Chapter 18
979 Words
JANICE'S POV
The question hangs between us long after the words leave Eden's mouth.
For a second I forget how to breathe. The parking lot disappears, the traffic disappears, and everything narrows down to the man standing in front of me waiting for an answer I have spent five years avoiding.
My pulse pounds so hard it hurts.
I should say something. I should tell him he's wrong, tell him he's imagining things, tell him anything that will make this moment disappear.
Instead, I just stare at him because I can't.
Eden's eyes never leave my face.
That makes everything worse. He isn't angry, he isn't shouting, and he isn't demanding anything.
He's waiting.
The silence stretches painfully between us.
"Janice."
My throat tightens immediately.
I shake my head once. Not an answer, not a denial, just panic.
Something changes in his expression and I turn away first.
"I have to go."
The words sound weak even to me.
"Janice."
"Please......"
That one word stops him not because he's satisfied but because he hears the desperation inside it.
I walk away before he can say anything else.
The entire drive home passes in silence.
One question repeats over and over inside my head. How much does he know?
The answer frightens me because I don't think it's enough, I think it's worse, I think he's getting close.
By the time I reach the apartment my nerves are completely destroyed.
Jack notices, children always do. He sits cross-legged on the living room floor surrounded by dinosaurs and looks up from his latest excavation project.
"Mama?"
I force a smile.
"Hey baby."
His forehead wrinkles.
"You're sad."
The observation hits harder than any accusation ever could.
"I'm tired."
"You always say that."
I laugh despite myself, unfortunately he's right.
Jack crawls closer and wraps both arms around my waist.
The simple gesture nearly breaks me because everything I have done, every lie, every sacrifice, every terrible decision was supposed to protect him.
Now I'm not sure any of it worked.
The next few days become a nightmare as I avoid Eden.
Eden refuses to disappear.
Every hallway becomes dangerous, every conversation becomes impossible and every glance feels loaded with questions neither of us knows how to survive.
The balance I've maintained for five years starts collapsing piece by piece.
At work Celine notices almost immediately. She catches me staring blankly at a prep list for nearly five minutes.
"Okay."
I blink.
"Okay what?"
"You're officially scaring me."
I force myself back to reality.
"I'm fine."
Celine snorts.
"No human being has ever said that and meant it."
The answer almost makes me smile.
Across the kitchen Chan notices the exchange.
Later he quietly takes over inventory, supplier calls, and half the responsibilities that normally belong to me.
Nobody says anything directly but both of them know something is wrong, they just don't know what.
Meanwhile Eden keeps asking questions, the kind that are impossible to escape.
One evening he catches me near the service elevators after most of the staff have already left.
The second I see him my stomach twists.
He notices.
"If he's not mine, say it."
The words are too calm. I stare at the floor.
"If I'm wrong, tell me."
Silence, absolute silence because every answer I could give would be a lie.
The thought hangs heavily between us then Eden exhales slowly.
For the first time since this started, he looks tired.
"I don't know whether to walk away or stay."
My chest tightens painfully because I don't know either.
The truth would destroy him, the lie is destroying him anyway. Neither option feels survivable.
That night Jack wakes up crying and I rush into his room immediately.
The nightmare has already faded by the time I reach him, but tears still cling to his eyelashes.
I sit beside him and pull him into my arms.
"It's okay."
His breathing gradually slows.
"It's okay, baby."
Jack rests his head against my shoulder.
Half asleep, half dreaming then he asks quietly, "Did I do something wrong?"
My heart shatters because even he can feel it, the fear, the cracks spreading through everything around him.
"No baby."
My voice breaks.
"You didn't do anything wrong."
Jack nods sleepily then closes his eyes again.
A few minutes later he's asleep and I stay beside him much longer watching him breathe, listening and protecting just like always.
The next morning my phone rings while I'm getting ready for work.
The number makes my stomach drop.
The cardiologist and I answer before the second ring.
"Hello?"
"Ms. Soto."
Something about his tone instantly puts me on edge.
My grip tightens around the phone.
"Is Jack okay?"
"He's fine."
Relief floods through me so quickly I almost sit down then the doctor continues.
"We may have found a donor match."
Everything stops.
The room, my thoughts, my heartbeat.
All of it.
"What?"
The word barely comes out.
"A potential match became available this morning."
My legs finally give out and I lower myself into the nearest chair. Hope crashes into me so hard it hurts.
Life-changing, potentially life-saving and the thing we've been waiting for, praying for and fighting for, for years.
Tears instantly fill my eyes.
"Oh my God."
The doctor remains quiet for a moment then his tone changes and dread immediately follows.
"There is one complication."
The hope inside me falters.
"What complication?"
Silence, just enough silence to make my stomach drop then the doctor says quietly, "Before we proceed, we'll need biological family history from the father."
The room goes completely still, I close my eyes because for the first time ever, the truth isn't just emotional anymore.
It isn't about guilt, it isn't about fear and it isn't even about Eden. It's medical, official, necessary and I may no longer have the option to keep it hidden.
- Writer
