LET GO AND MARRY ME

CHAPTER 3

Ellie:

“Monday” Bulong ko sa sarili ko pagkagising ko.

Start of the week, I am working as a procurement manager for a multinational company in Makati.

Nolan always picks me up and drop me off work then pick me up again after work. It is already our daily routine.

“Good morning Hon” Bati ko kay Nolan.

“Good morning Honey” bati niya sabay halik sakin.

“Hon, I have a meeting later at around 4:30 pm. Late kita masusundo sa office, hintayin mo ako” Nolan informs me.

I just nodded at him and said okay.

We both have stable and fulfilling careers at our age. I am 31 and Nolan is 32, he works as operations manager for a shared service or BPO company. I am actually thankful that he works regular working hours, the same as me.

Honestly, I am looking forward to us settling down. However, it seems that Nolan still has a lot of going on in his life and has not thought of settling down yet. And I am more than willing to wait for him but sana naman bago magexpire ang uterus ko eh maisipan na niyang bumuo kami ng pamilya.

“Here we are hon. Wait for me later, let’s have dinner. I’ll go ahead. Love you” sabi niya sakin bago ako bumaba ng kotse niya.

“Sige. Love you too. Ingat ka sa pagdrive” sabi ko sa kanya.

Pagpasok ko sa office binati agad ako ni Mikee. She is my bestfriend, magkabarkada kami since college then we decided to work for the same company.

“Babae ka, madami akong email sayo. I need your opinion on those” Sabi niya sakin.

Tumango lang ako at dumiretso na sa office ko. Mikee is a supervisor under my department pero never naging issue samin ang position sa work kahit sabay kaming pumasok sa company. Maya-maya sumunod siya sakin sa office at sinara ang pinto.

“Ano? Ang aga aga chichismis ka na naman ha.” Sabi ko sa kanya

“Gaga ka! Wag ka magkunwari interesado ka din naman sa mga chicka ko” Sagot niya sakin na nagpatawa samin dalawa.

“May itatanong lang ako sayo babae ka”

“Ano yun?” sagot ko sa kanya.

“Kamusta na kayo ni Nolan? Lately, napapansin ko na you’ve been quiet about him ah. Is there something wrong. May ginawa na naman ba siya?”

“Mikee” tapos huminga ako ng malalim.

“I want to get married” sabi ko sa kanya. Tinitigan lang niya ako matapos kong sabihin yun.

“Did he ask for your hand already?” She asked, then umiling ako as an answer to her.

Humugot siya ng hininga bago siya magsalit. “Paano ka magpapakasal kung yung jowa mo mukhang hindi pa handang magpatali. Have you tried to talk to him about your plans for your future?”

“No.”

“Then talk to him.” Tapos tumahimik na kaming dalawa hanggang sa umalis siya.

Buong araw yun lang ang iniisip ko. Sinisigurado ko sa sarili ko na bago ko siya kausapin, eh yun talaga ang gusto ko.

I waited for Nolan. He messages me saying na he will pick me up at around 7:30 pm.

Dumiretso kami ni Nolan sa greenbelt for dinner. Pareho kaming hindi maluho ni Nolan, kahit ba pareho kaming sumasahod ng maayos at ang mga pamilya naman namin ay may mga kaya din at hindi naman umaasa samin. Pero mas gusto pa rin namin madalas sa simple lang.

We decided to eat at Pepper Lunch pero pagdating naming dun nagkatinginan kami sabay tawa then turn our back and made our way to Jollibee. As I said simple lang kaming dalawa pero hindi naman namin dinedeprive ang sarili namin kapag gusto namin.

Siya na ang nagorder habang humahanap ako ng table, umupo na ako nung may makita ako na malapit lang sa glass window.

After he ordered, we started eating while telling each other how our day went.

“Hon, do you want to go to Baguio this weekend?” He asked me.

Nagisip muna ako if I have something to do pero wala naman so I said yes. I looked at him for a while then talk to him.

“Hon, can I ask you something” Sabi ko.

“Oo naman. Ano yun?”

“hmmm…have you already thought about our future? I mean do you have any plans.”

Tinignan muna niya ako, then he smiles.

“Of course, hon. Iniisip ko din naman ang future natin. I know and I feel that you have been waiting for me. I really do think about it pero hon I hope you understand that I want to be really ready before we take another step in our relationship.”

Tinititigan ko lang siya, I was a bit sad pero hindi ko pinahalata at ngumiti lang ako sa kanya.

“Are you mad?” He asked. Napansin niya siguro na bigla akong nanahimik na.

“Of course not. Don’t worry I do understand.” Then we smiled at each other.

After the dinner, hinatid na niya ko then he stayed muna sa condo. I feel na he is guilty sa sinabi niya sakin kanina.

“Hon, do you really understand what I told you earlier?” tanong niya sakin habang nakaupo kami.

I look at him and smile. “Yes. I just hope na maging ready ka na bago pa magexpire ang bahay bata ko ha” biniro ko na lang siya, na nakapagpatawa naman sa kanya ng malakas.

“I promise hon you won’t wait too long. Okay?” tumango ako. Nagdecide siya na hindi na lang umuwi at dun na sa condo matulog.

While Nolan is taking his shower, his phone ring. I was tempted to look at it pero pilit kong pinipigilan ang sarili ko kasi alam kong mali.

Sa huli I decided to look at it. Sa isip ko titignan ko lang naman kung sino eh. Then I found his phone and there I saw the message sender’s name. It was Jane, she was one of his close friends from his work. Then nung ilalapag ko na sana yung phone niya, bigla naman lumabas si Nolan. He was eyeing me.

“What are you doing?” He asks.

“Your phone ring, I just look at it.”

“Why?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing? You look at my phone then tell me it is nothing. Iniisip mo ba na may iba na naman akong katext?”

I keep quiet. Totoo naman kasi, hindi ko man aminin pero yun ang tumatakbo lagi sa isip ko.

“This is bullshit Ellison! Kelan ka ba makakamove on sa nangyari 3 years ago?”

“Damn! That was 3 years ago! Hanggang ngaun ba naman!” Pikon na sabi sakin ni Nolan.

“You are unbelievable Ellison. Nakakabaliw na yang pagkaparanoid mo. Kahit na ang kausap ko ay pamilya ko you still look at me with suspicion and think that it was someone else. When do you plan to let go of that incident?”

Hindi na ako nakatiis na tumahimik. “Hindi ko alam! Kung hindi mo kasi sana ginawa hindi sana tayo ganito!”

“What?! Ilang beses na kong humingi ng tawad sayo. So do you think it will do us good if we get married ng hindi mo pa din kaya ilet-go yang issue na yan.”

“Ano? Bakit? May plano ka ba talagang pakasalan ako?” balik kong sabi sa kanya.

“Hanggat ganyan ka! Wala! Hindi kita pakakasalan!” Nagkatinginan kami. I know nagulat din siya sa sinabi niya kasi halatang halata sa reaksyon ng mukha niya.

“I’ll take my leave. Uuwi na lang ako so we can both calm ourselves.”

Umalis na siya habang nakatulala lang ako at hindi na nakapagreact sa sinabi niya.