Summer Love’s Second Chance

Chapter 2

“And who made it that way?!” Charlie let out a silent scream. “You have got to be kidding me right now. You said you had to have your home here. Someone had to be here to run things. The kids needed a stable home to live in. You said I needed to stay here which is why I chose teaching as a career instead of getting a remote job. I planted myself here because you said I had to; for our future.” Charlie got up and began to walk out the door.

“Where are you going? It’s 3 am. Just come to bed and we can talk about this later,” Kevin begged.

“I would rather sleep outside than anywhere near you,” Charlie growled. “Let me ask you one thing, does marriage mean anything to you. Do those vows we said have any hold over your conscience?”

“I already told you that they didn’t mean anything. They were just a quick f**k to get me through until I got home.” Kevin pleaded.

“And that’s supposed to make it better? That’s supposed to make it hurt less?! I just can’t. I can’t be here right now. And don’t you dare follow me!” Charlie stormed out the door, down the steps, and out onto the street in her neighborhood.

The night was cold and the moon was bright hanging low in the sky. Finally hot tears began to roll down her cheeks. Charlie looked up at the moon, “What did I do to ever deserve this? What did I do wrong? What could I have done better to make him love me right?” She began to quietly sob as she walked down her street. There weren’t many street lights out here so it was hard to see where she was going when the moon was behind the trees. There weren’t many sounds out as it was winter, cold, and super early in the morning. There was no traffic because they lived in the country. Their house sat on 10 acres and each of their neighbors had the same amount of land so the houses were spaced a bit.

Charlie stopped when she made it to the stop sign. She sat in the grass on the corner and just sobbed. She allowed all her pain and sorrow to flow from her body and into the earth around her. Charlie looked up at the moon again and said “God, please. If this was not supposed to be my happily ever after, what is my purpose here? Why can’t I be happy and be loved ever?”

Charlie was referring to the trauma she suffered as a child. She was the oldest of 4 children growing up to a single mother. She herself acted like a mother to her younger siblings most of the time since her mom worked multiple jobs to keep them afloat. The first time her world came crashing down was when she was 18 years old and during a family fight, her mother declared that everything that their family suffered was Charlie’s fault. If Charlie had never been born, her mother could have gone to college and the whole family could have had a better life. Her father would have never left them. Charlie was to blame for everything. The argument got to a point where her mother told her that her grandmother begged her mother to abort her. “But I made a mistake allowing you to live, you’ve done nothing but make this whole family miserable!” Her mother had shouted.

After being a role model, straight A student who also worked and helped around the house, that kind of information rocked Charlie to her core. She thought she had been a good daughter and acted as a second mom at home cooking, cleaning, and caring for her siblings. But it turned out that was never enough. Her very existence was a burden.

Charlie had moved out that night to live with her Aunt, vowing to never speak to her mother again. She finished high school, graduating number 4 in her class, attended college and got a bachelor’s degree in Early Childhood Education. She met her now husband one night at a college party where some of the guys had brought their engineer buddies from the neighboring technical university. Kevin had spent the whole night following Charlie around like a puppy. They started dating the next weekend and the rest was history. Who would have thought that 10 years after they first met, their world would come crashing down. So much time, now wasted.

It seemed to Charlie that she just couldn’t win in life. She could try her hardest, be the best at something, help anyone and everyone be successful in reaching their goals, but when it came to her own life, she was doomed to lead a life of tragedy. It just didn’t seem very fair to her.

“If you have a greater purpose for my life, God, please share it with me. I don’t see how I can continue living my life if I have to face one more disappointment, one more time when someone who is supposed to love me, or who says they love me, stabs me in the heart and then blames me for bleeding. I just want to be at peace. I don’t even really need to be happy. I just want to be at peace,” Charlie begged.

Just then, a car passed by her, the headlights lighting up the street like daylight. The car slowly backed up and the window rolled down. “Hey, miss, are you alright? Do you need help?” The driver looked worried like he had just stumbled upon something from a horror movie and he needed to be the one to help her or she’d die.

“I’m fine. I don’t need any help, thank you. I was just going for a walk and had a moment. I need to head home now anyway. Thank you for your concern.” Charlie nodded and waved hoping he would leave so she could be a lone a little while longer before going home.

“Alright, miss. If you’re sure you’re ok, I’ll go on, but if you need help, I love at the house on the left at the end of this street.please come knock on my door, I’ll make sure you get the help you need,” the man said.

“Thank you.. umm..” she wasn’t sure who she was talking to. Although they had lived in this neighborhood for 8 years, she’d never really met or hung out with the neighbors.

“Tom, the name’s Tom. My wife and I can help keep you safe if you find yourself in danger.” He nodded to her and then slowly continued to drive down the road.

There were rarely people who wanted to do things for her, so she kept his offer in mind for in case she would need it in the near future. She got up and brushed herself off, wiping her eyes and turned to head home. She didn’t want to go there and have to face him, but it was Christmas Day, and the kids’ Christmas should not be ruined just because their father was a man-***** who couldn’t control his d**k.

Her emotions were beginning to change from denial to anger. She was slowly becoming angry at him for putting her family through this and then expecting her to let it slide like nothing ever happened and have them move on. All the way back to the house her anger stewed until she was ready to explode, but she had to keep herself calm for the kids. She could never allow them to see what their father had done to her. She would never let them see her be weak because she had been their anchor all these years and needed to remain that way.