So Confused

Chapter 4

“May mga assignments ba tayo?” I asked Abi. Lunch break kasi namin, I decided na sumabay muna sa kanila para na rin magtanong ng mga assignment.

“You’re such a lucky b***h, nasa main lahat ng teacher simula pa kahapon.” Abi replied

Nakahinga naman ako ng maayos. 2 days na lang bago mag UM kaya super focus na kami sa training.

“So I’ll be going, ingat kayo mamaya ha? Bye.”

Umakyat ako sa Gym, hindi na ako dumaan sa hagdan dahil ayaw kong mapagod. Magpapakilo na ako diretso sa clinic.

I’m not that nervous sa upcoming game, mas kinakabahan ako with these two excess kilos. Hanggang ngayon hindi pa din nawawala. Kahit anong takbo at pagod ko.

“You’re here” Kuya Levian said. Pagpasok ko kasi ay saktong inaayos niya ang medicine sa mga lalagyan nito.

“Magpapakilo ako”

“Ah, okay. Ako na magkikilo sayo”

He guided me papunta sa weighing scale nila. Mabuti at digital na yun, makikita kung ilan talaga ang exact kilo mo in points.

“Chin up” he instructed me.

“49.7”

I frowned. Sa dami ng itinakbo ko, .3 lang ang binawas? Seriously?

“Ilan ba kailangan mong weight?”

“I must be just in 47 kilogram, or even 48. Hindi ko alam kung bakit di bumabawas. Lagi naman akong tumatakbo.”

“You know kailangan mo kasing pagpawisan. Hindi lang pagod, you should sweat.”

“Arg, ngayon ko lang nalaman na nakakafrustrate mag lose weight.”

“Yes, it is really frustrating, especially that napakasarap kumain.”

I sighed. I picked up my bag and wear my shoes.

“Aakyat ka na?”

“Ah yeah. Hinihintay na ako ni Zy”

“Sabay na ako.”

“Ikaw bahala.”

He asked for me to wait dahil magpapaalam lang daw siya sa nurse in charge at kukunin ang gamit niya. I sit on the chair sa side habang nag hihintay.

Ang bango talaga sa clinic. Plus the ambiance is good. I found it peaceful.

“Let’s go?” aya niya. Tumango na lang ako at sumunod sa kanya

PInagbuksan niya ako ng pinto at sabay na kaming naglakad papunta sa gym.

“How old are you by the way?” he asked

“I told you, you are 3 years older than me”

“Oh so you are 20. Ang bata mo pa.”

Siya lang ang nakapagsabi sa akin na bata pa ang 20 years old. All people around me especially my relatives are telling me that I’m old, matanda na pero wala pang napapatunayan.

“Bata kasi matanda ka na.” biro ko sakanya.

This fast few days we had been talking, halos sabay kasi kami naglalakad pauwi and we talk about random things, karamihan tungkol sa hayop. He loves telling stories about it. We’ve been talking about a lot of things but none of them was personal, none of them was about each other, and I like that. Sometimes we just want to make connections, not sympathy or feeling of pity or amazement.

Pag pasok namin sa Gym ay dumiretso agad ako kay Zylea. Its good na hindi niya ako nakita pag pasok dahil paniguradong tutuksuhin niya nanaman ako. I just said hi at dumiretso na agad ako kila ate Pupa, ako na lang ang hinihintay eh.

“Okay kumpleto naman na kayo. Let’s repeat the routine.”

Ate played the music and we go along to it. Halos memorize naman na namin, nagkakasabay sabay naman na rin kami, but ate Pupa seems to be not contented. She is always frowning like something is wrong.

“Pugay. Po” Aya commanded and we saluted.

“Okay naman na eh, but it is plain. It lack thrills.”

Nagpamewang siya at naglakad lakad. Kami na man ay umupo muna.

“Ano nanaman kaya iniisip ni Ate Pupa, sumasakit na ang katawan ko sa paulit ulit niya.” Ligaya complained.

So do I, kada uuwi ako sa apartment, kapag mahihiga ako, yung braso at balakang ko ang kumikirot. Kaka rolling ito. Kahit sa mat kasi siya, still masakit parin kapag bumabagsak, and sometimes in order to cope up with the fast rhythm, mali na ang pagkaka roll na nagagawa ko, kaya masakit talaga.

“Can you do a stand rolling?”

We are all shock of ate Pupa’s question. I know stand rolling is easy, but for those who had been practicing it for the long time. Siguro magagawa namin yun pero ang synchronization namin ang mawawala. At mahirap ng practisin yun especially na masakit na ang katawan namin.

“Okay, formation, palitan natin lahat ng rolling niyo ng standing rolling.”

Wala na kaming nagkawa nila Aya kundi magtinginan na lang, pero deep inside, we really want to hit someone named Pupa.

.

“Oh kumusta girl? Para kang matandang nirarayuma ah” Zylea said ng Makita akong paika ikang naglakad papunta sa kanya.

“That Pupa girl!” I murmured.

Alam niya namang nahihirapan kami pero ipinipilit niya parin. Were not veterans here. Bago lang kami sa likha!

“Akala ko ba okay na ang likha niyo?”

“Oo nga, but she changed the rolling and the other parts. I thought we are just going to polish everything.”

“Paluin ko na ba girl?”

I just frowned and sit on the bench.

“I’ll be needing more salonpas” I murmured.

“Mag cocombat ka pa, kaya mo pa ba? Problema pa yang kilo mo Amelie”

“pinaalala mo pa. Just let it be, magpapapawis na lang ako ng maayos bukas. I think I can’t even run with my body aching”

“Oh I know some doctor, I know to that you know who he is” sabay wink niya pa.

“Zylea, he’s a veterinarian okay. Sa hayop yun.”

