Veil of secrets: mortal's quest

Shattered illusions

This was like a torture for her, she wanted to escape again, but if even her own conscience is here to remind her of all the truth, which she was so eager to escape from.

Suddenly she recalled the words from that woman, that claimed to be a moon witch, so now she finally sees why she's faced with her own conscience, it was because she needed to finally face her own past, that held all the truth from which she has always ran away in hopes to finally have a happy ending.

"Are you seriously going to cry now? Look at yourself. You're just a pathetic creature, while your family is like a pure angels, that follow the Gods words." Her conscience continued to taunt Reina, while she actually had started to cry, tears flowing across her cheeks and over the hand, that was still held infront of her mouth."

At this sight, Reina's conscience placed it's hands away from her mouth and forced Reina to look into the mirror again, where she saw herself, being as disgusting as ever, since she never belonged among her family with such strange traits.

Her whole family was beautiful and weren't such emotional freaks like Reina was, most of the time everyone refered to her as the ugly duckling of Harrer family, so she started to feel in such way, no matter compliments that she recieved from some of her friends or strangers.

"Get away from me." Reina suddenly spoke up trought her sobs, just to get away from this thing holding her.

At her words, her conscience only laughed at her, because they're inseparable till the day Reina dies.

"How adorable of you to say that. We are one whole and there's no escaping me any longer, since you have done that just enough times to piss me off." Her conscience mocked Reina, which even made Reina get on her knees infront of the mirror and start to beg.

"I promise to not run away! Just get away from me and allow me to do what I need to do. I will never dream of perfect family, since those are just useless dreams." Reina cried out, while her conscience slowly turned back to the dark figure it was previously, since it saw no use being similar to someone, that hates themselves to the point where they don't distinguish reality from dreams.

"Just wake up. Don't make promises to yourself. You have done enough to ruin yourself." After her conscience said that, it disappeared from Reina's sight and now she was alone, again, like she has always been.

Reina now sat there, on the ground, while wiping away her tears with the sleeves of her shirt.

Once she had calmed down, she stood up and headed out of her room, just to be faced her real family, the one that despised her for being different, making her feel like some unwanted guest in her own house.

"Reina. You have been too loud in your room. I don't care what you did, but it messed up your brother's nap time." Her mom's voice rang out in the usually cold and hateful tone, which Reina always wanted to sound like sweet melody, but those were just her dreams.

"Sorry, Mrs. Harrer." Reina responded to her mother, but she was polite, since she was not allowed to refer to her own mother by simple word 'mom'.

Once Reina apologized, her mother just looked at her face and saw the stains of her tears all across her cheeks, but instead of being concerned, she simply scoffed: "You're a mess. Clean up before you come outside of your room."

"Yes, ma'am." It only took for Reina to constantly be polite to her mother and treat her mom like some kind of noble lady, just to not get hit or punished like a lowly servant.

When Reina responded like usually, her mother finally left her alone and went past her, not giving any more glances, than necessary.

It was humiliating, but at least she had a roof over her head, even if it wasn't home, she had a house were she could stay at.

---

For a moment, Reina just stood there, looking in the direction where her mother once stood, thinking about all the times she had to apologize for just breathing at the wrong time in her mother's presence, because that was simply considered rude.

Her mother could never conceive a child, so she adopted Reina and her little sister, Grace. But somehow, only Reina had to suffer the consequences of doing something wrong by her Jesus-freak mother, who believed in all the Ten Commandments, but in her own way.

Her mother always said that Grace was truly a 'sending from God,' so she named Grace literally as a child of God. Only Reina suffered at her mother's hand. Since she wasn't adopted as an infant, she already had a name, even though her mother tried to change it after adopting her.

For example, the fourth commandment says, 'Honor your father and mother,' which might seem harmless, but her mother took it to another level.

In the past, when Reina was five, she accidentally forgot to say 'thank you' after being served dinner. As punishment, she was sent to time-out for an hour. But it wasn’t just standing in the corner—it was kneeling on dry beans scattered on the ground while praying for forgiveness from God.

After she finished praying, she was sent off to bed without dinner because she 'didn't deserve it, since she didn’t honor her mother.'

While Reina stood there in the empty hallway, she felt tears forming in her eyes again. This time, her little sister noticed her and approached her.

