the group stood staring after her for a moment before Brayden clapped his hands together and wrung them out, "Welp, that takes care of her but the rest of us probably ought to get going as well." He elbowed Rowan in the ribs and the both headed towards the elevator.

"Ms. Alexandra, I will be at the hospital when ever you are ready to come by but I will recomend you swing by sooner rather than later," Dr. Pritchard nodded to everyone, "Alphas, Lunas, I will see you later."

Jackson's parents looked between me and him but I glued my eyes to the floor. There's no way they like me now especially after everything that's just happened. Of all the awful first impressions I'm sure they've seen I can guarantee that I am the worst. First I almost killed their son then I wrecked their home and to top it all off I offered for their son to reject me. Today can't get any worse and it's only six-thirty.

"Son," his father started, "for today let me handle the pack. You and Alexandra need to spend time with each other and get to know each other."

"Father, I appreciate your concern but you really don't need to do that."

As soon as the words left Jackson's mouth my heart plummeted. I feared I would be sick on the spot.

"I told you, Andie, he doesn't want you," Amaya lashed at me and deep down I started to believe she is right.

JACKSON'S POV

"Father, I appreciate your concern but you really don't need to do that," I stated but there was no force behind my words and my father knew it.

"Non sense. If you and Alexandra want any kind of relationship you need to start somewhere and now is the time," my mother voiced her opinion.

"Jackson I ran this pack long before you did. I know how to do this job. Take care of your mate son. She and her wolf might not want to admit it yet but you need each other," my father concluded before taking my mom's hand and heading towards the elevator.

"Take care of her son. Powerful wolf or not that girl needs to know what it truly means to be loved and I know I raised you to be the right man to prove it to her," was the last thing he said to me over mind link before the elevator doors closed.

Sighing heavily I turn back towards Alexandra who stood starting at the the ground wringing her fingers. I barely caught the reflection of light off of a tear that fell to the ground at her feet.

"Now you've done it you moron," Logan huffed in my head, "She thinks we hate her and I can't blame her."

"S.h.i.t...," I groaned internally. I never meant to make her cry. After she said she wanted me to reject her I didn't think she really wanted me around so I was going to give her space but now she's crying and it's my own damn fault.

"Alexandra...," I reached hesitantly for her hand, "I don't hate you and I want to spend the day with you if you'll have me."

She looks up at me her cinnamon honey hair falls in front of the left side of her face. Her almond eyes the color of rich mocha, were puffy from the tears that slipped past her gaurd. Her small nose was delicately upturned. She was small no more than five foot three if that. Her limbs and torso were frail and thin as if she ate only enough to live. How I longed to hold more that just the tips of her fingers again. I could feel the sparks emanating from her up my arm making Logan purr.

"Jackson... you don't really want me. I know that please don't feel like you have to do this to make everyone else happy," She tried to pull her hand away but I held on to it firmly but not aggressively.

"But I do want you. I want to show you that you are safe and that nothing can hurt you anymore Alexandra please. If you decide that you don't want me by the end of the week then I swear to you that I won't force you into anything but give me a chance. All I ask is that if you do choose not to be with me please stay in the pack. I won't bother you but I want to know you are safe. Please just give me a chance," I begged nearly falling to my knees. She has no idea how much control she has over me.

"Okay...," She said quietly.

"Thank you. If you would like I'll take you up stairs and show you where you can shower."

"But I don't have any clothes."

"I'll have one of the maids bring something up for you."

"I don't want to bother anyone though. You've already done so much and all I've done is break your balcony doors and almost kill you."

"I've been wanting to get new doors anyways," I joked, hoping to make her feel better but all she did was hang her head again.

"Beloved there is nothing to feel bad for."

She glanced up at me and nodded her head shyly. Goddess what I would give to make her feel less afraid even if it were for only a moment. I carefully lead her towards the elevator and pressed the button for our floor. As soon as the elevator starts moving she let out a small startled gasp and clung desperately to the railing around the wall.

"She's afraid of elevators?" I could almost see Logan tilting his head in confusion at the sight of our mate. I carefully and slowly scooted closer to her to where I could feel the warmth of her body near mine. She didn't open her eyes but she loosened her grip on the rail enough so blood flow returned to her fingers. The elevator pinged as the doors opened to the Alpha floor. I never knew someone could get off an elevator so fast until Alexandra rushed out the open doors straight across the hallway bracing herself against the wall.

"Are you okay?" I asked stepping off as well.

"Yeah, elevators just aren't my thing."

"Hights or cramped spaces?"

"Little of both I guess. Just not a fan of plummeting to my death in a metal box."

"Makes sense. Your room is this way down the hall," I motioned for her to follow not missing the slight flinch she did when my hand moved. "Whatever she has been through she's still recovering from," I thought to myself as I lead her down the hall to the room across from mine.

