So Confused

Chapter 2

“Side reaction is the reactant that may loss during a chemical reaction. Always remember that it is the heat that is always the waste product” our Professor preached.

“Alam mo girl, mas gusto ko pa magsolve ng problems kesa ganto na lecture ng lecture si ma’am. Nakakabagot” Zylea murmured

See? She really can’t shut her mouth. Cold daw.

“Eh kalian ka naman kasi naging interesado mag aral Ms. Ibarra?” Mackenzie commented and chuckled.

“Ay wow Uy, para namang nakikinig ka hahahahahah” Zylea Replied.

“If Ms. Niebre caught you, patay kayo” I said. Mabuti sana kung hindi malakas ang boses ni Zylea.

“Yes Ms. Diligent.”

“By the way, nasaan si Abi?” I asked. I haven’t seen him since the first subject.

“Baka na late lang. She’s not replying.” Hazel replied.

“You texted her?” Maki asked

“Yes.”

Ano kaya nangyare doon? I know she’s not that studious, well, wala naman saming mahilig mag aral, but she never misses classes. She doesn’t listen, but she is present.

After my chemistry class ay vacant kami. This is what we really enjoy, vacant hours. We just went to the food court and eat.

“Yan lang kakainin mo?” Maki asked.

“Yes”

“Is that you Amelie Marie? Ang konti niyan ah”

“HAHAHAHAHA magbabawas yan ng 2 kilo girl” Zylea blurted out. Napakasaya niya pa talaga na hindi ako makakain ng usual amount of meal ko.

“What? Haha. You’ll gonna suffer now bitch.” Maki added

I rolled my eyes. Uminom na lang ako ng maraming tubig, atleast this will ease the hunger.

“Si Brent ba yun?” Hazel asked. Maki almost die dahil nabilaukan siya.

“Anjan ka pala gurl?” Zylea asked. Hazel just smiled at her.

Hazel has always been quiet, kabaliktaran ni Zylea. She would always smile as a response, nagkwekwento naman siya, but she often listens than talk. Lagi siyang nakatutok sa cellphone niya.

Maki wipe the juice na natapon at tumingin sa direksyon na tinuro ni hazel.

“Fcking gorgeous Brent Avez” Maki said at para nanaman siyang lumulutang sa cloud 9. Matagal na siyang may gusto sa Governor ng Accountancy

“Bakla naman yan girl” Zylea commented. Pinanlisikan naman siya ni Maki at binalik agad ang tingin kay Brent.

I can say na okay naman si Brent medyo malamya lang talaga gumalaw, at masyado malinis. Well, straight guys can be this clean right?

I took the opportunity na magpaalam. Pinapapunta ako ni Cathy sa Library, yung research nanaman namin.

“I’ll just go to the library. Study matters”

“You sound so studious jan girl. Bet ko yung study matters” Zylea

“Gaga” I bid my farewell at lumabas na ng foodcourt. Buti na tong may Gawain, atleast hindi ako makakapagtambay sa foodcourt para kumain.

“It’s you again” a baritone voice stopped me from walking.

Pag lingon ko ay si Kuya Levian nanaman.

“Kuya”

“Levian” he corrected

“Your 3 years older than me” sabi ko

“Stop with the courtesy. So where are you going?”

“Library, school stuffs”

“Sabay ulit ako. Sa Med department lang ako.”

“Med student ka?”

I never had seen him in uniform. Wash day ng university ngayon kaya naka jeans and V-neck sya. Med students are easily distinguished dahil sa uniform nila.

“Yup. Veterinary Medicine.”

“Oh wow. That’s cool” sagot ko na lang.

Vet Med? Sa hayop yun diba? Kuya Levian is really that good guy ha? Appreciate small and simple things plus he love animals. That’s rare for a guy.

“Practice kayo mamaya?” he asked.

Tumango naman ako “That’s my escape”

“From?”

I looked at him and smiled “Shits”

He chuckled and tousled my hair. Ang dali dali lang para sakanya nun dahil ang tangkad niya. Hanggang balikat lang ata ako eh.

“See you later Amelie” he smiled bago siya lumiko papunta sa Med Department.

.

“Bakit di ka pumasok kaninang Morning period girl?” Zylea asked Abi

Ngayong hapon na lang kasi siya pumasok. Pag pasok niya, mukhang okay naman siya. But I can see that she lacks sleep. But she seems to be fine, nakikipagkwentuhan naman siya.

“LBM girl” she thriftly replied and go back to her phone.

“Okay. Oy girls, paano pala yung Coloumb’s Law? May recitation na at lahat bukas, wala pa akong alam.”

“Nagtanong ka pa talaga sa mga nakikinig ha?” Maki sarcastically replied.

Tawa naman si Zylea at ngumuso. “Wala ata akong maisasagot bukas hahahaha”

“Sama sama tayo” Maki answered

I know I won’t. I may not look studious, but I would not enter a class with a graded recitation unprepared. I’d be dead.

I put studying into my least favorites, but if it is needed to study beyond that level of likeness, I study.

Dad has always been repeating that I should study, study, study. I gotta get good grades. Bayad ko na daw yun sa pag buhay niya sa akin. I need to get high grades para hindi siya mapahiya.

He was against me joining arnis. So I never told her that I continued joining. He’d be literally angry to the point na kausapin niya si Coach na i-kick ako sa team. My father is insane.

“Balita ko sa Main campus ang University meet ah?” Maki asked

“Yes. Tuwang tuwa mga ka team namin na lalaki. I don’t know why.”

“Duh. Eh may tourism dun eh.” Maki answered

I frowned. I don’t get it.

