Unlocking His Past

CHAPTER 8

—BLAIRE'S POV—

"WHAT THE HECK, ASHTON?! SAAN MO BA NILAGAY HA? ALAM MONG ISANG COPY LANG 'YON!" pasigaw kung wika kay Ash.

Sa kaniya kasi namin iniwan ang kopya ng poem na ginawa namin noong Saturday. Pero nawala niya raw. Hindi niya mahanap o kahit maalala kung saan niya ito nalagay. Iyon lang naman kasi ang tanging copy namin. Nawala rin sa isip kong i-picture. Tsk! Nakakabwesit!

Nakayuko lang siya. Hindi nagsasalita. Hindi man lang nag abalang ie-explain kung bakit at paano nawala. Habang si Nerd ay tahimik lang na nakatingin sa gawi namin. Parang wala lang sa kaniya na nawawala ang copy ng poem namin. Habang ako, heto nag aalburuto sa inis. Sino bang hindi? Hindi ako naka-train noong sabado, dagdagan pa ang pagkikita namin ni Mr. Anderson na siyang bumagabag sa akin ng ilang araw.

"I'm sorry, Blaire. Hindi ko sinasadya. Hindi ko talaga maalala kung saan ko nailagay iyon."

"You better find it or else, you'll be held accountable with i—" Naputol ang sasabihin ko nang marinig namin ang boses ni ma'am.

"Kayong tatlo, bakit nasa labas pa kayo? Pumasok na kayo para makapagsimula na tayo sa performance task ninyo." Nila, wala na 'yong poem namin.

Wala na kaming nagawa tatlo kung 'di sundin ang sinabi ni Ma'am.

"Good afternoon class!" Miss Famielle greeted.

"Good afternoon, Miss Famielle!" masiglang wika ng lahat maliban saming tatlo.

Hays. I'm not really that grade conscious, I actually don't give a damn care about my grades, I'm just a little bit of disappointed. Since we made that poem and it became nothing because he forgot where he did put it.

"So, alam naman ninyo na ngayon na ipe-perform ang Poem ninyo, hindi ba? Ang gagawin niyo ay pumili kayo ng isa sa inyo para magpresent nito. Dapat magaling siyang magsalita dahil ang may pinakamataas na puntos ang mae-exempt sa isang summative. Criteria will be..."

Hindi ko na pinakinggan pa ang sumunod na mga sinabi ni Ma'am Fam. Para sa ano pa? Eh wala kaming ipe-perform na poem. Wala na 'yong poem na ginawa namin.

Napagpasyahan kong matulog na lang, bahala na silang dalawa magpaliwanag. Kailangan ko rin naman kumalma, baka hindi ako makapigil at maano ko si Ash.

When the performance started, I heard different voices of my classmates, they starts to recite their own poems. While me, I chose not to listen and sleep on my armchair.

Ilang saglit lang din ay nakatulog ako. Pakiramdam ko tumahimik ang paligid. Ilang minuto rin akong nasa ganoong posisyon hanggang sa naramdaman kong nananaginip na naman ako.

Eto na naman ba 'yong panaginip ko noong nakaraan lang? Iyong tungkol sa kasal. Kung ito rin naman ay ayoko nang managinip.

I heard someone's voice, a not-so-baritone voice but it is clear and loud enough. And he was citing a poem, wait?—

A poem? I'm sure it was a poem. Tsk! Pati sa panaginip ko 'yong poem pa rin naiisip ko. Ano ba 'yan?

As I fall into the earth , I saw no beauty.

I found no bright that could light my way.

Everything seems so unclear,

I only heard everyone's laughter.

This is—

I don't know why, yet I still wonder-

Wonder why I can only saw a woman with an eyes of glitter?

Like it made my heart beat fast of intensity,

And turn my sadness into merry

Ang boses na 'yon—familiar at ang sarap pakinggan. Parang musika na nagpapadama ng samu't saring emosyon. Simple lang ito pero may kung anong mahika ang nakabalot sa kaniyang boses.

In my world of emptiness,

Here come your presence of happiness.

Even sometimes your joke wasn't funny,

Don't worry I'm still happy—

Happy seing you being crazy.

Parang may kung anong mensahe ang gustong iparating. Tila napanting pa lalo ang tainga at napokus ang atensyon ko sa pakikinig sa kaniya.

But seriously,

You made me felt happy in your sweetness.

In a kind of your own creativeness.

Parang nang e-engganyo siya na makinig. Hindi naman siya nabigo dahil nakuha niya talaga ang atensyon ko.

Tanging dilim lang ang nakikita ko. Am I still dreaming? If it is, I don't want to wake up yet.

Under the shadow of my dream,

Still, I can't believe that it's really happening.

Should I stop or should I be still?

I'm scared but you're my happy little pill.

I'm scared coz' I don't know if it is real.

His voice, it seems familiar. Not sure if I've heard it before.

And I don't know if you made it just to have a thrill.

Oh God! I want to scream!

It is real or still just a dream?

Gosh! Ang ganda talaga pakinggan. How can someone recite a poem with so much emotions on his tone? This is the first time I got amazed by someone reciting a poem. And to be honest, whoever this is, he got a talent.

Leaning my head on your shoulder,

Everything became brighter.

I thought I'm still dreaming that time,

So, I closed my eyes and felt so fine.

As your hand cozy touched the hand of mine,

It leads me open up my eyes, you're really here by my side.

So, I slowly inhaled some air,

And feel the moment that we're together.

Naramdaman kong may tumapik sa likod ko. I didn't bother to wake up at first pero nasundan ulit iyon ng ilan pang tapik sa likod ko. Agad kong naiangat ang ulo ko at handang tapunan na ng masamang tingin kung sino man ang demonyong gumising sa akin. Kahit na panag—

I was fall coz' you let me in.