I open the door to what used to be my older brothers room. No one has stayed in here since he died five years ago in a raid on a rogue pack that had been terrorizing our pack and neighboring packs. The rogues had dispersed at the time but as of these last few weeks they have began to reorganize. Though the reason is still unknown, we are doing everything we can to prevent another round of bloodshed.

"It's beautiful...," Alexandra's soft voice broke me from my thoughts and I look at the room for the first time in five years. Everything had changed.

The once grey walls were now a beautiful matte blue with white accented trim and curtains. The California King bed now had clean blue and white bedding. The floor was white oak and buffed to shine. The small fire place sat across from a white sectional sofa with a T.V. on the mantel. A vanity set sat along the wall by the door. It really was beautiful but there was a small pang in my heart seeing that my bothers room was no longer his.

"My mother decided that until you and I had time to get to know each other you'd feel better in your own room. She had everyone work on it the moment she found out you were coming here," I said guiding her into the room but leaving the door open behind me.

"She didn't have to go through all of that trouble," Alexandra said, spinning in a slow circle taking everything in.

"Well the room has been empty for years now and it's nice to know that someone can enjoy it. Over here is the closet," I said changing the subject and opening the door, "When you feel up to it my cousin Clara would love to take you shopping."

"I don't have a lot of money and there's no way I can fill this whole space with clothes," Alexandra said eyeing the large walk in closet.

"Don't worry about that. Here you don't have to worry about money anymore. Your are my mate and Luna if you choose to be and what is mine is yours," I gently place my hand on her shoulder enjoying the sparks before she jumps and turns to face me, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to startle you."

"No it's okay it isn't your fault," She looked down at the floor.

"What's wrong my beloved?"

"You are too kind to me. I have done nothing to deserve this," she gestured to the whole room.

"Alexandra you deserve more than what I could ever offer you so it is I who is undeserving of you."

She looks at me with her beautiful eyes at a loss of what to say.

"Um... anyways this door over here is the bathroom. I'll let you freshen up and I'll have someone bring you clean clothes. Whenever you are ready I will just be across the hall okay?" I motioned to my door across the hall.

"Okay," She whispered and I turned to leave, "hey Jackson," She said timidly grabbing my hand from behind surprising me, "I just... I mean... You really... I mean thank you. Thank you for all you are doing for me."

"Anything for you beloved," I smile and she smiles softly back, "I'll be just across the hall when you are ready," and I turned and left the room shutting her door as I left.

ANDIE'S POV

I watched Jackson leave before turning to look around the room one last time. I can't believe he did all of this just for me. How much money was spent doing this? Why did he look sad when he saw it? Did he not like that I have a room to myself without him? He did say no one has lived in here for five years, but from what little I understand he's only been Alpha for a few years. Who lived here before me?

So many thoughts bounce around my head as I make my way around the room. Finally I make my way to the door that Jackson said was the bathroom and when I open it I swear my jaw hit the ground. Beautiful marble floors and counter tops glistened in the lighting. The sink sat along the wall to the right with several drawers and a small stool that fit neatly under the counter. To the left was the shower that was built into the wall. There were so many nozzles that I couldn't even begin to imagine what each one did. Along the back wall was an elegant Victorian clawfoot tub with gold inlay on the feet and sides.

Heaving a sigh of relief, I carefully walked over to the tub admiring the craftsmanship. I turn the water on and let it warm before plugging the drain. While the tub filled with water I slipped out of the Basketball shorts and baggy shirt Jackson hand given me after I shifted back. Amaya has been quiet since the conversation in the foyer. It isn't something that I'm not already used to. Some times I wonder why I was ever given a wolf at all.

Once the tub was full I stepped into the water feeling it burn my skin a little before immersing myself completely. The sensitive raw skin that grew over the many scars across my body ached and burned but I couldn't wash away the amount of disgust I had. No amount of scrubbing could ever wash away the sent of the monsters who did this to me. Maybe Amaya is right. No good could ever come from a man. They're brutes, mongrels, taking what they want when they want. There is no good in them.

Before my thoughts started further down the path I remembered Mr. Hendrickson. A sweet kind old man who had never done anything to hurt anyone. He was kind to me without any ulterior motives. He always treated me with respect and took care of me even if he didn't know me.

"That's because you always looked so pitiful. You are weak and he took pity on you," Amaya's voice broke my thoughts.

"He was kinder to me than you have been," I snap but she already accomplished planting the seed of doubt and guilt.

"You will never be free from this feeling until you confront him. You know that. You will never escape this fear if you keep running. One day he will find you. One day you will have no choice but to face him. Either you will see the world through my eyes or you will die a pitiful meek like girl who accomplished nothing but proving to everyone that women are nothing more than slaves to men," Amaya growled before retreating back into my mind.

