Wicked Obsession

KABANATA 6

THE TENSION is in the air. Pareho kaming sinakal ng tensyon dahil sa ginawa kong iyon.

I never ever felt this way before on a guy... Except Sebastian. I know he can make me feel like this–gaya ng dati. Ganitong-ganito ang pakiramdam ko... sa tuwing lumalapit siya sakin bilang si Silver at hinahalikan.

Napailing ako sa naisip.

We are not even kissing! At wala akong balak makipaghalikan sakanya!

Ano ba 'tong pinag-iiisip ko?

Sebastian is looking at me fiercely. Seryoso ang mata nito habang ako ay matapang siyang tinititigan pabalik.

I want to show him that I am not affected!

Hindi ko alam kung namamalikmata lang ako o ano, but I saw his head moving slowly into me. My heart started to thump for a moment—pero noong umatras siya ay tila nagising ako sa kahibangan.

Bakit hinayaan ko siyang ilapit ang mukha sakin!?

Sebastian took a step backward.

"This is a common courtesy, Cara. Hindi kita iiwan dito... At hindi ko rin hahayaan na makawala ang taong may masamang ginawa sayo. Dahil after all, we're friends..."

This is really unbelievable! Friends!? He is acting like a hero!

"Dapat pala ay hinayaan mong makulong ang kuya mo, kung ganon!" Duro ko sakanya. "Silver, your brother Sebastian did something wrong on me! Tapos... this is ironic! Wala ka ngang pakialam noong niloloko ako ni Sebastian!"

Ipinikit niya ang mata sa sinabi ko. See, he is guilty!

"Fine. What do you want to hear? Kung bakit ko ginagawa ang lahat ng 'to?"

"Why? Are you going to tell me your reasons?!" Mabagsik na sigaw ko.

"I am guilty for what I did in the past, Cara. That's why I am doing this! I am sorry, and allow me to do something good... at least—"

Natigilan siya noong tumawa ako. This is really funny and impossible! He is so... imposible!

"At bakit kita hahayaan magpakabait sakin? To cleanse yourself? Para mapawi ang konsensya mo, Sebastian?" I asked him.

His lips flatten. Hindi alam ang isasagot.

"I will not let you live in peace ever! Magdusa ka sa konsensyang nararamdaman mo—dahil walang-wala pa 'yan sa ipinaranas mo sakin!"

Tinalikuran ko na ang lalaki at sumakay ng sasakyan. This is so frustrating.

How dare him told me that? Talaga palang may ikakapal ang mukha ng isang walang hiya.

Sinaktan, niloko, at pinaglaruan niya ako noon... Nagpanggap siyang si Silver... At mukhang wala lang sakin ang nangyari pero I know to myself that I am so wounded inside. The trauma and all...

I cannot even move on. Dahil sakanya, I became a distrustful person.

Ang dami niyang ginawa sakin. Para pa rin akong nabuhay sa... nakaraan. Para akong naiwan. It feels so unfair for me because he had a big progress—pero ako? Ito! I am just fvcking mad on him like I feel in the past!

He progress. The past hunts me. Masaya siya at may iba ng babaeng niloloko ngayon—habang ako naman ay hindi makalimot sa ginawa niya.

Like... How dare him act like I was nothing when he ruined my life? It feels awful. It feels so unfair!

Napuno ng luha ang aking mata. I will have my revenge. Kahit pa damay ako sa gagawin—I just want to get back.

WHEN I TOOK a step entering in house, my father looked at me. Angry.

"What did I tell you about your dress!?" He hissed on me. "Cara, pinapahiya mo ako sa ibang kasamahan ko!"

What a great greeting for a person who is a victim!

I looked at my mother. She looks hesitant and afraid of our arising situation.

"Father," I looked at him. "I am the victim here!"

My father shook his head in annoyance. Ipinikit pa nito ang kanyang mata na parang ako ang maling-mali!

"Kung hindi ka agaw pansin—"

"Ito na naman ba ang usapan, Dad?" I hissed on him, frustrated. "Ang anak mo, nabastos!"

Maybe everyone expected that my father is... a hero. A man who has his principle for all. But they are all wrong!

"Honey—"

Nagsalubong ang kilay ni Dad. "Ilang beses ko bang sasabihin sayo na itigil mo na ang kakasuot mo—"

"And then what?!" I cried in annoyance. Lagi na lang kasing ganito!

I am... sexually harassed! Pero ganito ang nangyayari! Sakin ang sisi! Kaya ayokong nirereport or pinapatulan ang nang-babastos sakin! Because my father will blame me for it!

"And then act graceful! God, Cara. Ikaw lang ang iisang anak ko, pero ang usapan sayo, puro kahihiyan! Paano ka rerespetuhin kung kada-linggo, iba ang lalaki mo!?"

Oh my god. He is really going this far!

Matapang kong hinarap ang ama. If my mother isn't holding him, malamang ay kanina pa ako nasampal nito!

He never listens!