I was fall coz' since before I already felt something-

Something that I can't explain.

His eyes met mine. Our gaze locked as he continue what he was doing. He didn't leave my gaze nor got bothered by my stare. We continues staring each other, while me, sitting here in my chair and him standing infront and expressing his self through a poem.

Something that I thought it would be fail,

Something that maybe it would be wasted-

Wasted coz' I thought you can't notice.

I'm not insane but I'm in love again,

And this happiness I feel will always remain.

Teka hindi 'yon panaginip? Ang narinig kong boses na nag-re-recite ng poem? Hindi iyon panaginip??

Along this journey of my life,

Can you please stay here by my side?

You're my Yes in my every No.

And you're the answers in every questions too.

Even I don't know if it is true,

Tanging gulat at paghanga ang namumutawi sa puso ko. Paano siya?

The words he chose and the emotions he used made the performance perfect! Never thought he can be like that.

But I always see myself thinking of you,

And it lead my lips to curve for a smile,

While my heart shouting your name with desire.

Napako ang tingin ko sa mini-stage na ginawa ng aking mga kaklase. With his pale skin, he shines a like star standing in that stage. This time, he's not wearing his eyeglass. He is standing there with a face full of different emotions. His eyes are directly looking at me, wait me?

"Nag a-assume ka na naman, Gold," saad ng isang parte ng utak ko.

I may not be the man that you've wish for,

But I'll be the man that will last and love you forever more.

Napakalayo sa poem na ginawa namin. Hindi ko alam pero mukhang galing sa puso niya ang mga salitang binabanggit. Idagdag pa ang nakakahipnotismo ang boses niya ngayon.

And if your down, I can be your comfort wall.

Where you can lean your head and say it all,

Until your tears will fall,

And everything become lull.

Is this real?

Wala ni isa sa aming dalawa ang bumitaw sa titigan. Gusto kong alisin ang tingin ko pero parang ayaw makisama ng mga mata kong titig na titig sa kaniya.

Gosh, what's happening to me?

Remember, when darkness will attempts to conquer,

I can be a light that will make your world brighter.

Ngayon ko lang siya nakitaan ng ibang emosyon. Maliban kasi sa poker face ay ni minsan hindi ko nakita na ngumiti o nasasaktan o nagagalit ang kaniyang mukha, siguro iyong beses sa bodega na ngumisi siya

But now? I'm seeing sincerity and love in his eyes but sadness and pain at the same time.

Nothing matters, really,

Like I'll never leave you and walk away.

You are the lyrics of my song.

And the subject of this poem.

You are the dream of my own,

My nirvana from now till soon.

In this blinding light, now I found the real beauty.

Saglit siyang tumigil at saka bahagyang ngumiti.

And that beauty is because of that simple BIRTHDAY..

Why I feel like this poem was written for me?

Why does my heart beating this so darn fast?

Why it's like a damn perfect?

Why he's still looking at me?

Why?

Fuck!

Nag-bow siya bago umalis sa stage at agad na bumalik sa kinauupuan niya, sa kanang bahagi ko. Samantalang nasa kaliwa ko si Ash na wala ring imik. Natahimik ang buong klase. Wala ni isang nagsalita. Tila napipi kaming lahat.

Walang ano-ano, biglang tumayo si Ma'am at naglakad papunta sa mini-stage. At pumalakpak ito, parang go signal 'yon sa amin kaya pumalakpak na rin kami. Inaamin kong sobrang ganda ng ginawa niya. Damang-dama ang bawat linyang binibitawan niya. Walang binatbat sa ginawa naming poem. Maybe, they were right, everything has a reason, kaya nawala 'yong copy ng poem namin dahil God wants us to hear his hidden talent. God wants him to share his talent.

I didn't expect that nerd to be this talented.

"Halata naman siguro kung sino ang may pinagkamagandang poem, class?" Tumango sila kahit ramdam kong gusto nilang sila ang manalo para ma-exempt sa summative niya.

"Reiz, I didn't know you have such talent in literature. I suggest you should nurture it more so you can be great at it."

"Thanks, Miss. Pero ang totoo niyan, hindi lang ako ang sumulat ng poe—"

"I know. Your groupmates are Miss Ilthrov and Mr. Sanchez, right?" Miss Fam asked while looking at the small index card she was holding.

"Yes, but—" Nerd look at our direction again. I know what's his pointing our, so I lightly nod at him to give him a go signal to do it.

After all, that's the truth. Pangit naman kung makikinabang lang kami ni Ash.

"Hindi sadyang naiwala po namin ang poem na nagawa namin noong Sabado. Ang original poem po. At iyong ni-recite ko ay ang poem na gawa namin ng bestfriend kong si Shairene Fortunado. Last minute na po para gumawa kami ng bago kaya naisip kong iyon ang gamitin at payag naman si Shairene roon."

"It was a collaboration with your best friend named Shairene Fortunado, right? So if exempt your group from the quiz then don't you think it might unfair to your part?"

"I know, Ma'am. But I've said, we didn't intend to lost it. If you exempt my group, then I don't have any problem to it. I still see it as perfectly equal for the 3 of us."

"What was the title of the poem?"

"Under the Shadow of My Dream, Ma'am."

A silence invaded the room after Nerd explain. It didn't took long when Miss Fam decided.

"I see, Reiz. Okay, group of Santos, Ilthrov at Sanchez, kayo ang exempted sa summative. The rest aralin ninyo ang chapter 4 and 5 and prepare for the test tomorrow."

Nerd's name is Reiz, huh!

Reiz Santos, I'm sure you're not just a nerd but then job well done!