She Still Wants You

Morning Hangover

Meagan's POV

"Ouch, my head aches. Swear I hate this feeling." talking to myself in my mind, my brain is awake while my eyes were still closed. Then I felt someone move on the bed, I quickly open my eyes in suspicion wondering who it could be. My eyes surprised my mind with what they saw. I had got used to waking up alone in my room, Kae was an occasional exception. 

But now seeing myself wake up next to Oscar in his room and on his bed feels awkward, it reminds me of those days when we were living under one roof. "I miss those but when did I move back into Oscar's apartment?" I get up sitting by the bed side, my heads hurts the more I try to remember how I found myself here. 

"I hate waking up with a hangover, I seriously have to stop drinking liquor." I say to myself after inhaling the scent of alcohol from my bad breathe when I belched. 

I stand and my head feels like its loose and could easily fall off, I get back to siting on the bed. Looking at Oscar, he is in deep sleep. Which makes me wonder what happened last night. 

I challenge myself to stand again after letting out a heavy sigh. I ignore the feeling of dizziness as I heading to the bathroom. 

While rinsing my face I could feel the heaviness of my hangover rolling off my face like wet makeup. I look in the mirror to do my daily 'I am...' affirmation routine. As I repeatedly declared myself to be the ideal version of Meagan I want to be, a thought of my declarations getting me into an awkward moment with Oscar crosses my mind.The thought feels vivid like it is a memory or a flashback. I look back at the bath tab and a blurry image of me stressing seated by the edge of the tab resurfaced in my mind. It appeared to be more like a portion of a dream. I brush it off getting out of the bathroom.

I head to the kitchen to prepare some breakfast, I could something oily and salty to help me get by with this hangover headache. I go through Oscar's  fridge and kitchen wardrobes looking for ingredients. 

I settle for a quick meal of cabbage - mayonnaise salads as an appetizer, and fried egg sandwiches for the main meal accompanied by some hot coffee. I get the ingredients together to start preparing the meal. 

"OC!, yo OC!," I heard Joel's voice coming from the front door. "He is still sleeping!" I shouted going to open the door, to my surprise I find Joel a few steps already inside coming to the kitchen. "Oh, we slept with the door open." I said out my assumption. "Nah, I used Oscar's key to come in. He was wasted last night and so I did the favour. Otherwise you have nothing to worry about, Mac; by the way how are you getting by with your hangover?" Joel said coming to the kitchen. 

Joel is mirthful and free spirited, he is always in a high mood. He is like a brother in law with the way he treats me, like Oscar and I have been married for years.  

"Oh, I woke up with a headache, but it is slowly fading. How about you?" I reply as I go back to cutting the cabbage. "Am good, just feeling a lil tired, aay I came at the right time." Joel said following me into the kitchen. He starts serving himself juice and a sandwich. "Oh and here are Oscar's keys before I forget 'em." He said putting the keys on the table. "Hey what happened last night? I can't seem to  remember how I found myself here." I asked queerly."Uuuhhm, s**t was crazy, you were both hella drunk..." Joel replied with food in his mouth, he quickly swallows it with the aid of juice."You guys had some fight and you were both complaining to me like am the judge and shit." He said taking more slices of bread. Joel's reply reminds me of the de javu I had in the bathroom. Which urges me into asking for more detail. 

"What were we fighting about?" I asked while carelessly pouring the mayonnaise in the bowl of cabbage. 