“So?”

“Ay girl. Edi ibig sabihin madaming maganda doon.” Zylea answered.

“Dito kasi sa Campus natin wala, Education, Engineering, Medicine, Criminology at Accountancy lang. Ang mga magaganda, nasa Tourism, at meron nun sa main campus.” Mahabang paliwanag ni Maki

So they shouted kasi madaming magagandang babae dun? Silly.

Nagkibit balikat na lang ako at nagbasa ng notes tungkol sa Coloumb’s Law

When training hours came, umuwi muna ako sa apartment dahil naiwan ko ang Jogging pants ko. To my surprise, nandun si Papa.

“What brings you here?” I asked him.

He was sitting comfortably on my sofa, watching an afternoon show.

“Feels like you don’t like seeing me.” He coldly replied.

“Because I really don’t want to.”

He stared at me intently as he approached me. “Don’t be like that to me, I’m sending you to school Amelie Marie.” He said with a warning tone.

I clenched my fist. I need to relax. “What do you want?” I asked

“My informant told me na dumating na ang magaling mong nanay.”

Napatingin ako sakanya. Seeing if he was serious.

“He said that she had elevated into a wealthy woman.” He chuckled. “But you know what? She’ll be just as foul as she is. Go pay her a visit and see if she still cares for you.”

With that last word, he left me.

Nakabalik na siya dito after 17 years of hiding.

With all of my frustration, I changed quickly and run back to the gym as quickly as I can. I want to forget everything I heard today.

Pag dating ko ay sumaludo ako kay Coach at nagpaliwanag. He added 5 laps, and I don’t mind that. I think I need myself to get exhausted.

“Don’t bring your personal life in here Levian and Karlwin” Coach shouted.

I stop running to see the situation. Nag sparring pala ang dalawa sa mga seniors. I had noticed that there’s a bad blood between them. Laging parang may kuryente sa pagitan nila pag magkikita sila.

Nagkabalian nanaman sila ng padded cane. Ganyan naman lagi kapag sila ang nag sparring, minsan nga lang pero laging sumisira ng cane.

“I’ve been telling this repeatedly, I’m not into tolerating your fights. This is a combat sports, but it is not for childish fights.” Coach said in an authoritative tone.

“Sorry coach” Kuya Levian apologized

Karlwin smirked at him before apologizing.

After witnessing that scenario ay nagtatakbo na lang ako ulit.

If I pay her a visit would she let me in? kilala niya pa kaya ako?

Papa get me when I was still 3 years old, pinapabayaan kasi ako ni mama noon, lagi siyang nagsusugal at nanglalaki. I don’t know the reason why. Kaya yun na lang ang laging bukang bibig ni papa sa akin, that I should be thankful kasi binigyan niya ako ng maayos na buhay. Really?

He gave me a life full of expectation and standards. He gave me a life where in I can’t do anything according to my will. Lagi niya akong dinidiktahan at pinapagalitan. There’s one time na pinagbuhatan niya ako ng kamay, and he never apologized for it. This is not a life that I would be thankful about.

I finished my 25 laps and rested. I want to fight. Gusto ko pumalo. But then Coach introduced us to Ate Pupa, our Likha instructor.

Ate Pupa waisted no time. Medyo masungit din sya kaya naging seryoso kami sa pag memorize ng ituturo niya. Almost 30 secs lang ng whole performance ang tinuro niya pero sobrang nakakapagod na. At hindi pa rin kami nangsasabay sabay. Mabilis si ate magturo, buti at magaling mag memorize si Aya.

After practicing likha, naupo ako sa tabi ni Zylea.

“Bakit ka late gurl?”

I looked at her, pawis na pawis na, pero ang dimple niya, anjan pa din. I wish I could be as optimistic as her.

“LBM” pag sisinungaling ko na lang sa kanya. I don’t like talking about things that makes me sad and stressed.

Mukhang naniwala naman siya. “Laro tayo?” pag aaya ko

“Ay girl, nakailan na ako, pagod na ang lola mo”

I rolled my eyes, napapagod rin pala to. With that, naupo na lang ako at pinanood ang laro ni Paul at Ejay. It’s good to see that Paul is still here. I think he still believes that he’d be chosen this time. I’m praying that he’d be chosen. It’s sad to be always left and questioning yourself.

“Ate, laro tayo?” Napalingon ako sa gilid ko. Exactly what I’m needing, Grant Limuel.

I smiled at him and nodded. I don’t need to win, I just need to let go of some frustrating shits.

“Sir, kami ni Ate Amelie sunod” sabi ni Grant kay Coach, tumango naman ito sakanya.

After 2 minutes ay turn na namin. Binihisan ako ni Zylea ng gear na medyo basa basa na. Kung kani kanino na itong pawis. But if you are enjoying things, hindi mo na lang yan mapapansin.

“Manlalaro pwesto” Kuya Nikolai served as our referee. Zylea, Kuya Levian and Marcus served as the scorer.

In arnis, there is a three man holding 1 blue and red flag. Itataas nila ang flag ng kung sino man ang unang nakapalo in their point of view. Kung sino ang mas maraming nataas na flag, doon mapupunta ang score, but if there is only 1 scorer to raise the flag color, hindi yun counted, the rule is that you must have 2-3 raised flag.

“Ready to lose again ate?”

I smirked at him “Never been ready”

“Pugay”

“Handa sa pakikipaglaban”

Upon hearing that, every player must show some artistic moves for about 3 secs, it’s up to you kung gusto mong sumigaw.

“seyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy” we both shouted.

I shouted, with all of my thoughts and agony.

And for the nth time. I lose to grant.