"Dad! I am a victim! Bakit... bakit sinisisi mo kung ano ang suot ko!? For petes sake, I am wearing a blazer and pants! Hindi niyo po ba nakikita!? Anong kabastos-bastos dito—"

"You're image is disgusting!" Duro nito sakin. "Iyan ang dahilan kung bakit ka binabastos! Kasi hindi ka kagalang-galang!"

Napailing ako. I don't want to agree with him, pero ang sakit na nararamdaman ko ay pinipigilan na akong magsalita.

I walked away—and he started hissing hurtful things.

"Cara! I am not done talking to you yet! Isa pa, I told you not to hang out with any Galliano! Lalo na ang kapatid—"

"Oo na!" Malakas na sigaw ko noong nasa hagdan. He... just doesn't want to shut up! I hate it! "And we are not hanging out! He is my business partner! Puro ka salita, Dad! Pero hindi mo naman alam ang nangyayari—"

"Look how you raise this ungrateful child!" Duro sakin ni Papa.

Hindi ko siya pinansin at umakyat na lang sa kwarto. There, I cried all ny frustration. Mom, dad, and Sebastian.

I hate this day so much.

I LOOKED at the city lights down from my office. My company, ALTA is really high and this beautiful view never gets old for me.

"Bestie," Shaina called me. "It's okay. Hindi alam ni Tito ang sinasabi niya—"

"Then why does he keep talking?" I asked my friend. "Hindi niya pala alam ang sinasabi. He should have shut his face. Lagi na lang... damit at ugali ko, Shaina. But father never cared if I was hurt..."

My friend looked at me with pity. "Cara.."

"Hindi pala niya maintindihan... So why does he keep blaming me for things na wala akong kasalanan? I am the one who is hurt..."

"Cara, he is just worried about you. Nagkaganyan si Tito simula... noong alam mo na. Iyong may nangyari sainyo ni Sebastian." Alo nito sakin.

Right, after the grand scheme of Sebastian, there was my father who blame me for what happened.

"Are you a fool!? Bakit ka naniwala, Cara?! Are you not watching? Paying attention?! Ang laking problema ng dinala mo sa pamilya natin!" I remember the exact words of my father.

Hinawakan ni Shaina ang balikat ko at tinulak sakanya payakap.

"Hindi ko sinasabi na tama sila Tito. But they are your parents and care—"

I snorted. "Care? The way they care hurts, Shaina!"

"Pasensya friend, for hurting..."

Niyakap ko pabalik si Shaina.

"This is all Sebastian's fault," I hissed in annoyance. "I shall avenge myself..."

"Avenge?" Lumayo si Shaina at tinignan ako. "In what way?"

Napasinghap ako. Iyon... ang hindi ko alam. I don't even know how the fvck.

"I don't know! Gusto ko lang makaganti! And I know he is fvcking Sebastian! Nagkukunwari na naman siya and I will not let him do it!"

"Umamin na ba sayo?" Tanong ni Shaina.

"No! Tinatanggi niya! But whenever we are talking about us, wala siyang tinatanggi!"

Umiling ang kaibigan ko at naupo sa sofa. Tamad niya akong tinignan.

"Akitin mo, para umamo. Tapos paaminin mo. Record ganon!" Natatawang suhestiyon niya.

It sounded ridiculous. Funny.

Tumigil si Shaina sa pagtawa noong mapansin na tahimik ako.

"No! No!" Sigaw ni Shaina at parang pinagsisihan ang sinabi.

Her idea... sounds angelic. Parang may tumunog na anghel sa likuran ko noong sinabi niya iyon.

Akitin para umamin.

Right! She is so right about that!

"No! Cara, I am just... joking!"

Hinawakan ko ang magkabilang balikat ni Shaina at inilingan siya.

"What do you mean joking?" I smiled on her. "You are brilliant, Shaina! Ang talino mo para maisip 'yon!"

Marami ng tumakbo sa isip ko para isagawa ang plano. Like, Shaina's idea is the key for my plan! Sunod-sunod na ang nangyayari sa utak ko, and I cannot help but to feel excited!

"Ano!? Gusto mo talaga akitin si Silverio—"

"He is Sebastian!" I told her. "Hindi siya si Silver!"

"Pero sa mata ng lahat, siya si Silver! At pag inakit mo siya—-sino ang magmumukhang masama, Cara?"

Napaisip ako sa tanong nito—but it didn't bother me so much. Ipinagkibit balikat ko na lang ang tanong niya.

"What? I can tell Sebastian to break her off. Ayoko rin naman maging relationship wrecker... So I will ask him to do it!"

Umiling si Shaina. "Cara, that is foul! Nanunulot ka—"

"That is not Silver sabi! So basically, I am clean! Wala akong sinulot, inagaw or what... Dahil sa una pa lang, walang relasyon si Lara at Sebastian."

My god, this is so brilliant.

I think... I still have a power over him. He is obsessed with me before... Ang dami niyang ginawa sakin noon at impossible na wala akong epekto sakanya ngayon.

I can rule him over until he confess his sins...

I will seduce wicked Sebastian Galliano.