Single Lady Series

Chapter 18

It’s official! Ivan and I were in a relationship. I can’t contain the happiness that I’m feeling right now!

He’s my first boyfriend. I know and he knows na nangangapa pa ako sa gantong bagay lalo na at may limitations ako sa bahay. Kaya naman iniintinidi niya ako palagi. Imagine a man who can get what he wants easily is now almost tame by me.

At the beginning of our relationship, I already told him that my parents do not agree in me having a relationship with a man. Luckily he said to me that he’s willing to wait until maipakilala ko siya.

Months after, we’re still happy. There is always an improvement in everything we do. At first I won’t allow him to even hold my hand. Nahihiya ako na baka pasmado ang kamay ko at maasiwa siya sa paghawak but, later on nakasanayan ko na.

I am happy to be with him all the time. I feel like, for months that we’ve been together, he improved. Madalas na siya na mismo ang lumalayo sa mga babaeng lumalapit sakanya. Kung kailangan naman niya makipag-usap talaga sa babae, he’s always asking for my permission.

My friends also saw Ivan’s improvement. They told me that Ivan changed a lot, that they are okay with my relationship with him.

The bullies are officially gone too, pero si Lorry ewan ko ba. Madalas pa rin siya magparinig sa akin. Muka siyang bitter dahil sa hinabahaba ng panahon na nagpaimpress siya kay Ivan, hindi pa rin siya pinapansin.

Si Antony naman mas lalo pang dumalas ang pag-absent. Trixie is in the hospital for months. Sobrang lumala na ang sakit niya. Naaawa ako kay Antony dahil napapabayaan niya na ang sarili niya at pag-aaral niya para kay Trixie. I can’t blame him for his decisions. He really love Trixie that much kaya ganon.

Boss what do you want to eat? He ask me

Kahit ano lang love…ikaw na ang bahala. I said to him while smiling.

Okay, wait for me here. He said then leave and went to the line.

Edi sana ol may bumibili ng pagakain diba? Natatawa naman akong nilingin si Jai sa sinabi niya.

She’s always like that kapag may sweet moments kami ni ivan. Simpleng bagay lang lagi niya nang sinasabi ang ‘sana ol’.

Kung pinayagan mo kasi si Jerome na pumunta dito edi sana hindi ka nagsasana ol. Natatawa kong sabi sakanya.

Hay nako Krisha. Paganyan ganyan lang yan si Jai pero gusto din niyan ang presensya ni Jerome. Ani Pyok

Hoy Pyok Hindi ha! Sawang-sawa na nga ako sa mukha non eh. Isang linggo na akong nakatira sakanila at ang sakit niya sa ulo! Inis na sabi Jai.

Jai is currently staying in Ivan’s family mansion. Napagkasunduan daw kasi ng pamilya nila na magsama sila para mas makilala pa nila ang isa’t isa.

After a minute, I stare at Ivan who’s walking towards our table. Ilang beses na akong naaamaze kay Ivan, the way he walk, stand, smirk and laugh, even his serious face…Nahuhulog lalo ako sakanya.

Nang makarating na siya sa lamesa namin ay ibinigay niya na sa akin ang pagkaing binili niya at nagsimula na kaming kumain.  

I ate my food peacefully. Walang bully at kung anu-anong eksena na nangyayari. This is the meal I wanted whenever I eat. Yung masaya kasama ang kaibigan at syempre kasama siya.

Matapos kumain ay bumalik na kami sa room. Nasa hallway pa lang kami ng biglang hawakan ni Ivan ang kamay ko.

I looked at him and raise our hands.

Ano to? I ask him Baka may makakita sa atin love, alam mo naman na bawal PDA dito sa school! Naiilang kong sabi sakanya.

He looked at me and smirk before he open his mouth.

I don’t care about the school rules boss. Rules mo lang ang mahalaga sa akin. He said then winked at me.

Hinila niya naman ako lalo papalapit sakanya at pinalibot niya naman ang braso sa bewang ko.

Sanay na ako sa mga ganitong galawan ni Ivan. He told me that it’s his love action towards me. Naniniwala daw kasi siya na words are not enough to tell how much he love me. That’s why kahit naiilang ako ay hinahayaan ko na lang siya.   

Days passed at ganon pa din kami. We are always together at parang hindi mapaghiwalay.

Malapit ng matapos ang third grading namin. Kaya naman lahat ng subject ay binigyan kami ng sandamakmak na projects at activity.

Medyo hindi na kami masyadong nagsasama ni Ivan dahil most of the time, I am with friends, talking about our projects. Kung di naman mga kaibigan ko ang kasama ko, mga groupmates ko naman.

Right now my friends and I are busy in our project in one of our subject. Kailangan kasi naming gumawa ng sayaw.

