The Noise of Silence
546 Words
The incident at the gallery changed something. Murat became more withdrawn, his presence less constant. Selin found herself reaching for empty air more often, finding nothing.
“Where are you?” she’d ask the empty apartment.
Sometimes he’d answer. Sometimes he wouldn’t.
Dr. Levent noticed the change during their session. “You seem distracted today.”
“Just tired.”
“Selin, I want to ask you something, and I need you to be honest with me. Do you still feel Murat’s presence?”
The question hung in the air. Selin had been so careful for so long. But now, exhausted and confused, the truth almost slipped out.
“Sometimes,” she said carefully. “In memories. In dreams.”
“Not in waking life?”
“No. Not anymore.” The lie tasted bitter.
But what else could she say? The truth—that Murat was actively withdrawing from her, creating distance even in their impossible closeness—would only confirm everyone’s fears about her mental state.
That night, she confronted him. “You’re pulling away.”
“I’m trying to give you space.”
“I don’t want space. I want you.”
“But maybe you need space, Selin. Maybe I’m holding you back from actually living.”
“Don’t do this. Don’t decide what I need.”
“Someone has to!” His voice cracked. “Because you won’t admit that this is destroying you. You’re lying to everyone. You’re lying to yourself. You can’t build a life on a ghost.”
“You’re not just a ghost. You’re Murat. You’re the man I love.”
“I was the man you loved. Now I’m just… an echo. And you deserve more than echoes.”
Selin felt tears streaming down her face. “So what? You’re just going to disappear? Leave me again?”
“I never left you the first time. Death did. But this… this half-existence we’re clinging to… it’s not fair to you.”
“Let me decide what’s fair to me.”
“You can’t think clearly when I’m around. That’s the problem.”
“So you’re making the decision for me?”
“No. I’m just… creating distance. So you can see clearly. So you can choose freely.”
“I’ve already chosen!”
“Then choose again. Without me influencing you. Without my presence clouding your judgment. If, after some time alone, you still want this… if you still choose me… then I’ll be here.”
“And if you’re not? If you disappear and can’t come back?”
Silence. Because they both knew it was possible. They both knew that whatever force was keeping Murat tethered to this world might not last forever.
“Then you’ll finally be free to live,” Murat said quietly.
“That’s not freedom. That’s loss.”
“Maybe they’re the same thing.”
And with that, his presence faded. Not completely—Selin could still feel a faint coolness, a distant awareness. But the intimacy, the constant companionship, the sense of him always being right there… it was gone.
Selin stood alone in her apartment and screamed. A raw, primal sound that no one heard. No one responded to.
She was, for the first time in months, truly alone.
- Writer
