Chapter 9
Michael's POV
Rebecca and I ended up talking about work a little more before she asked me a question that caught me by surprise.
“Michael, who is it that you like?” I almost chocked on my red wine but looked at her face and she was genuinely curious. I sighed.
“She’s someone I’ve been in love with since College.” I saw her brows furrow, going over every girl we knew in college. There was a lot, mostly Chris’s friends but I knew most of them. She began to reel of names and most of them I genuinely looked at her as if she was crazy.
“I honestly can’t think of anyone you liked in college. You even hated me and Chris.” She laughed and I choked back a chuckle at this. They were annoying but I loved them both dearly.
“It doesn’t matter Becks. She’s someone out of my league, she’s in love with someone else and always has been. I’m not worth her time either, but she’ll always hold a special place in my heart and until she’s gone from there, I can’t bring myself to be with anyone else.”
“Does she know?” She asked, sadness clear on her face and it made me frown.
“I told her one night, but she was extremely drunk. We shared a kiss, and I don’t think she ever remembered it. She was still in love with this other guy, and they were pretty much destined to be together.”
“That’s so sad that she doesn’t remember. Maybe if you told her sober, she might have realised she was with the wrong guy?” Becca asked again, sipping her sweet wine.
“Neh, she told me she had been in love with him since she was small and that they were getting married so…” I trailed off.
“Are they married?” I just shrugged. She looked at me and smiled. “I’m sure you’ll move on eventually.” I shrugged again. She smiled and suddenly got up and opened her balcony doors. She beckoned for me to follow her and pulled out a cigarette packet.
“What?!” I asked, shocked.
“I have them here in case you ever came over and needed a cheeky one, sometimes I also light one up for a few puffs or to just smell them.” She answered a little meekly. Again, guilt coursed through me, she kept them here in case I ever came over. But I never did. I honestly thought she only tolerated me for Chris’s sake but maybe I was wrong.
“I didn’t realise I was welcome without Chris!” I answered honestly, lighting one of the cigarettes. “Ive always enjoyed your company, but I felt weird if Chris wasn’t there.”
“Really? I didn’t think you’d want to hang with me without Chris either. I thought you just put up with me.” Rebecca laughed. “We’re just a pair of idiots, I guess. In more ways than one…” I saw her suddenly go sad and I passed her the lit cigarette. She took a few puffs and gave it me back.
“Rebecca.” I said, causing her to look at me funny because I used her full name. “You are not an i***t; you love who you love. There's nothing wrong with that. Maybe Chris is the i***t for not fighting harder for you. Maybe Chris is the i***t for not realising or maybe were just a teensy bit silly for not opening our mouths sooner.” I said, looking into her eyes. Her eyes softened and I couldn’t tear away my gaze.
“So still idiots…” She said after a while and laughed. “Thanks Michael, you always look out for me.” She said and I wanted to grab her there and then, but I didn’t. She stepped forwards and seemed to second guess herself before finally kissing my cheek. “Sorry, I know you hate being touched but I needed to do that.” She smiled and headed back inside as I finished my cigarette. I stared out over the balcony into the slowly approaching darkness of night. Yes, I hated being touched, but not by her, never. I knew I closed my eyes, blocking out thoughts that were swirling through my head. I stubbed out the cigarette and headed back inside, closing the doors. Rebecca was filling up our glasses, so she clearly intended me to stay a little longer. I walked up behind her and grabbed my glass from around her, leaning down to whisper in her ear.
“I don’t like being touched, but you don’t count Becks. You never have.” I pulled away and went to sit back down. I needed her to know she was an exception to every rule I had.
Rebeccas POV
My heart was beating incredibly fast. Michael had smelt like cigarettes but also a faint muskiness was there too, not sweaty but masculine. I had heard him come in but not realised he was behind me. He was extremely close to me, and my breath caught in my throat. Then I had heard him whisper in my ear and it sent chills down my spine. Something I had ever thought I would experience from him, something I knew I shouldn’t feel for him when I loved his brother. A feeling of lust and wondering.
He didn’t mind if I touched him. That was new. Or was it? Had I just got it into my head because of how he was with everyone else. After all, we had just admitted we liked each other’s company without Chris and were both idiots for thinking we only tolerated each other. Had I imagined all those times? Then I remembered every night I was wasted through college or even after. I had always ended up in bed or somewhere safe, and I knew Chris hadn’t done that and I knew Michael had looked after me. Had he always carried me? Not just ushered me.
I sat down with my wine glass, completely baffled. Michael was looking at his phone and I looked at him closely. He looked exactly like Chris except for his eyes which were greyer and darker than Chris’s bright blue ones. Michael also looked tougher whereas Chris was like a puppy dog.
Why was I comparing them? Sure, I had thought of Michael as handsome many times but never thought of him as more than just Chris’s twin, a friend sure, but nothing more. I bit my lip when I noticed him tilt his head slightly at a text he must be reading. He did that when he was intrigued by something, and it made me smile.
“Everything ok?” I asked. He nodded and looked up at me.
“Yeah, just Chris. I need to be getting going though.” He downed his glass of red wine and got up to head out. I jumped up to grab his glass and see him out.
“You're not driving, right?” I asked, worried. He shook his head and smiled. “Good!” I knew he didn’t live far from me, but I knew he drove to work a lot.
“Well, this was nice, thanks Becks.” He said, smiling as I reached to open the door for him.
“Yeah, we should hang out more often, and you're always welcome if you bring muffins.” I joked, causing him to chuckle, which always sounded nice from him even if it didn’t happen often. He walked out of the building and smiled at me. He was a lot taller than me, and I smiled up at him. He reached over my shoulder, and I tensed up a little, thinking about his whisper in my ear earlier. I shuddered, but a nice shudder as I thought about it. I looked into his grey eyes, and he stared into mine. As he pulled his jacket from behind me. I didn’t dare move but neither did he, still close and bending down but not pulling his jacket any further away from the peg.
The next thing I knew, he had kissed me on my cheek and was waving goodbye from down the hall. I was stunned. What the hell was that?