Tinaas taas niya pa ang kila niya “RaWrR” she roared na parang isang malanding tigre. Kung ano ano talagang iniisip niya.

“Ano kaya pa Amelie?” ate Pupa came in the scene. Of course the mighty Amelie would disguise as a very fine person.

“Yes Ate Pupa”

“Very well, balik ka na dun sa mat. 3 more rounds at tama na”

I think I can’t even finish one.

Ang sakit sakit ng balakang ko, konting galaw lang sumasakit masyado. Pahinga na ang kailangan nito.

“Okay girls, ready?”

‘una una kaya kaya’

‘una una kaya kaya ayyyyyy’

“move” aya

“Hap cha, hap sey, hap chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”

“Likha anyo, solo baston, poooo” we chanted

Every move I make, mas nararamdaman ko yung tingling sensation sa balakang ko. Ang sakit sakit. Pakiramdam ko hindi ko na kayang paikutin ang yantok ko.

“Amelie, naiiwan ka na” Ate Pupa said

I looked at Aya, 2 seconds ahead sila so I make my moves fast, ininda ko ang sakit para makaabot ako sa kanila, and when I did, sakto sa stand rolling.

And to my surprise, mali ulit ang naging bagsak ko.

I tried to stand pero pucha, it is f*****g hurting like a b***h.

I see all of them running towards me kaya mas lalo akong kinabahan, I tried again standing but Kuya Levian pushed my shoulder back.

“What are you doing?” I asked him.

“That’s what I’m going to ask you. Wag mo ng pilitin ang sarili mo.” He replied

“You are overworking them Pupa. Bakit mo pa kasi pinalitan?” coach angrily said.

Hindi naman nakasagot si Ate Pupa

Napahiyaw ako when Zylea tried to help me stand up.

“Don’t move me. It f*****g hurts.” I screamed.

“I’ll help you” Kuya Levian said.

I can see a concern in his eyes, mukha na siguro akong tuta sa paningin niya.

“Sino marunong mag motor? Eto susi ko” Coach asked

“I’ll help her.” Everyone looked at Karlwin whose standing behind Zylea, nakapamulsa pa ito.

“No, I’ll help her.” Kuya levian insisted.

Karlwin smirked. “You know how to drive? Or are you suggesting you carry her to the clinic which is a 10 minute walk from here?”

Kuya Levian was left speechless. Kinuha ni Karlwin ang susi bago ako tinulungang tumayo.

“Let go of her already, ako na ang bahala” Karlwin said ng pagtayo ko ay hawak parin ako ni Kuya Levi.

“Bring her to the clinic, susunod ako” He said and looked at me before letting go of my hands.

“You can still walk right?” he asked me. Umoo naman ako pero still inalalayan niya pa rin ako

Fck, ramdam na ramdam ko yung sakit habang naglalakad. I just hold my tears back. I don’t want to look like a child here, but fck, it really hurts.

“Hold on to me” he instructed before we drove off to the clinic.

.

“San ba ang bahay mo?, I’ll bring you home” Karlwin asked

“Ah, ibalik mo na lang ako sa gym.”

He stared at me blankly. “I’ll bring you home. Pinagpaalam na kita kay Coach. You need to rest.”

I tried to stand up, pero andun parin yung sakit. f**k.

“Pag ipinilit mo pa yan, lalo kang hindi makakapagperform o kahit laro sa UM”

Tama naman siya. I need to take a rest. Okay lang sa akin na hindi makapag likha, pero makapaglaro? NO.

At the end, pumayag na lang ako magpahatid sakanya.

“Just drive straight, yung gray na gate sa left side. Dun mo ako ibaba”

Hindi na rin lang siya sumagot at nagdrive na papunta sa apartment ko. Hindi naman kalayuan sa university kaya nakarating din kami agad. Inalalayan niya ako papasok sa loob.

“Thank you Karlwin”

“No problem. I got to go” he said.

I timidly smiled at him and watched his retreating back, pero tumigil siya at lumingon sa akin

“Is Levian courting you?” he asked

“What? No.”

Nagkibit balikat siya.

“He seem concerned with you anyway” he said and grinned.

I stared at him. Why does he sound so bitter kapag binabanggit niya ang pangalan ni Kuya Levian?

“Bye” he waved goodbye at iniwan na ako.

I laid my back on sofa. Pucha ang sakit talaga. I tried sleeping, sana pag gising ko wala na to.

.

I was awakened by a knock on the door. I tried getting up, and it was not easy. The pain was still there, but it is tolerable.

I get up and opened the door. It was Kuya Levian

“Why are you here?” I asked him. He just flashed an awkward smile

“I’M HERE TOOOOOOOO” Zylea shouted, lumusot siya sa may tagiliran ni Kuya Levian

Hindi ko pa nga pinapapasok ay pumasok na ang babae at prenteng umupo sa sofa ko.

“Pasok ka kuya” I said and lead him inside.

“May dala si Kuya na pagkain para sayo girl. Dali kuya, gutom na rin ako”

Nakakahiya talaga siya. I looked at Kuya Levi, he was staring at me.

“Are you fine?” he asked

“Nako girl, kanina pa yan aligaga na pumunta dito sayo, kinulit ako ng kinulit na samahan ko daw siya” Zylea whispered to me. Siniko ko na lang siya sa tagiliran.

“I’m fine, pahinga lang to.”

“Buti naman, eto nga pala, I asked Zylea kung anong gusto mong pagkain. Para hindi ka na magluto.”

He gave me a plastic bag na may pagkain, pag tingin ko ay adobo iyon.

Tiningnan ko ng matalim si Zylea, eh hindi naman to ang paborito ko, paborito niya to. This girl!

“Asan ang kanin mo girl? Ako na magluluto, dito na rin KAMI kakain Kuya Levian.”