Hindi kami magkagrupo ni Ivan dahil ang grupo nila ay inatasan na gumawa ng kanta.

Hindi kami nagkakasama kapag nasa school kami. Nagsasama man pero kapag kakain lang.

Boss hindi ka ba sasabay sa akin uuwi mamaya? Ivan asked me.

Sorry love, ngayon kasi namin gagawin yung sayaw namin eh. I said to him with a sad face.

Can I come with you? Saglit lang naman yon diba?

I am not sure Love, tatanungin ko muna sila Khris kung pwede ka ba na pasamahin.

Magpapaalam na sana ako sa mga kaibigan ko ng hawakan ni Ivan ang braso ko.

He’s face is serious and he looks so furious. Why is he mad?

Bakit kailangan mo pang magpaalam sakanila?

Kasi love baka gusto nila na kami lang muna ang magkakasama…malumanay kong sabi sakanya.

Muka namang hindi nagustuhan ni Ivan ang sinabi ko sakanya kaya naman nag iba ang timpla ng muka niya.

So they’re more important than me? Sabi ni Ivan ng may naiinis na boses.

No…no love, hindi naman sa ganon.

Eh parang yun kasi yung napapansin ko eh! The time that we must spend together is not enough because you’re busy with your friends…Ano? Girlfriend ba talaga kita? sigaw niya saakin.

Sa tagal na buwan naming magkasama, ngayon niya na lamang ulit ako sinigawan. The last time was when my friends are mad at me. Bukod doon wala na.

Ivan… hindi ako makikipaglaro lang sakanila. We’ve been busy for this past few days. Kung ganoon ako ganon ka din. Why can’t you understand that? Nagsusumamong saad ko sakanya.

Busy di ako Krisha! Sigaw niya sa muka ko. But I made sure that I always make time for you! Hindi ko yon sinumbat sayo! Mag effort ka naman! Sasama lang ako sainyo, bakit kailanga ko pa ng permiso ng kaibigan mo?

Naluluha akong tumingin sakanya. Is my effort not enough for him? Kailangan ba nasakanya lang ang buong oras ko? Ang buong mundo ko, para masabi na mahal ko siya?

Wala na akong nagawa. He’s really mad right now, at kung hindi ko siya pagbibigyan ay baka ito pa ang maging pinaka-unang malala naming away.

Okay…I’ll tell them na sasama ka sa amin. Is it okay to you? Pagsuyo ko sakanya.

He’s still looking at me with a bloodshot eyes. I waited for him to answer but I guess he’s still not over with our fight.

I went to my friends and tell them na sasama si Ivan sa practice. At first hindi pumayag si Jai pero ng sabihin ko sakanila na pinipilit talaga ni Ivan sumama, wala na silang nagawa.

As long as kaya kong intindhin ang lahat, gagawin ko para hindi kami mag-away ni Ivan. I need to adjust for him. He made a big adjustment so that I can fit in his world. Kung gusto ko na magtagal kami ay dapat na ganoon din ako sakanya.

We went to Pyok’s house. It is my first time in their house at sobrang namamangha ako sa interior na meron sila. Sa living room pa lang ay makikita na ang isang malaking frame ng isang ginang, kasama ang asawa nito, si Khris at ang kapatid nitong lalaki.

The big living room was full of white and gold colored motif. Ang daming magagandang muwebles na makikita sa buong bahay. Iba talaga ang mayayaman.

Guys sa poolside na lang tayo mag practice para hindi masyadong mainit. Ani Pyok.

Dumiretso na kami sa poolside nila. Malaki ang pool nila at may space na Malaki para makapag practice kami.

I went to the near table and put my things there. I looked into Ivan who’s sitting in the chair near me and went onto him.

Magpapractice lang kami…okay ka lang ba dito? I asked him.

He didn’t look at me and just drink his orange juice. Mukang galit pa rin siya sa akin.

Bagsak ang balikat na pinuntahan ko ang mga kaibigan . I should do something about us, but for now, magpapractice muna ako.

We practiced the whole one hour. Nakakapagod pero napagkasunduan namin na tapusin ang buong steps para sa mga sumunod na araw ay practice na lamang para magkasabay-sabay.

Nang mapagod kami ay umupo muna kami sa upuan at nagpahatid ng meryenda si Pyok.

Pinuntahan ko si Ivan sa pwesto nito. He’s scrolling into his phone. I stared at him for a minute before I decided to talk to him.

Love…are you still mad at me? Naglalambing na tanong ko sakanya.

He didn’t answer me and just continue on scrolling. I tapped him in his shoulder para mapansin niya ako. He looked at me for a second then looked away. I crotched and leveled my face into him before holding his hands.

Hey love…bati na tayo please…I love you. I whispered to him.