Panic grips my heart threatening to crush it. If she's telling the truth.... images of him start flashing through my mind. My scars burn as the memories of how each one came to be cascades over any hope of rational thought. I can feel him on every inch of me. The tub and the bathroom around me is replaced by trees. His menacing laugh echoes around me and I frantically search for where it started.

"behind you little dove," I feel his hot rancid breath against my ear causing me to turn slowly towards his voice.

Our eyes lock and a scream tears from my lips.

JACKSON'S POV

After leaving Alexandra to take shower I called one of the Omegas to bring her some clean clothes. I wish I held her a little longer. I miss the warmth and sparks of her touch. I decide that it would be best to speak with Patricia about what else she knows of Alexandra's past and what happened before she chose to hide as a human.

Entering the kitchen I find Patricia tediously measuring out each muffin to perfection filling each one to the same spot in the liner.

"Ms. Rosenwater," I start.

"It is just Patricia or Pat to you boy. I am not old enough to be a Ms. yet," she scolded not even turning to face me.

"I apologize, Patricia, I was wondering if you knew more about where Alexandra came from and what happened to her before you found her."

"As I have already told you young Alpha I found her collaped on the side of the road five years ago. It was a miracle she was even alive let alone survived shifting into a wolf as massive as Amaya is. Alexandra had been so thin that she is obbese now compared to how I found the poor girl."

I think momentarily of my beloved, picturing her small thin frame she has. She has no muscles and no fat to her. When the doctor weighed her when she was first brought here she only weighed in at ninety-seven pounds. The thought that this is her obsesse makes me shudder.

"I understand that but can you remember anything else. Any thing that indicated where she may have come from who could have hurt her?"

There was a long pause before Patricia finally turned away from the muffins to look at me, "Jamie, do you mind just putting these in the oven for me? Alpha Jackson and I need to talk."

A little omega girl who helps her mom in the kitchen on weekends scurried over to Patricia taking the muffins from her, "Thank you sweetheart. Have your mother let Jackson and I know when they are done. Is there some where quiet we can talk?" Patricia asked as she walked towards the door behind me.

"The chef's office is closest," I said turning to follow her.

Once in the office Patricia sighed heavily sitting down in one of the chairs. The look of defeat etched on her face. This whole time she had been strong and fearless, but in this moment I finally saw just how much all of this had taken a toll on her.

"Amaya did not reveal much of what had happened to Andie. All she told me is what I told all of you already," Patricia said.

"But that wasn't all of it was it?"

"No. When I found Andie on the side of the road she reeked of rogue wolves. She herself smelled like nothing I had ever smelled before. There was one scent she carried from the rogues that I have smelled only a couple of times since the night I found her. It was the most predominant scent. I also saw a wolf chasing the car as we drove away. You must not tell Andie any of this. She has lived her whole life in fear she does not need anything more making it worse," Patricia pinched the bridge of her nose. I could feel her anxiety and concern for my mate hanging in the air.

"There's no telling who was chasing you after you found her or if it is the same werewolf that has come around a few times since then is there?"

"Unfortunately not. I never saw the face and I did not catch the wolf's scent while I drove away."

"But you would know should you smell it again correct?"

"If the brute that hurt Andie is still as rancid as they were in the past then there is no doubt in my mind that I would not be able to identify them," Patricia fixed me with a determined ragefull look.

"Good. I have a feeling that if this rogue couldn't leave well enough alone when Alexandra left, then it is likely they know who she is or they have ulterior motives," I conclude swallowing back the anger I feel bubbling to the surface.

"No one will hurt mate," Logan growled confirmingly.

A knock on the door drew our attention away from the conversation and I looked to Patricia, "We will discuss this further later."

"Very well young Alpha."

I open the door and little Jamie stood there with big doey eyes and she squeaked in surprise when she realized it was me

"Um... Alpha," She said shyly, "Ms. Patricia wanted to know when the muffins were done so you could take them up to the Luna."

"Thank you for coming and getting me. I will gladly come and get them for the Luna right now," I say calmly roughing up Jamie's hair a little with my hand so she wouldn't feel so nervous around me.

"Thank you Miss Jamie. If your mother is okay with it you are welcome to have one of the Luna's muffins. I know she will not mind sharing with you," Patricia cooed coming up behind me as we left the chef's office.

After grabbing the muffins and butter I headed up the elevator with the tray hoping Alexandra will be about ready to eat. Once I reach her door... Justin's old door... I knock three times and wait. No response came. I knocked again and still nothing. Panic began to course through me as I flung open the door disregarding the muffins at the door. The sound of Alexandra screaming hit me like a tidal wave as I rushed towards the bathroom.