Slave of the Alpha's Heart

Chapter 10

Can you please explain why you won’t tell me what’s bothering you?”

He asked softly, trying not to startle the angel too much.

Cas looked at Dean for a moment before sighing deeply. He knew what Dean was asking but didn’t want to talk about it yet. Dean understood, however, that Cas needed help right now so he would wait until the other man decided to let him in.

The younger Winchester nodded understandingly and walked over to his bedside table. He picked up a photo of them both with Michael and Castiel in heaven, the archangel smiling widely as they sat on the grass outside. In it, Cas seemed happy. He had been there with Gabriel when they arrived back in heaven a year ago and while Cas didn’t seem to be doing anything particularly remarkable or out of place with Heaven’s angels, Gabriel was very excited that he could finally go home with someone else besides Raphael. The two brothers were practically inseparable after their banishment from heaven and were constantly looking for new adventures. It was good to see Gabriel able to be free once again.

Castiel was still sitting down when Dean got back and was holding the photograph gingerly, a far away look in his eyes. The hunter put the picture back down and reached out for his hand. He gave a little squeeze and smiled encouragingly.

“I don’t know how, Dean. I just… it hurts too much sometimes. Seeing all those memories from when we’re children. They are my friends, too, even if none of us remember them anymore. Seeing that they have been forgotten makes me want to cry,” Cas confessed quietly. “That doesn’t make any sense though. If they aren’t here and they can never remember us then how do they miss us? How does this pain come from knowing what we are like and how long has it been since I saw them last?” His voice became quieter as he spoke, almost a whisper. “Why is it happening, Dean? Why does the pain stay when I try not to think about it?”

Dean gently squeezed Cas’s hand again, not speaking. He had an idea about what Cas might be feeling but didn’t want to say it unless he was absolutely certain about it. After some time passed, Cas took a deep breath and pulled his hand away, standing up. He walked towards the front door without waiting for Dean to follow. He paused next to it, not moving, and turned around. His expression wasn’t exactly sad, but he wasn’t quite relieved either.

“If anyone finds out…” he began cautiously.

Dean frowned slightly, his mind working rapidly. “What about?”

“About… about me being human, I don’t want anyone finding out where I came from. I don’t want any hunters after me, or anyone who knows about angels or Heaven. Please, Dean. No one can ever find out, okay? It needs to be just between us. That way, everyone here will be safe,” he pleaded. Dean felt bad about making Cas worry like this but he really hadn’t wanted to scare the other man. The hunter nodded solemnly.

“Okay, I get it. We’ll keep it our secret. You have my word.” With that he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Cas. He held his boyfriend closely. “You’ll always have me by your side. No matter where we are, what we’re doing, or who we’re fighting against.”

He felt Cas nodding slightly in agreement. Dean continued to hold his boyfriend tightly for a few more moments, not wanting to let go anytime soon. When Dean did pull away, he rested his forehead against the other man’s, closing his eyes briefly. A tear slipped from Cas’s eye as well and dropped onto Dean’s cheek.

“Thank you, Dean,” he whispered.

His words caused the hunter to smile slightly. He placed a soft kiss on his lips before pulling back completely. “Don’t sweat it, Sunshine. I promise you that no matter what happens, no matter who or what gets in our way, nothing will ever bring me down. You’ve been through worse than that, you’ll survive anything you throw our way.”

Cas smiled faintly as another tear escaped his eye. “Thank you,” he whispered. He looked down for a second before raising his gaze to meet Dean’s once more. “Come on, Dean. Let’s head back inside. I made enough food so we should eat before heading off to bed,” he suggested softly. He brushed his thumb along the hunter’s cheek before turning around to leave.

When Dean followed, he couldn’t suppress the small grin forming across his face.

He was in love with his husband. Nothing else mattered. Nothing else could ever change that. Not even Lucifer himself.

~ ~ ~

It was early morning when the brothers finally found a motel room. Their trip to California had taken longer than expected because of the traffic and traffic lights they encountered. Even after getting out of the car, they spent at least five minutes standing around staring at each other before deciding to walk into the hotel. At least the rooms weren’t overly expensive. They didn’t have much luggage anyway so it didn’t really matter. Besides, they had money. So why not spend their hard earned money on something nice?

They settled on room 303 which happened to be close to the main hall, a common occurrence when they stayed in hotels. As they stood in front of the door and stared at it, wondering what the hell they could possibly do to occupy their time, Dean heard a loud crash coming from somewhere further in the building. He frowned slightly, glancing up and down the hallway and wondering whether he should check on whoever that was. On one hand, it sounded like it was probably a mugging gone wrong. On the other hand, they had just spent most of the night wandering aimlessly around a big city so Dean thought he would feel better knowing that everything was going okay. Besides, maybe someone in their group had managed to break a glass door or a lamp. That was bound to happen more often than they could count; Sam loved pranks.

Deciding that it wouldn’t hurt, Dean opened the door and immediately tensed. His brow furrowed when he spotted his younger brother standing on top of the kitchen island surrounded by shattered pieces of china.

“Hey, Sammy, what are you doing? Did you fall down the stairs again?” he called out, stepping inside.