When he heard the three words he then looked at me. I smiled at him and he just sighed. He felt defeated when he heard the magic word. I giggled and hug him.

Bibigay ka din naman pala sa akin. I told him

He hugged me tightly like he doesn’t want to stop and let go of me. I pushed him and faced him.

Hindi ka na ba galit? He nodded to me.

Okay na ba tayo? I asked him and he nodded again.

He’s acting like a five year old now. Kanina lang para siyang luging-lugi.

Matapos naming magpractice ay napagpasyahan na namin na umuwi. Hinatid ako ni Ivan pero hanggang kanto lang at kailangan ko pang mag tricycle.

I allow him na ihatid ako dahil nag-aalala daw siya sa akin. Kaya lang hindi ko siya pinayagan na ihatid ako hanggang bahay kaya hanggang kanto lang niya ako hinahatid.

I got home with a smile plastered on my face. I am really happy na nagkaayos kaagad kami ni Ivan. There are times na nagkakatampuhan but, in the end para na lang kaming tanga na nagtatawanan habang magkayakap.

A week passed, I thought hindi na ulit kami mag-aaway. Mas tumindi ang mga pinapagawa sa amin. I am busy with my baby research, book review and movie review etc. kaya naman mas lalo kaming nawalan ng oras ni Ivan para sa isa’t isa.

Madalas na kaming mag-away, he’s always demanding for my time even though busy rin siya.

He doesn’t understand my situation that’s why we are always fighting. May isang beses pa nga na bigla niya na lang ako sinigawan at iniwan.

He always blame my friends for everything. He’s telling me that I don’t prioritize him anymore, that I allotted most of my time with my friends. Well in fact it’s not true. Kung kaya ko lang pagsabayin ang lahat baka ginawa ko na.

Buong araw nasa school ako. Sa gabi ginagawa ko naman ang lahat ng assignments at natitirang project na malapit na ang due date. How can I balance my time with him if I also have curfew in our house?

Natapos ang araw ko ng magkaaway kaming dalawa. Syempre hindi niya ako hinatid dahil matindi ang galit niya saakin.

Ano ba yan si Ivan! Muka bang inaagaw namin ang oras mo? Nangigigil ako sa jowa mo Krisha, nako pag di ako nakapagpigil mabubungangaan ko yan! Gigil na sabi ni Jai

Matagal na silang naiinis kay Ivan dahil sinisisi sila nito. Kung dati ay tuwang tuwa sila pagbabago nito, ngayon naman ay naiinis at nagagalit na sila. They’re right though, Ivan is being arrogant and possessive to me. Gusto niya na ang atensyon ko ay laging nasa kanya. Minsan nga kahit pag-aaral ko kinaiinisan niya. Kaya naman grabe ang paghihimutok ni Jai.

Jai is right, Krisha. Your relationship with Ivan is becoming more toxic. Hindi na healthy ang relationship niyo dahil sakanya. Ani Jess

Sinangayunan naman ni Khris ang sinasabi nila Jess at jai sa akin. Ayoko mang sabihin sakanila pero yun din ang naiisip ko. Kaya lang masyado kong mahal si Ivan para isipin pa yon.

What’s more important is makipag-ayos ako sakanya. Sa ngayon I need to focus on my studies. Babawi ako sakanya promise.

Months passed at mas lalo kaming nagkakalabuan ni Ivan. Malapit na ang Christmas vacation at nag-aaway pa din kami. I always talked to him and promise him na babawi ako pero mas lalo lang siyang naiinis sakin. Madalas sabihin niya sa akin na

Tama na Krisha! You’re always telling me na babawi ka pero buwan na ang lumipas pero di mo pa rin magawa! He shouted at me.

Tatapusin ko lang lahat ng kailangan tapusin Ivan and I promise and ensure you na babawi ako. I’ll make it up to you okay? I promise you. I said to him, pleading to understand me and my situation.

Alam mo mag break na lang tayo! Nagsasawa na ako sa excuses mo! He shouted at me again

Ivan… please understand my situation. You know its also not easy for me to multi task everything. I promise you, babawi ako!

Before Christmas vacation, I spend most of my time to Ivan. My friends agreed to my decision na pakisamahan at mag bigay pa ng maraming oras kay Ivan. So I did that.

Madalas na nalelate na ako ng uwi sa bahay at napapagalitan ako ni papa at mama. I always tell them that I’m busy with school works…that I need to participate in my group activities.

Most of the time, they won’t buy my excuses. If that happened, lagi akong padabog na pumupunta sa kwarto ko.

Two days before the break, lagi na kami ni Ivan pumupunta sa bahay nila. Tita, his mother, is always happy with my appearance in their house. Giliw na giliw siya tuwing pumupunta ako sa bahay nila.

Iha buti dumalaw ka ulit…she said to me with her arms wide open, telling me to embrace her.

