Atlas Nightshade

Day 58

"Can you not tell frankly your real reason for wishing to be free

to-night? I will undertake that if you will satisfy even me--a stranger,

without prejudice, and with the habit of keeping an open mind--Dr.

Seward will give you, at his own risk and on his own responsibility, the

privilege you seek." He shook his head sadly, and with a look of

poignant regret on his face. The Professor went on:--

"Come, sir, bethink yourself. You claim the privilege of reason in the

highest degree, since you seek to impress us with your complete

reasonableness. You do this, whose sanity we have reason to doubt, since

you are not yet released from medical treatment for this very defect. If

you will not help us in our effort to choose the wisest course, how can

we perform the duty which you yourself put upon us? Be wise, and help

us; and if we can we shall aid you to achieve your wish." He still shook

his head as he said:--

"Dr. Van Helsing, I have nothing to say. Your argument is complete, and

if I were free to speak I should not hesitate a moment; but I am not my

own master in the matter. I can only ask you to trust me. If I am

refused, the responsibility does not rest with me." I thought it was now

time to end the scene, which was becoming too comically grave, so I went

towards the door, simply saying:--

"Come, my friends, we have work to do. Good-night."

As, however, I got near the door, a new change came over the patient. He

moved towards me so quickly that for the moment I feared that he was

about to make another homicidal attack. My fears, however, were

groundless, for he held up his two hands imploringly, and made his

petition in a moving manner. As he saw that the very excess of his

emotion was militating against him, by restoring us more to our old

relations, he became still more demonstrative. I glanced at Van Helsing,

and saw my conviction reflected in his eyes; so I became a little more

fixed in my manner, if not more stern, and motioned to him that his

efforts were unavailing. I had previously seen something of the same

constantly growing excitement in him when he had to make some request of

which at the time he had thought much, such, for instance, as when he

wanted a cat; and I was prepared to see the collapse into the same

sullen acquiescence on this occasion. My expectation was not realised,

for, when he found that his appeal would not be successful, he got into

quite a frantic condition. He threw himself on his knees, and held up

his hands, wringing them in plaintive supplication, and poured forth a

torrent of entreaty, with the tears rolling down his cheeks, and his

whole face and form expressive of the deepest emotion:--

"Let me entreat you, Dr. Seward, oh, let me implore you, to let me out

of this house at once. Send me away how you will and where you will;

send keepers with me with whips and chains; let them take me in a

strait-waistcoat, manacled and leg-ironed, even to a gaol; but let me go

out of this. You don't know what you do by keeping me here. I am

speaking from the depths of my heart--of my very soul. You don't know

whom you wrong, or how; and I may not tell. Woe is me! I may not tell.

By all you hold sacred--by all you hold dear--by your love that is

lost--by your hope that lives--for the sake of the Almighty, take me out

of this and save my soul from guilt! Can't you hear me, man? Can't you

understand? Will you never learn? Don't you know that I am sane and

earnest now; that I am no lunatic in a mad fit, but a sane man fighting

for his soul? Oh, hear me! hear me! Let me go! let me go! let me go!"

I thought that the longer this went on the wilder he would get, and so

would bring on a fit; so I took him by the hand and raised him up.

"Come," I said sternly, "no more of this; we have had quite enough

already. Get to your bed and try to behave more discreetly."

He suddenly stopped and looked at me intently for several moments. Then,

without a word, he rose and moving over, sat down on the side of the

bed. The collapse had come, as on former occasion, just as I had

expected.

When I was leaving the room, last of our party, he said to me in a

quiet, well-bred voice:--

"You will, I trust, Dr. Seward, do me the justice to bear in mind, later

on, that I did what I could to convince you to-night."

CHAPTER XIX

JONATHAN HARKER'S JOURNAL

_1 October, 5 a. m._--I went with the party to the search with an easy

mind, for I think I never saw Mina so absolutely strong and well. I am

so glad that she consented to hold back and let us men do the work.

Somehow, it was a dread to me that she was in this fearful business at

all; but now that her work is done, and that it is due to her energy and

brains and foresight that the whole story is put together in such a way

that every point tells, she may well feel that her part is finished, and

that she can henceforth leave the rest to us. We were, I think, all a

little upset by the scene with Mr. Renfield. When we came away from his

room we were silent till we got back to the study. Then Mr. Morris said

to Dr. Seward:--

"Say, Jack, if that man wasn't attempting a bluff, he is about the

sanest lunatic I ever saw. I'm not sure, but I believe that he had some

serious purpose, and if he had, it was pretty rough on him not to get a

chance." Lord Godalming and I were silent, but Dr. Van Helsing added:--

"Friend John, you know more of lunatics than I do, and I'm glad of it,

for I fear that if it had been to me to decide I would before that last

hysterical outburst have given him free. But we live and learn, and in

our present task we must take no chance, as my friend Quincey would say.

All is best as they are." Dr. Seward seemed to answer them both in a

dreamy kind of way:--

"I don't know but that I agree with you. If that man had been an

ordinary lunatic I would have taken my chance of trusting him; but he

seems so mixed up with the Count in an indexy kind of way that I am

afraid of doing anything wrong by helping his fads. I can't forget how

he prayed with almost equal fervour for a cat, and then tried to tear my

throat out with his teeth. Besides, he called the Count 'lord and

master,' and he may want to get out to help him in some diabolical way.