Sam jumped slightly and spun around to stare at Dean, a guilty look on his face. Dean frowned harder at that, suddenly becoming worried. This was not the first time that had happened.

“You okay, kiddo?” Dean questioned as he carefully approached his brother. When Sam said nothing he crouched down next to him to inspect the damage. “Damn… that looks pretty bad. Do you need some ice or something?”

“Um, yeah. But only if you get rid of that piece of toast,” Sam mumbled quietly as he pointed behind Dean to the pile of breakfast food left on top of the counter and floor.

Dean snorted quietly, getting the hint. He picked up the discarded bread and threw it in the trashcan in the corner before returning to his brother. He handed Sam a cold pack and waited for him to take it, watching the younger man’s reaction closely. He knew Sam was lying about not falling down the stairs. He was usually pretty clumsy but Dean knew there was something else going on, obviously. He was just hoping that whatever it was he would help it along. Maybe he could distract his little brother a bit so he could figure out what was bothering him. He knew that it wasn’t easy to keep secrets from the person you care about the most but he really hoped that Sam could tell him sometime soon.

After Sam finished taking the ice pack and the towel Dean offered him, he sighed.

“I really am sorry, Dean. I didn’t mean to destroy everything. I guess it’s just habit, I guess,” Sam explained. He didn’t bother looking at Dean. Instead, he stared down at his knees.

Dean shook his head. “Nah, dude. Don’t worry about it. You shouldn’t blame yourself. It’s alright. Everything’s fine, I swear.” He gave Sam a gentle squeeze before releasing him and reaching for his phone to call Ellen. He needed to talk to her about some things. He needed to talk about how he felt about his relationship with Cas. She would understand. And she would help them sort out whatever was causing his headache. After all, she had dealt with this before. And while Dean wasn’t sure if his girlfriend could really heal his headaches, she definitely had helped him work through some similar things before and they seemed pretty different. Besides, even if she couldn’t heal the headache entirely, she could probably give him a mild analgesic to lessen his discomfort.

Chapter 2

After talking to Ellen and explaining about what had happened earlier, she agreed to watch over both him and Cas whilst he went back to hunting.After talking to Ellen and explaining about what had happened earlier, she agreed to watch over both him and Cas whilst he went back to hunting. She told Sam they’d keep her updated on everything happening from there, although Dean knew this was more for his sake than anything else as it wouldn’t be like them to not check up on the other if one of them was injured or something.

When Sam left with their father in tow, it hit Dean how much he really didn’t want to be left alone right now so he took the opportunity to head into the library. He knew the place pretty well by now from being there nearly every weekend when he wasn’t in school and the only thing that could get him out of the house better than a stack of books was going home again, even if he was surrounded by strangers. He needed to get away from all these hunters who were constantly watching out for him or at least tried to. If he wanted any real peace and quiet he would have asked Lucifer but he couldn’t bring himself to ask after everything that’s happened since Lucifer last got out of prison so he was stuck trying to cope by himself until he found a way to get through whatever the f**k was going on.

Cas and Gabriel were still nowhere to be seen when he arrived and Dean felt his heart sink just a little more before realizing that maybe he’ll find them in a couple hours when he comes back from work. For now, he decided to settle down in one of the comfier armchairs to do some reading while waiting. Not a single hunter or angel had tried to stop him since he walked in so he assumed his presence hadn’t been noticed yet either.

The book had gotten a little boring halfway through and he was contemplating getting another when he heard the familiar creak behind him. Before he had a chance to turn around he saw someone walking towards him. The person seemed very tall, which would normally freak Dean out but he couldn’t help thinking the guy looked familiar enough to be anyone else so why should he care?

As soon as the man stopped in front of the chair he was currently sitting in, Dean realized that yes, that definitely did sound like Castiel. He turned around quickly in surprise only to see a slightly taller version of Cas standing there looking at him expectantly. Well s**t, Dean thought.

Dean stood up slowly to show he meant no harm and he honestly expected the older man to step back so that he could move out of his space. Instead though, Cas just smiled at him softly and offered a hand to shake. Dean stared at it blankly for a moment before taking it, unsure whether to smile back or let go as quickly as possible. Thankfully Cas seemed too polite to take offense and simply continued smiling as he waited for Dean’s response.

“What?” Dean finally blurted out when he realised that he still had no idea what to say. He hoped that he sounded less rude than he felt inside but apparently the angel just kept smiling.

He didn’t need to answer right away because he was already interrupted by Castiel turning around without missing a beat.

“Hello Dean,” Cas said in greeting. Then Dean remembered his name.

“Hey,” he replied in return, hoping Cas would understand that he didn’t know where he was going with the conversation, especially not after the way he’d reacted before.

“This is my home.”

Okay, that made some sense. But Cas just stood there silently as if he didn’t quite understand how Dean didn’t seem surprised by the fact that he was there. That was understandable since this entire situation was completely new to Dean too but still.

Dean sighed and decided to take charge.

“I’m sorry, I don’t-“ he started before Cas cut him off.

“It’s okay,” he said gently before giving a reassuring pat on Dean’s shoulder. “I was expecting you to be here, I was worried I might have caused you unnecessary distress.”

Well, that certainly wasn’t what Dean had been expecting to hear.

“