Romance of the Playboy

CHAPTER 11

CHELLERINE

I am at ease as I grope the surface. I slowly open my eyes until it gets clear and saw the man beside me now letting to lean on his chest.

How did I slept when I skip almost of my class?

Lumayo ako sa kaniya at tumayo upang kumuha ng tubig. Hindi pa siya gumagalaw kung kaya hinayaan ko na muna itong matulog.

He've been through and looks exhausted because he did not feel I loosen up into his grip bound. I refresh my thoughts by thinking how I just made slept with him here.

"Pinapabigay ni Mr. President" I suffocately turn around to face her. Hindi ko alam na may kasama kami, hindi ko napansin dahil sa tahimik ng silid.

I grab it and wee at her. This box may contained foods, kumain na kaya siya.

"Did he already ate lunch?" Umiling siya bago nagpaalam na aalis na. May ginagawa sila, due to their hectic yet pile of task they need to conduct to avoid the chasing the time as possible.

Bumalik ako habang dala ang basong may laman pa ng tubig at sa kabila ay bitbit ang plastic na may lamang kahon sa loob.

I sit where I were lay up but the distance are rendering between us. Sa kaniya galing ito at dapat siya rin ang kakain nito. Iisa lang ang binigay baka magkulang kung maghahati pa kami.

Nakakahiya kung ako ang mauunang kakain samantalang pinabigay pa niya ang pagkain na dapat sana ay sa kaniya.

He needs it most, I prefer to buy for my own. I am glad I can go out and purchased my food along my chosen yet not that unhealthy dahil bawal ang nagtitinda ng mga junk foods.

Fries, royal in a can, and a mango pie are maybe enough. Mabubusog ang katawan ko kahit na ganito ang kainin ko.

"Hindi kana bumalik, bag mo" nakasalubong ko si Yish na nahihirapan sa pagbuhat ng bag ko.

Kinuha ko ito at isinabit sa balikat ko. Hindi ganoon kabigat kung kaya nakakaya naman ng katawan. Yiden or Hievi should be here.

"President called me" hindi na niya ako sinauli.

Nakita ko siyang napakunot ang noo at diretsong napatingin sa akin. Something are flooding upon that look. Too suspicious to not to notice.

This is not the time to elaborate all to her. I can find the right time once I fully solved this and my feelings will be gone and turn into no matter what will happen I won't let my sentimental be meddle.

"Okay, just tell me this is okay" tumango ako kahit na naguguluhan pa rin sa sinabi niya. Implying something I couldn't process and guess what is it due to my brain not functioning. Hindi ko makuha ang sinasabi niya.

She knew but she never let me know. Yish is Yish. Dispute won't exist, she will be my guide but not all time. We share our moments with the boys and giving an advise to each other. I will tell it to them, when it's not that anymore cliché.

"Saan ka nagpunta? Kanina pa kami ginugulo ng Mister mo" Avis is Avira. Hindi ko gusto ang linalabas ng kaniyang bibig.

Nababanasan ako, napahilot ako sa sentido ko bago ko siya nilagpasan. Hindi ko siya sinagot, Kailer is annoying, and overreacting as if I can got out here without his guards whole time giving their sight to me just to not make me let out to their vision.

Tachycardia are dominant to me. Seeing him putting his head to his arm which is at the table. Haywire, he is too scruffy. Kanina lang ay iniwan ko siyang malalim na natutulog.

Too rapid to turn his emotion, reaction, and his lame feeling. Hindi ako mawawala. Aalis ako pero hindi ako mawawala.

Fending off a sight I did before I walk straight to his direction. I need to invite him and do join to take a lunch.

"Sa tingin mo, anong mapapala mo kung gaganiyan ka lang?" I cross my rm and put it acrossly. Looking at him intently in actual and too close is not a normal things to me. Ngayon ko lang ito nagawa.

His glamorous along his luminous eye marked the vibrant and glee. Iniabot ko sa kaniya ang kaninang iniabot sa akin ni Descelia habang katabi nito ang binili ko sa labas.

The absence are further feel the burst of his mate busy work. Each of them holding papers. Kailer only being sitting on his chair and calmly looking at those food I brought.

"You're not eating these" Ipinagpalit niya ang kaninang akala ko ay sa kaniya na ngayon ay naging akin.

Pumuwesto ako kung saan ako napabangon kanina. It is not convenient to act as sophisticated even not I am in front of him. Dominanting the tremble bursting out inside me are gonna wants to pop out and be away far.

"You did not reigned as how my parents treating me like one, Kailer" Umupo ako, bagot kong kinuha ang inilaan niyang dapat kong kainin. This is hell!

Paano ako kakain ng walang fries? Dahan dahan niyang binuksan ang dala ko at inilabas lahat ang laman nito. Gusto kong kunin ang lahat ng iyon.

"Kailer.." I will blame him for this. Ngayong araw lang na hahayaan ko siyang pakialaman ang mga kinakain ko.

Nagdadasal akong wala ng susunod. Kung maaari sanang lumipat ng ibang school, pero nasa kalahati pa lang kami ng buong school year.

"Tell me first what benefits you will may get if I'll let you to eat these?" My reason as my claim is not supported. Hindi ko ito inaasahan.

It's kind of telling an assertion to him. No belief will make him believe that those are my usual food. I slackly taking out from its case the dish.

It's an adobo, a chicken adobo. Hindi naman ito ang kinakain tuwing tanghali. Pero kinakain ko naman but dinner. Inilagay ko sa plato ko ang manok. Drumstick is a meaty part of the chicken. I pierce the fork in it and eating it well.

