Fractured hearts

The talk

Tara pov

Clocking out comes just as quick as I gather up my belonging and get ready to leave, however as I leave out the back door I see holden standing there next to his car looking smug, he already knew the time I finished and waited for me. I was like he knew I wouldn't text or call him, he expected me to run again and I wouldn't lie and say I didn't think about it because it ran across my mind a couple of times. I look him up and down wondering if he's been there the whole time or found out what time I finished. I knew he wanted to talk but I at least thought I had a day to figure what I wanted to say to him, I am at a lost of words about this marriage as I didn't exactly expect it and an annulment is out the equation considering I woke up that night with my legs sore and bite marks all over my body, I wish I remember that night but I still cant remember anything. If I was a normal person I would ask him to give us a shot but I'm not and I don't know if its safe to be married.

"I thought we could finally talk, I don't want my little runner running" I hear him say opening the door to his car and I nod my head unsure why he's calling me his little runner, yes I ran that night, any other person would do the same. However I haven't run since he found me, I could have got one of the ladies to finish my shift and run but I didn't and I'm still standing there shockingly. Looking at him I take slow steps towards his vehicle needing no one to hear his conversation, I don't want my brothers finding out I am married and they definitely know hot to get it.

Giving Holden my address we sit quietly in the car as he drives wondering how we both are going to play this thing out, he hasn't taken his eyes off the road while I haven't taken my eyes out the window trying to find the words to describe this. I don't even know what this is right now as we both haven't asked for a divorce or how we both kept our wedding rings close to us around our necks.

Normally you would start with 'i'm sorry' however I am definitely not sorry for running, if my bothers did find out I wouldn't see the day light again, or be left alone. The brothers can be very over protective with me that if I texted them asking for help that they be at my home within less then half an hour guns blazing asking who we are killing with a place to burry the body all planned out. Finally bringing my eyes to holden I see him looking at me with soft eyes, I look away to find out we are here, climbing out the car I head towards my door to unlock it needing to be where I know I am safe and once I step though the door Holden is right behind me pinning me against the door.

"I have been looking for you" I hear him whisper in my ear before pulling his face away slowly, before I can say anything holden presses his lips genteelly on mind before slowly stripping me out the clothes before picking me up still pinned by the door and I waste no time wrapping my legs around his waist deepening the kiss wanting this as much as he wants it right now as we move from the door to the kitchen. Holden places me on the kitchen counter pulling my trousers down my legs leaving me exposed, I am not shy about my body as I know I am toned in all the right places but a holden looks at me I don't know why I feel like I need to cover up.

"I have been dreaming about this" holden whispers kissing down my stomach slowly before getting in-between my legs to my c**t, I lend back as he slowly runs his tongue over my opening, I don't hold back as he pushes my legs further apart before pushing two fingers inside me I tense before relaxing against the movement, I let out a moan as he moves his fingers faster hitting the spot over and over again driving me insane. Holden is like a starved man and I grab his head needing to ride his face I am taking everything he is giving me right now, needing... wanting that release.

Holden doesn't hold anything back before he's pushing two fingers in my opening hitting my g-spot without even trying, his other hand lingers near my rear entrance teasing the hole and I don't know why but I need it, I need to be full.

"Please.... f**k me" I beg needing it and holden waste no time making eye contact with me before lowing his trousers, we don't take our eyes off each other as he pulls his c**k out his boxers and it stands there hard on attention, god I forgot how big he is as I am gawking at it. Without any warning holden slams into me and I let a moan slip as he f***s me hard... rough against the counter which is turning me on even more, I am pulling his hair out as he sucks... licks on my left boob

"Harder, f**k me harder now" I demand needing him to stop teasing me and f**k me like the animals we are, holden looks at me with a smirk before he wraps one hand around my throat and the other around my hair. This I could get used too as he f***s me like it could be our last time, I am on the blink off crashing when holden slams soo hard into me that I see stars, my legs tighten around him taking everything and seconds after I crash I hear holden mumble something under his throat before slamming into me one last time.

"That mouth is going to be the death of me" Holden says pulling out of me and pulling his trousers up, I look down and realise we didn't use protection, I run a hand over though my hair before walking to the bathroom to clean up. I just need a second to myself right now as I remember everything that has currently happened between us two.

Walking out the bathroom I have thrown on a over sized t-shirt knowing we now need to talk, I look in the living room to see holden has already made himself comfy with two glasses of wine on the coffee table, I walk around and take a seat next to him. We both look at each for a second both wondering how to start this conversation, I bite my inside of my mouth hoping holden will start this conversation off as I can't, I am ready for his to ask for a divorce.

"I am just going to come out and say it but I don't believe in divorce, I want to give this a shot. Myself and you six months if we don't work out I will grant you whatever you want" Holden says and I stare at him unsure if I actually heard him correctly as I know damn well that my brothers cannot know about this, this man will be dead within a second and his body chopped into tiny pieces, buried somewhere I wouldn't know.

"I don't know, I know nothing about you" I finally say taking a slip of my drink, if I would have said yes I would have already been keeping a massive secret from him, this is reckless of me and I cant believe I haven't stopped it yet but I know deep down that divorce aren't something in the criminal word, you will always be tied to someone and used as a weakness.

"Thats not a problem, I buy nightclubs and hotels across the world and sometimes I sell them, other times I keep them. My favourite colour is black, I have a loving family as my brother is my best friend" I smile as holden looks at me and I don't know why I am thinking about this. Should I be thinking about this, holden sounds too perfect to be true and I have already been there once and I ended up coming out worse.

I look at holden before standing too my feet and walking around the living space unsure what I actually want to do as the s****l chemistry is there and I enjoyed our date we had before the marriage however can I love when I am hiding who I am. I am a killer, or should I say was a killer. My whole family are assassin and while I was a killer I haven't killed in five years since that night, my brothers have stood by and let me live a normal life, my twin checks up on me regular and tells me if I want anyone dead to ring him and he will pull the trigger.

Do I want to do this? Is the question running around my head...

"Ok. This has to be a secret between the two of us, I don't want anyone knowing this" I say coming to a stand still as I stand there not feeling confident with the decision I just made as I don't want a repeat of that night and I know there is a possible of that happening.

My mind is overthinking and I start pacing the living room once again, I didn't see holden climb to his feet and when he steps in front of me he places one hand on my cheek looking at me like everything going to be ok but I don't think it is, he doesn't know my past and he never will. Running the past though my mind holden lends down and steals a kiss trying to calm me down and it works as my arms wrap around his neck, he pulls away slowly

"Its going to be ok"