Journey of a Dancer

The offer

Somewhere inside me i knew mom was not wrong even though she has lied because i know the reason for her lying and that is she just didn't wanted how our family is, the old way of thinking and to believe in old custom system , that anyone came to know about all these things I mean when you're living in the 21 century and still haven't move on from all the old ideologies which right now people are resenting how we, my family is still stuck up to all that thought why they are not moving ahead and accepting or to live how other are living in this generation,what is the problem everyone will started asking some will laugh and make fun of our family and this mother is not ready to disclose how our family is but ready to lied about it though it is wrong and one day it will breakout all the hidden secret will come out so there is no point of lying. My family is or should I say trying to portrait a superficial life while is totally futile since gradually the hidden secret would reveal and then one cannot hide it anymore so it is better to be what you are instead of lying to all . Party was still on my cousins have some weird games to play like you gotta sit on the balloon and brust it out with only your butt cheeks not with the use of hand, firstly it was Peter trying it out instead of sitting he jumped on the balloon with his butt cheeks facing the balloon and balloon it brust but he hurted himself everyone laughed at him both me and my cousin could not brust it out with butt so all of us loses the game and the next game was to spin for 50 times then say i am a fool again my cousin Peter tried it he spin correctly but as soon as he stopped he fall again hurted himself i realised one should play these games when they wanted other to laugh or to make fun of your own self , moving on Daisy tried and she nearly puked because of spining so hard and after seeing everyone condition i give up myself i don't want to puke out or to fall down to hurt myself so it's better to stop when you know you should yeah again a important lesson is to stop or stay still when it is important. After all this making fun of yourself game ended as well as the party me and mom returned to our home . It was a hurtful things for me that I never get to celebrate my birthday with my own family members never in my life till now and god knows until when , celebreating birthday with cousins and aunt's uncle is fine good but what about the feeling of celebrating it with my grandparents with my dad my own uncle I want this feeling where they all are here with me on this day atleast why our family is this much broken apart ,why my family members could not join the happiness of mine why only sadness is the thing that they gave me, I don't even want gift just my family to be there singing the happy birthday song with me enjoying the day with me,why can't I have just a Normal day like other kids of my age where they get to celebrate their birthday with their family even their family is just their parents still they get to enjoy and me whose family is a joint one still I am not able to enjoy that special moments. Why I get the feeling of being unwanted sometimes i get this feeling that no body in the family wanted to have me and I am just a burden on them that they has to carry on and they are doing good in their jobs as they are literally making me feel like a damn burden nothing not even a single memory of feeling of being wanted they made me feel only and only the package of horrible things are increasing and living up in my minds . After thinking about all these i slept again in the morning same routine waking up, getting dressed,go to school, come back from school and whenever I get the chance i practiced my dance skill this routine continue are sometimes and one day something different happened one of my friends told me that she is joining a dance classes now you all would be thinking what is the different thing in this as it was normal for children to join dance classes but different was that she offered me to came with her to dance classes for the audition as we both are friends so she would not be awkward as well as has a companion their as well . The offer is something which i would never reject I mean this is what i was waiting for all my life a chance to get the exposure of how it feel to be trained dancer so of course i said yes then she told me audition is after one and half month later and we will go together there. The whole time i had this thought in my mind that finally I'm getting what i always wanted to get but again the reality hit me that this is just a daydream thing that will never became a reality as my family would never agree to that especially my grandfather their custom , thought of old time would not let them become agree to me learning dancing let alone become a dancer , in their eye being a dancer is just a low class profession which according to them would on one respect and will always shame me and them for letting me become a dancer instead of any noble job . I was so sure that when i would tell them that I wanted to join a dancer they would never give me permission for that and i would only get scolded but in my heart i knew this is my chance to stand up for myself because if I can't then on one would do that on behalf of me honestly speaking I am so scared to tell this new to my family ...