Si Ivan po kasi tita gusto ng quality time sa akin…malapit na po kasi ang Christmas break at matagal-tagal po kaming hindi magkikita at magsasama. I said to her shyly.

Kahit na madalas kong nakakasama ang mama ni Ivan, I’m still intimidated with her looks and aura. I’m just lucky that she likes me for her son. Kung magtagal man kami ni Ivan ay siya ang isa sa mga taong magiging masaya para saamin.

Mom…Ivan entered the dining area. Can I take Krisha with me now? Aakyat na po kami sa taas. Ani niya sa mama niya.

Oh sure son. I’ll just call you later for dinner.

After her mother said that, we went upstairs and walked straight to his room.

Pagbukas ng pintuan ay bumungad kaagad saakin ang mabangong amoy ng kanyang kwarto. His room is very manly. I’m glad when I first entered his room, it’s very clean. The color of the wall matches the color of his king size bed and the books are well arranged. Nakapasok na din ako sa walked in closet niya na sobrang laki. Masasabi ko na para sa isang lalaking kagaya niya, masyado siyang malinis at maayos sa lahat ng gamit niya.

I sit in the couch beside his bed. Kinuha ko ang cellphone ko sa aking bag at nag text kanila mama na malelate ulit ako ng uwi.

Ivan come to me and cuddled with me. Ganito lang kami ni Ivan madalas pag nasa bahay nila. Nag-uusap at madalas na nagyayakapan.

Wala naman kaso sa akin ang ginagawa niya dahil nakatatak na sa akin na boyfriend ko siya at normal lang ang ganitong bagay.

Boss saan nga ulit kayo pupunta sa Christmas? Ivan asked me.

Sa Bulacan love. May family reunion kami ng mga tita ko at ibang relatives. I said to him while scrolling into my phone.

When I’m with him, I always use my phone to divert my attention. Minsan kasi iba ang kinikilos ni Ivan. There are times that he’s being touchy to me. Hindi naman sa hindi ko yon gusto pero nag-iingat pa din ako.

Ilang araw kayo dun? He asked me again then start smelling my hair.

Uhmm I don’t know…maybe two or three days. Naiilang na tugon sa kanya.

His lips went into my nape and started kissing it slowly. Hindi pa kami umaabot sa ganitong part ni Ivan. I do kiss him but not in lips.

Ano Ivan…baka tinatawag na tayo ng mommy mo sa baba…tara baba na tayo. Kinakabahang sabi ko sakanya.

Tatayo na sana ako ng biglang hilahin ni Ivan ang kamay ko at naupo ako sa lap niya. My God, I can feel his bulge!

Boss, mom is not calling us…kung tinatawag man niya tayo, I’ll tell them na bababa din tayo.

I Know kung saan hahantong ang ginagawa ni Ivan ngayon. I can also feel the heat but it’s not yet the right time!

Without knowing, I suddenly noticed that he already unclasped my bra. He’s touching my peaks at wala man lang akong magawa.

He kissed my collar bone, neck then he went to my lips. Nanghihina ako sa gingawa niya sa akin. I can’t do anything because I can feel that my body also wants what he’s doing to me.

He’s my first kiss. Hindi ko alam kung tama ba ang ginagawa ko but I just go with the flow. I can’t control myself and started to moan.

He’s just touching me and yet I’m turned on! His hands went down there and feel my hidden thing inside that piece of cloth.

Ahh…because of what he did, I suppressed a soft moan.

I need to stop or else hindi na ito matitigil. Hinawakan ko ang dalawang braso ni Ivan at pinilit ko siyang ilayo. Hindi tama itong ginagawa namin. Ayokong magpadala sa nararamdaman ko. Ayokong magsisi sa huli…

Ivan did not stop and continue touching me. I can feel his excitement from what he’s doing to me.

I tear fell into my eyes. Hindi ko na nagugustuhan ang ginagawa niya. Masyado na siyang nagiging agrisibo.

Ivan stop it! I pushed him but he won’t budge. Ano ba Ivan tumigil kana! I said and pushed him.

He stopped and looked at me. He saw my eyes, covered with tears. Lumapit siya sa akin at umupo sa tabi ko.

Lumayo ako sakanya sa takot na maulit ulit ang ginawa niya.

Boss…I’m sorry. Nadala lang ako boss. He said then he covered his face with his both hands.

He tried to reach my hand but I stand up and moved far from him.

Don’t go near me, Ivan…

Boss, I’m really sorry...I can’t stop my body from wanting you…He looked at me while saying that.

Without saying a word. I run away straight to their gate and wait for a tricycle.

I didn’t even bother to say a goodbye to his mother.

Nang maaninag ko ang tricycle ay agad ko tong pinara at sumakay para maka-uwi sa bahay.