will life go on?

Must not should.

i remember this lingering memory of mine where I have been wondering the world through the internet as i always do before going to bed. I heared the knob of bathroom door turning which indicates my husband's shower ending. I shut the laptop screen and carefully got up as i looked at him. He gestured with his hand for me to come over and so I did. I placed my knee on the bed edge while my hand was facing the sheet of the bed right next to him to support me as i get on. I rest my self between his arms as he hugs me with his arm and looks me in the eyes. it was all okay untill he muttered a question.

* i heard you've had a chat today, who was it that you chatted with?* he said in angry tone

I lifted my eyes and saw him raging with anger as he looked at me

*....w..with a friend, at work*

I managed to say the words in fear while averting my eyes away. As i knew, the storm is coming by.

and so as i expected. he pulled my hair in his fist and got his face an inch away from mine as he spoke while gritting his teeth.

*and who said you're allowed to have friends?.whether it's males or females, haven't i told you to not talk or befriend anyone* he said to me in anger as i fel his hot breath hitting against my face. this would later on lead to a cycle of non-stop beating where he would stop because I started bleeding or he got tired of hitting me to much. I had to stay with him and put up with everything.At least, for the sake of my child Tiffany. she was the only permenant delight supporting me during the 10 years of hell after all. i couldn't leave her behind knowing how much of a cruel monster he is. but, I can't take it anymore. I can't believe I'm doing this and I cannot hold on any longer. I'm sorry my child. I wish I was a better mother for you.-------------------------------------------

This was the note my mother had left me. the paper had wet spots traced on it. And red stains apparent on them. I didn't know at the time (as i was 9) what the paper had in it nor what it meant. i held it and went to my parents room pacing happily thinking that my mother left me a congratulations note as she knew I got good marks in school. I wanted her to read it out loud for me as that would stop her tears after hearing father shouting at her. I felt bad as father was always mean to us but we could never retaliate to him as he was stronger. the door was closed and I couldn't reach the knob. i put the note on the ground and I stood on my toes to grab the knob with the tips of my fingers. i fell to the ground without any accomplishments. but I got up again as i felt the urge to have fun with mother. but then....to be continued

-----------------+++++++--------------

I hope you liked the story.Also i would love it if you leave your comments on it for me to view. anyways, wish your all having a great day and peace out.