Hidden Under the Rain

Chapter 8:The Letter That Was Never Sent

The café door closed behind me. The rain was shut away in another world.

Gu Shen didn't come out. He sat there, head lowered, shoulders hunched, like a shadow being swallowed by time.

"Let's go." Zhou Ye's voice was soft.

He took Nian Nian from my arms. She nuzzled into his neck and went back to sleep. He held her like a real father would.

We walked to the car in silence. The rain was so heavy it felt like the world had turned upside down.

I leaned my head against the window. Rain streamed down the glass, blurring the street outside into a watercolor painting.

"Shen Zhi," Zhou Ye said.

"Mm."

"Was that him?"

I was silent for a long time. Then: "Yes."

He didn't ask anything else. He just turned on the heat so Nian Nian wouldn't catch a cold.

That was Zhou Ye. He never asked the questions that would hurt me.

I closed my eyes. The memories came flooding back.

---

Five years ago.

I stood outside Gu Shen's building, soaked through.

The rain that day was even heavier than today. My umbrella had broken within minutes. I called Gu Shen seven times. He didn't answer. The eighth time, he turned off his phone.

His light was on. I could see his shadow behind the curtain. He was home. He just didn't want to see me.

I should have left.

But my hand was pressed against my lower abdomen. Inside me, smaller than a fingernail, was something that would change everything.

The pregnancy test was in my bag. Two pink lines.

I wanted to tell him. Gu Shen, I'm pregnant. It's yours.

But he wouldn't see me.

After forty minutes, the curtain moved. He looked down at me through the rain.

And then he pulled the curtain closed.

Not slowly. Not reluctantly. Just... closed.

I waited another ten minutes. The light went off, then on, then off. He never came down.

Finally, I walked to the trash can. I pulled out the pregnancy test. The two pink lines were already smudged by rain.

I tore it into pieces. Then I tore the pieces into smaller pieces. I shoved them to the bottom of the trash can and walked away.

I didn't cry. I didn't have the strength anymore.