The Fracture
714 Words
When Selin woke up that morning, she didn’t feel rested. Her sleep hadn’t been interrupted, but it was heavy. As if she’d been thinking about something all night, but couldn’t remember what.
She sat up in bed. Looked at her watch. Not too early. But not late either.
The house was quiet. Kerem was still sleeping.
She got up. Put something on. Went to the bathroom. Picked up her toothbrush. Looked in the mirror. Her face was a bit pale. There were faint shadows under her eyes.
She turned on the faucet. Found the water too cold. Made it lukewarm.
While brushing her teeth, she looked at her reflection. For a moment, her eyes caught on something else. Behind her shoulder. It was empty. But Selin looked anyway.
Habit, she thought. That’s all.
In the kitchen, she decided to make coffee. She didn’t want tea like yesterday. She pressed the button on the coffee machine. The machine rumbled to life. This sound didn’t bother Selin. On the contrary, it reminded her there was movement in the house.
She took her coffee and sat at the table. Her phone was on the table. The screen was dark. Selin didn’t look for a while. Then she picked it up. No notifications.
She realized this made her happy. This realization didn’t sit well with her.
I shouldn’t be happy about this, she thought.
Kerem emerged from his room a bit later. He was wearing a t-shirt. He stretched.
“Good morning,” he said.
“Good morning.”
Kerem looked at the coffee. “Any for me?”
“You can make some,” Selin said. Her tone wasn’t harsh but it was distant. Kerem noticed.
“Something wrong?” he asked.
Selin shrugged. “No. Just sleepy.”
Kerem headed for the coffee machine. Didn’t say anything. This silence comforted Selin but also made her uneasy.
They had breakfast together. But it wasn’t like the previous day. There wasn’t much conversation. Selin took her bites slowly. Kerem tried to talk a few times but Selin gave short answers.
“Do you want to go out today?” Kerem asked.
Selin thought for a moment. “I don’t know,” she said. “Maybe later.”
Kerem nodded. “Okay.”
This “okay” twisted something inside Selin. Why did he accept so easily? she thought. Was I expecting him to push?
After breakfast, Selin went to the couch. Drew her knees to her chest. Turned on the TV. Random channel. She wasn’t watching.
Kerem cleaned up the kitchen. Put away the dishes. Pushed the chair back in. Everything was normal. But something was missing for Selin.
What’s missing? she asked herself. Silence? Noise?
Suddenly, unease filled her. Without reason. Without cause. But familiar.
She stood up. Went to the window. Looked outside. There were people on the street. Life was continuing. Selin saw her own face reflected in the glass. There was nothing behind her.
But she turned and looked anyway.
Kerem noticed this. “Are you looking for something?” he asked.
Selin hesitated. “No,” she said. “Just… seems like it’s overcast.”
But it wasn’t overcast.
Kerem said nothing. He picked up his jacket. “I’m going out for a bit,” he said. “Grocery store and stuff.”
“Okay,” Selin said.
When the door closed, the house became quieter. This silence pressed down on Selin. She sat back on the couch. Put her hands on her knees. Clenched her fingers.
This is normal, she thought. Being alone is normal.
But her heart started beating a bit faster.
She picked up her phone. Opened it. Didn’t go to photos. But looked at messages. There were old conversations. Names. Dates.
She stopped at one name.
Murat.
Her finger hovered over the screen. She didn’t open it. But just having it there was enough.
“Don’t,” she said to herself. “You don’t need this.”
She put the phone on the table. Stood up. Walked around the house. Opened cabinets unnecessarily. Closed them. Touched the bookshelf. Pulled out a book. Then put it back.
Suddenly a voice rose from within. Not clear. Not a sentence. But as a feeling, it was very familiar.
The c***k had begun.
- Writer
