my tough husband

4

tears from my eyes rolled down as if ocean is isn’t enough. he took the push upon his ego and hit me hard enough for me to fall on the floor. he pounced on me and started biting me everywhere. my horrors, my past and my present came flashing I felt another level of fear and pain that cannot be expressed by words. my blouse got torn, he on my top forcibly kissing me all this mental trauma I couldn’t take it more and just like that the world seemed to fade and everything blanked out.

I hear the voice of Arya which made me open my eye. I saw I was in hospital and Arya beside me crying and apologising so that I don't leave her just like her mother. I caressed Arya with my hand and called her name. she looked at me in shock and soon the chock was replaced with excitement and happiness as she screamed, “daddy daddy mommy woke up come fast come fast daddy"

my husband entered the room and the fear shivered through my heart. reminiscing the night tears started and I just wanted him to be out of the room but didn't have the energy to do so.

he spoke to Arya instructing her to be out of the room till he tells her to in. Arya always feared her father and she did what he said.

I turned my face to the other side not wanting to see his face. I knew I see it I will feel all the more pain than it already does. I couldn’t help but started crying. this time he held my shivering hand to comfort me but nothing he said or he would now would comfort me. he promised to make my life hell he fulfilled it. I couldn’t see him his face, I hated him.

then he suddenly said something I never expected he ever would. he said, “I am sorry Preeti. I never intended to do something like that. I didn’t know you were molested before. I was way too drunk to think "

what the f**k. what does he mean he doesn't know that I was molested? his f*****g friends did that s**t. and wait what does he mean by that he wouldn't have done otherwise. hurt splurged through me and I couldn’t help but responded quickly with fire in my eyes, “you mean if I hadn’t dozed off you might have r***d me "

“I didn't mean it that way. Manvi told me what happened "

"did Manvi told you why did it happened? who did it if you truly believe that you didn't know"

"she said she cannot say anything else if I wanted to know I should ask you”, he said.  his eyes were deep like ocean and I wanted to drown me into them but how can I forget what he did. what he always did. just because I love him, I am a doormat to him.

he again interrupted my thoughts, “will you tell me who did it?"

"john and his friends. now don't think I am stupid enough to not realise you are lying. john was your best friend you two were always together. you told him to handle me and he did. I never intended to hurt Diya that day.  Diya was my friend too. I never knew that she is in love with you. if I had known I would never would have conveyed my feeling for you. then they were their playing with my pride as if a heartbreak and repeated rejection wasn't enough", I couldn’t control my tears and start sopping. I continued, "please Manav I am broken, each and every piece of my body my heart is broken into thousands of pieces. you don't have to punish me like that. I didn’t marry you to take Diya’s place in fact I can never take Diya’s place. neither I want any place in your heart. I married you for uncle and for Arya. please stop this or else I would be forced to die. before uncle I will suicide." the last words went slurring from my mouth as I turned my face. he was silent no idea what he was thinking. all I know is he was repenting what he had done. after a long silence and watching over he finally broke the silence saying,

"when I woke up in the morning, I was on the top of you on the floor. at first, I thought you were asleep so I went on take a shower when I came out and saw that you were still asleep, I noticed your condition and tried to remember what had happened. seeing your condition, I figured that I was drunk enough to hurt you bad. so, I lift you to the bed and went to make breakfast for you and Arya. Arya came home, I got her ready and sent to the bus. when I got ready for the office and I went. afternoon Arya called me up crying that you are not waking. I rushed to home to see you in the same condition I left you. I am sorry Preeti I really am. I was not in my control. please forgive me"

if he would apologise like that my mind was on the crossroads. I loved him since my childhood but what he had done in past was enough for me to not forgive him. I chose to remain silent and seeing no response from my side he stated, “we can go home within a few hours"

he brought me fresh clothes and Manvi also visited me. Manvi told me he was devastated by his act and I should forgive him. why not my best friend was taking his brothers side when his brother tried to r**e me just like his friends. Arya never left my side. she said she would be my side till we go home. on the way to home he hardly touched me or spoke to me. I reached my room I was so exhausted that I dozed off without uttering a word. when my eyes flew open it was 2 in the morning and my husband was beside me in the bed. shirtless. as much as I was mesmerised by his appearance, I had my fears and situation to deal with and by the way who gave him the permission to sleep beside me in the same bed?? I stepped out of the bed and went to Arya's room to sleep with her. when I hugged Arya, she hugged me back and dozed off to sleep again in her embrace.