"Mmmm, I didn't really get the whole story buh you were saying something about engaging and s**t like life time commitments." Joel said before taking a big bite of his bread. 'Oh craps, my affirmations did get me into a harry situation. I thought it was a bad dream or nightmare. I softly bite my bottom lip, lost in thoughts wondering how much of my frustration did I say out. I go quiet for a while, I even pause in my movement as thoughts crowded my mind. "You were super drunk yesterday, you had called me thinking you were calling Oscar." Joel continued narrating but his voice sounded like background noise as the voices in my head got louder, lost in my thoughts. "Hey Mac,... what's wrong?" Joel calls out when he noticed me freeze, his call wakes me up from my thoughts."What's going on with you guys and freezing? Oscar was also talking about the same s**t happening to him yesterday." Joel's reply sounded somewhat funny."What was Oscar saying?" I asked anxiously waiting attentively for his reply. "You know I think you guys have to go see a marriage counselor or some shrink, you know the s**t y'all white folks like doing... Taking your problems to someone else to solve 'em for you." Joel said refilling his cup. "Yesterday Oscar was complaining that you're stressing him out, and you were also complaining about him not being serious with marrying you. I wonder why y'all white folks like beating around the bush instead of y'all just telling each other what's bothering you and talk it out." Joel's words make me feel like opening up to him, I don't know why now, but I just have a feeling he will understand me better. Besides he is the one who introduced me to Oscar, he knows our relationship better than anyone. "You know the thing is... lately I've been feeling frustrated. Every time I capture a wedding or engagement celebration of a young couple it inspires me to want to do the same. Buh..." I said as I cover Oscar's sandwiches and salads putting them on the side."So you want Oscar to engage you, just cause everyone out there is doing it?" Joel asked wryly.

"Its not like that Jo,... you know me. I am a content and principled person. I don't want Oscar to engage me just cause everyone is getting engaged." I argue Joel's proposed question."If that's not the case then why are you frustrated?" Joel's questions start to feel like a therapy session. "I don't know Jo,... like I just want to do things the right way, you know making things official, putting rings on each other's fingers... I also want that. And lately I had been feeling like..., living together as if we are married yet we are not even engaged is so naive. It is like we are repeating our highschool days. That's why I had to moved out, to find myself and have a clear vision of what I want to see in my relationship. You know thinking of the future and all that." I said looking down into my cup of coffee like I was starring into a fortune teller's magic bowl of visions.

"Oh, I see buh,... buh you could have at least talked to him about it, cause he is probably misinterpret your distance wrongly that's why he is stressing. Y'all ladies should  This could cause more problems?" Joel said calmly with a soft voice. "I will try my best... but I can't say it will be any time soon" I replied looking at Joel feeling much. "You should before things get worse..." Joel said acting like a therapist."Thanks for the talk." I said before taking my plates for rinsing. "Anytime Mac, that's what brothers are for... guess am good at this therapist s**t aay, I should start making some cash off it. What do you think Mac?" Joel said before heading to the leaving room.

"Jo, can you help me talk to Oscar about the engagement thing, you know the therapy thing you did with me." I shout out to Joel as he leaves the kitchen. "That would be 70 bucks for a session..., lemme go check on him before I bounce." Joel vociferated from the living room. "Yo OC, wake your ass up. You late for work!" Joel shouts as he enters Oscar's room.  

A few minutes later I heard Oscar's voice from the room, and Joel's voice was louder. "Looks like he is finally awake." I say to myself as I quickly clean up the living room. 

They come to the living room, Joel is laughing at Oscar. he looks disorganized like a mad professor that slept on a project at night. Joel is even making fun of him. "Oscar Chansa, the developer. Who can make a game in three days... last night was something else, your man had performed telling people that he is going to make a game or cartoon for them..." Joel said laughing at my Oscar. I chuckle as I imagine how Oscar was acting when he was drunk. "Lemmy is looking forward to see you bro. You made his night. He was even asking about you" Joel was enjoying the moment reminding Oscar of last night. 

Oscar started smirking after he saw me in the living room. He probably felt a bit shy when he noticed me, peeping him through my hairs that had fell in front of my face.

Oscar insists on going to take a shower before he start his day. He quickly rushed into the bathroom  Leaving me with joel in the living room. ...."So you'll first tell him then I'll talk to him later to make him understand." Joel said as he walked to me when Oscar went to bath.

"But not today, let me first think it through." I replied as I resume arranging the printed photos together."That's for you to decide Mac, just make it quick before yesterday's drama repeats itself. Next ammo charge y'all for a marriage counselling session." Joel said as he takes a seat. "..., alright I will do likewise." I chuckle at his words before replying.

Weeks later .......