"Why are you still enduring this? You're 18 now. You should leave and never come back, because she hates you," Grace said, concerned for her older sister. She had been punished for her mistakes too, but never as severely as Reina.

"You know I just can't," Reina answered, her voice cracking a bit from all the crying. "I just wish I could tell our mom that a few hours ago, I was dead in a completely dark place. But neither of you would believe me, because now I'm standing here, alive."

"Sis, please, don't tell me you've gone mad. If I lose you—the kind soul who took all the blame for me so I wouldn’t get punished by our Catholic freak of a mother—I won’t know what to do," Grace said to Reina, hoping her sister was still okay, even though she knew Reina had every reason to lose her sanity.

"I have not, don't worry." Reina answered to Grace, while wiping away her tears, since her mother already had said, tnat she shouldn't look like a mess.

"Then why are you always so quiet when she scolds you or says something mean to you?" Grace asked, her voice a mix of curiosity and confusion.

Reina hesitated, her gaze averting Grace at all cost, before she finally spoke. "Because I simply can't say anything," she answered. But deep down, she knew the truth ran far deeper than what she had admitted.

It wasn’t just that she couldn’t speak—it was the way her words always seemed to betray her. Every time she tried to defend herself, the result was always the same: her mother’s icy glare, her voice rising with fury, and the endless lectures about how sinful Reina was. It didn’t matter what Reina said. In her mother’s eyes, her words were nothing but excuses and her silence was the only acceptable answer.

---

Of course, Grace wasn't satisfied with her oldest sister's denial, because she was truly worried about her. She had seen how much Reina had endured all these years, despite

Reina's illusions of a perfect family.

Grace had always noticed how Reina seemed to lose her mind at times whenever their mother yelled at her. Reina would just smile and pretend as if those harsh words were warm

loving ones. It made Grace deeply concerned about her sister's mental condition.

When Reina was at the Gauthier Manor, Grace tried countless times to contact her in worry, fearing that the one person who had always been by her side might have taken her own life from the immense pressure and stress their mother caused.

"Just admit that you're not fine! Talk to me! Please, Reina!" Grace suddenly yelled at her sister, grabbing her by the shoulders, ready to shake some sense into her. "Don't you dare stay quiet! How much longer will you endure everything in silence like some kind of doll?"

Grace's yelling made Reina's tears intensify. She grabbed at her own brown hair so hard it looked as if she might pull out chunks, desperately trying to cover her ears.

"I cannot do that!" Reina snapped, her voice trembling as she broke free from Grace's grip and collapsed to her knees in helplessness. "Because whenever I make a mistake, I get punished. So now, even simple yelling or a warning makes me feel like I just want to bury myself in the ground so deep that I can't breathe anymore. Even that makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong"

Reina's voice cracked, her words spilling out in a sudden release of years of pent-up pain.

"It's like an endless tumor growing inside me," she continued, her hands shaking. "| just can't get rid of it and speak my mind, because I'm afraid that if l do, l'II ruin everything to the point of never being able to get back on my feet. I don't want to be alone, so I endure it, even if it worsens my fears and the feeling of loneliness. I just don't want to argue anymore."

As Reina broke down, Grace

hesitated before kneeling beside her, wanting to hug her and offer comfort, but she didn't dare interrupt, afraid of stopping Reina when she was finally opening up after all these years.

"It just kills me from the inside,

Reina whispered, her tears streaking her face. "To hear all those harsh things and how even my smallest mistake-like being late by only one minute--causes everyone to sigh in disappointment. I thought I was

perfect when I brought home gold medal from that stupid competition, where I injured my legs, but now that l've lost it all, I feel like everyone just hates me. Even when they say the opposite, I can see it on their faces."

Her voice lowered, trembling. "But I can never guess what's true, when I look at those kind faces, so I just assume the worst. Because everyone probably thinks the worst of me anyway."

Reina had finally opened up to her youngest sister, after all these years of pretending like everything was fine and she lived in a perfect family, but only after being in the Gauthier Manor, she finally realized that she has to stop this illusions, before she goes completly mad with trying always to be perfect and meet her mother's expectations, even when it's as clear as a day, that her mother simply hates her.