SILENT STRUGGLES

CHAPTER FOUR

Ewla pov:

Awakening from the relentless pounding in my head, was a familiar aftermath of my emotional tempest of pulling my hair and crying my eyes out. The mild migraine didn’t give me the privilege of noticing the sterile, quiet hospital room I lay in. The murmurs of our manager outside the door were a stark reminder of the turmoil within the company. My dreams of debuting, now seemingly dashed, left me spiraling into self-doubt. Everyone knew how f****d up I was in the company. They would not allow a person like me to debut my dream has crashed. I just had to f**k why am I so useless. Why couldn’t I do anything right? I hated myself, everyone hated me. They knew I was an attention w***e who couldn’t handle her s**t. I hadn’t noticed when I had succumbed to despair and begun pulling at my hair when a gentle intervention halted my self-harm. A beautifully-handsome face, etched with genuine concern, hovered over me before darkness claimed my consciousness.

I knew I would wake up, because I had been through the same again and again. Maybe they were all right. I was just an attention seeker. I hated hospitals and everything in them. I just couldn’t stand them, but somehow, I always found myself lying on the same beds with the intoxicating smell of antiseptic. Maybe I should’ve just resigned myself to this pattern.

The following day, the doctor deemed me fit for discharge, attributing my collapse to sheer exhaustion. The same face i had seen before losing consciousness the previous day was there. "Hey, I’m Latty, I’m a trainee too, the one who called the ambulance. I'm here to pick you up on behalf of the manager. How’re you feeling," she said. She was stunning, standing at 5'8, with a stature that was commanding respect, yet with it carried an air of grace. Her long hair, a cascade of ebony, was styled in a modern mullet cut, the edges sharp and daring, contrasting with the softness of the bun atop her head. The duality extended to her facial features, giving her a harmonious blend of feminine beauty and a striking androgynous charm. Her curves are gentle like waves, not overpowering but perfectly sculpted, speaking to a strength that's both physical and character-driven. Her mixture of Asian and American heritage shined through her delicate features, with eyes that held the depth of the sea and a smile that was both enigmatic and inviting. Dressed in the casual yet iconic Calvin Klein ensemble, she exuded the effortless allure of a model off-duty: confident, relaxed, and utterly captivating.

I didn’t notice I had been ogling her until she said, “Love what you see?” as she handed me my clothes to change into. I was a blushing mess as I made my way to the bathroom to change from the hospital gown. How could she come to pick up a patient looking like a supermodel? Don’t get me wrong. I was used to being ignored, so I never had anyone tell me they liked me to confirm my sexuality. But I could appreciate a fine masterpiece when I saw one. She was one. Unlike the 5’2 me who forever demeaned herself, Latty screamed confidence. Was I meant to be a match for her? After getting changed into a simple short black dungaree dress and a blank polo neck and the same white sneakers I had worn the previous day, I stepped out with my head low to find Latty waiting with a bag I presumed held the remnants of yesterday. She seemed intimidating. Who am I kidding. Even a kid would make me feel intimidated.

After getting the hospital bill cleared, we left. Latty insisted I should eat something, so we headed to Nami's café. She offered to make the order for me, but I’d refused, so we went to make the order together. Strawberry lemonade was my favorite drink and so was lemon cake. I mean who would resist the delightful dance of flavors on the palate? With strawberry lemonade being a refreshing concoction where the tartness of freshly squeezed lemon juice melds seamlessly with the sweetness of ripe strawberries, creating the most heavenly taste. The zesty lemon always providing a vibrant citrus kick, which is softened by the strawberries' summery and fruity essence. Together, they create a beverage that's both invigorating and soothing, often with a slight undertone of floral notes from the strawberries. The taste being like a sunny day in a glass, perfect for sipping and savoring during warm weather, but I would still savor it in cold weather. Call me not a weirdo. I’d take a cupful of ice cubes over ice cream. Sourness being an intrinsic part of my being, an undeniable preference.

Latty's elegance was undeniable even in the simple act of ordering an iced Americano, unlike me who was a stuttering mess even in a café I was used to visiting. As for me, I could only stomach white coffee; anything else was too bitter for my palate. How would one grow accustomed to such bitterness? After placing our orders, we chose seats by the window, which was my preferred spot. It offered a tranquil view and the seclusion of a table meant for two.

“What’s your name? Don’t I deserve to know at least,

“I…I…I’m Ewla I’m sorry”

“Don’t apologize. Where are you from?”

“I’m …fr… from k… Kenya”

“Do you speak Korean?”

“No …. I'm learning though.”

“Hey, don’t stutter. Are you uncomfortable? Or am I just making you nervous? i tend to have that effect on many?”

“No, I’m just not used to speaking to strangers.”

“I’m hurt you consider me a stranger after I saved you.”

“I’m sorry and thank you” as we conversed, Latty’s voice was gentle, and her playful banter removed the awkwardness that seemed to linger in the air.

After some minutes, Nami brought our drinks. “Hey Ewla, you made a friend. If she bugs you too much you can tell me I kick ass for you,” Nami said as she looked at Latty, who was looking at me. “You dare not mislead her. she is an innocent girl. Oh, we are friends. Don’t worry about this dumbass” she completed as she left, leaving the two of us. As we had our coffee, I learned from latty that she loved anime and that her group was to debut in two months. I had fun even as we walked to my dorm room. She was really comfortable to be around as she bid me from apologizing and thanking her.