That horrid thing has the wolves and the rats and his own kind to help

him, so I suppose he isn't above trying to use a respectable lunatic. He

certainly did seem earnest, though. I only hope we have done what is

best. These things, in conjunction with the wild work we have in hand,

help to unnerve a man." The Professor stepped over, and laying his hand

on his shoulder, said in his grave, kindly way:--

"Friend John, have no fear. We are trying to do our duty in a very sad

and terrible case; we can only do as we deem best. What else have we to

hope for, except the pity of the good God?" Lord Godalming had slipped

away for a few minutes, but now he returned. He held up a little silver

whistle, as he remarked:--

"That old place may be full of rats, and if so, I've got an antidote on

call." Having passed the wall, we took our way to the house, taking care

to keep in the shadows of the trees on the lawn when the moonlight shone

out. When we got to the porch the Professor opened his bag and took out

a lot of things, which he laid on the step, sorting them into four

little groups, evidently one for each. Then he spoke:--

"My friends, we are going into a terrible danger, and we need arms of

many kinds. Our enemy is not merely spiritual. Remember that he has the

strength of twenty men, and that, though our necks or our windpipes are

of the common kind--and therefore breakable or crushable--his are not

amenable to mere strength. A stronger man, or a body of men more strong

in all than him, can at certain times hold him; but they cannot hurt him

as we can be hurt by him. We must, therefore, guard ourselves from his

touch. Keep this near your heart"--as he spoke he lifted a little silver

crucifix and held it out to me, I being nearest to him--"put these

flowers round your neck"--here he handed to me a wreath of withered

garlic blossoms--"for other enemies more mundane, this revolver and this

knife; and for aid in all, these so small electric lamps, which you can

fasten to your breast; and for all, and above all at the last, this,

which we must not desecrate needless." This was a portion of Sacred

Wafer, which he put in an envelope and handed to me. Each of the others

was similarly equipped. "Now," he said, "friend John, where are the

skeleton keys? If so that we can open the door, we need not break house

by the window, as before at Miss Lucy's."

Dr. Seward tried one or two skeleton keys, his mechanical dexterity as a

surgeon standing him in good stead. Presently he got one to suit; after

a little play back and forward the bolt yielded, and, with a rusty

clang, shot back. We pressed on the door, the rusty hinges creaked, and

it slowly opened. It was startlingly like the image conveyed to me in

Dr. Seward's diary of the opening of Miss Westenra's tomb; I fancy that

the same idea seemed to strike the others, for with one accord they

shrank back. The Professor was the first to move forward, and stepped

into the open door.

"_In manus tuas, Domine!_" he said, crossing himself as he passed over

the threshold. We closed the door behind us, lest when we should have

lit our lamps we should possibly attract attention from the road. The

Professor carefully tried the lock, lest we might not be able to open it

from within should we be in a hurry making our exit. Then we all lit our

lamps and proceeded on our search.

The light from the tiny lamps fell in all sorts of odd forms, as the

rays crossed each other, or the opacity of our bodies threw great

shadows. I could not for my life get away from the feeling that there

was some one else amongst us. I suppose it was the recollection, so

powerfully brought home to me by the grim surroundings, of that terrible

experience in Transylvania. I think the feeling was common to us all,

for I noticed that the others kept looking over their shoulders at every

sound and every new shadow, just as I felt myself doing.

The whole place was thick with dust. The floor was seemingly inches

deep, except where there were recent footsteps, in which on holding down

my lamp I could see marks of hobnails where the dust was cracked. The

walls were fluffy and heavy with dust, and in the corners were masses of

spider's webs, whereon the dust had gathered till they looked like old

tattered rags as the weight had torn them partly down. On a table in the

hall was a great bunch of keys, with a time-yellowed label on each. They

had been used several times, for on the table were several similar rents

in the blanket of dust, similar to that exposed when the Professor

lifted them. He turned to me and said:--

"You know this place, Jonathan. You have copied maps of it, and you know

it at least more than we do. Which is the way to the chapel?" I had an

idea of its direction, though on my former visit I had not been able to

get admission to it; so I led the way, and after a few wrong turnings

found myself opposite a low, arched oaken door, ribbed with iron bands.

"This is the spot," said the Professor as he turned his lamp on a small

map of the house, copied from the file of my original correspondence

regarding the purchase. With a little trouble we found the key on the

bunch and opened the door. We were prepared for some unpleasantness, for

as we were opening the door a faint, malodorous air seemed to exhale

through the gaps, but none of us ever expected such an odour as we

encountered. None of the others had met the Count at all at close

quarters, and when I had seen him he was either in the fasting stage of

his existence in his rooms or, when he was gloated with fresh blood, in

a ruined building open to the air; but here the place was small and

close, and the long disuse had made the air stagnant and foul. There was

an earthy smell, as of some dry miasma, which came through the fouler

air. But as to the odour itself, how shall I describe it? It was not

alone that it was composed of all the ills of mortality and with the

pungent, acrid smell of blood, but it seemed as though corruption had

become itself corrupt. Faugh! it sickens me to think of it. Every breath

exhaled by that monster seemed to have clung to the place and

intensified its loathsomeness.

Under ordinary circumstances such a stench would have brought our

enterprise to an end; but this was no ordinary case, and the high and

terrible purpose in which we were involved gave us a strength which rose

above merely physical considerations. After the involuntary shrinking

consequent on the first nauseous whiff, we one and all set about our

work as though that loathsome place were a garden of roses.

We made an accurate examination of the place, the Professor saying as we

began:--