"That's my favorite"

Hanggang sa matapos ay hindi ako nakakaalis. Gusto kong maghugas ng kamay para maalis ang pagkalagkit nito ngunit inunahan niya sa pamamagitan ng pagbibigay ng wet wipes at tissue.

I want to see those boys.

Mababagot na ako dito. Kung sina Hievi, Yiden, Jedd o kaya ay si Kievane at ang dalawang Liores hindi ako napopoot dito. Parang ako lang na mag-isa, salang kausap, wala ring makausap. I am about to go insane.

I don't want to lose my sanity while still I couldn't hang Kailer over the tree.

No goosebumps should be feel he is just my fellow but different features. I have my own. I owned myself I possessed every inch of it. And he should know that he doesn't care why I'm reminding him too often he should not remain his self in between.

I move and sway my feet when it's tured I switch it. Ulit ulit lang, wala pa ring nagbago. Hindi makaramdam ang lalaking nasa harapan ko.

Must do and spend my time into things where I'm into. Not here wasting my time into nonsense but baffled things. Just made my thoughts drastic to think how to escaped here.

Hindi naman ako naka-detain. May karapatan akong umalis, I can feel someone's foot steps near to the door. It's not a simple but I feel that she is here.

"I'm going out" mabilis akong tumayo, kinuha ang bag ko. Hindi ko inayos ang pinagkainan ko.

Nagmadali akong lumabas na naging sapat naman para maka-salubong ko siya. She is here not for works, she is here for her known property.

Nginitian pa niya ako pero nilagpasan ko siya bago ako ngumiti. Its not my style smiling into someone I am not used to be close on. Somehow she is my forebears, but due to that there's still no reason to return back what she is expecting. I am doing what I feel and just burst it out.

Away from hat office, I sense that my air were fully out through a deep sight. Kanina pa gusto ng katawan ko na makalabas. Hapon na. Wala na akong papasukan.

I received a message coming from Yish and Styno. Styno will fetch me here to have a visit into unfamiliar place. Mas magiging abala na sila sa susunod na mga araw kung saan wala naman ako.

I am spending me whole maybe a month with my family, colleague. Tinanong ko kung nasaan na sila ng kapatid niya para makalabas na kaagad ako. Ayaw kong madatnan ako ng kahit na sino sa mga utusan ng lalaking iyon.

I saw Cyxie walking alone. Mag-isa siya kaya maaari ko siyang lapitan. I also want to have some bond with him maybe, hindi siya masyadong nagsasalita, naka-focus sa iisang bagay, at kung mag-salita man ay iyong importante at kung ano ang iniutos ng nakakataas sa kaniya. Iyon ang napansin ko sa kaniya.

While Kailer, that demon. Nakakagigil isipin na siya pa ang naging malapit sa akin. He is a sinner, I don't want to commit sin. It's a mistake I will probably blame myself at the end.

Suppose to be. I am not the only one thinking these. I am just been dragged by someone I hated, the man I really don't want to see and to converge my path with him.

But now sharing time, an ungrateful moment and the infidelity is sucks. Giving me those f*cking unbearable significant time.

Gusto kong apakan ang mukha niya.

Hindi ko na ito muling nasulyapan dahil na rin sa mga estudyanteng nagsilabasan. If I were at unit I am not eating or maybe cooking some foor. I am fond at different things. It's a bit weird but Styno and Zyron are just go with me.

May utang pa ako sa kanila. Maghintay sila kung gusto nila iyong makuha. I still got no reply back from Styno or Zyron. I am not sure if they are at the school doing projects or doing their things.

I should proclaim my thoughts out. And Mr. Ortega, that Kailer pasalamat na lang ako tinigilan niya ang pagtawag sa akin ng kung anong sumisingit sa butsi niya.

Dumiretso ako sa dati ko lang na ginagawang tambayan upang doon hintayin ang dalawa. Hindi ako makakapaghintay sa loob ng sasakyan nil, if they just gave one of spare key I am not here idly standing while guessing what time will they got out. I want to hang around though it's about to dusk occur.

Pumunta na muna ako sa may bakanteng upuan upang doon na muna magpalipas ng oras. Bumalik ako kahapon at natulog sa apartment, pero huwag na muna ngayon. I feel embarrass, at he time Jiara entered inside the office my mind already chose to stay away from them. Maganda na ang nagigin takbo nito, parang ako lang ang nagiging sabit.

"Alam mo bang kanina pa nagwawala ang lalaking iyon" napahawak ako sa dibdib ko.

This guy having this guts making me feel the drastic nervous. He won't, he should be comfortable and not acting like that. That is not my responsible, to make him calm and to remain as long he wanted.

He is becoming so mean. Hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko. Kung paano ko siya dapat na kausapin. Kahit na anong sabihin ko ay gagawin pa rin niya ang nais niya. He is spoiling his own wants.

"Let him burst out" Cyxie sat beside me. Naalala ko ang kaninang tingin ni Kailer. Too grim and dim, he wants to pour out his wrath. It's not under my care anymore.

Lalayo ako, causing damage is not my aim. I sluggishly stand and walk again. Hindi ako babalik, hindi mapakali ang katawan ko, hindi ito matahimik. Kung alam ko lang na dito ang tungo niya hindi na muna sana akk dumiretso dito kung iyon naman ang ibubungad niya sa akin.

Not that lax the space we served as we walk along. He insist to go back with me. At sa tingin ko ay gusto niyang makasiguro na doon nga ang punta ko. The comelier premises are slowly getting clear, street lights, and the various sizes of minilights scattered around the side walk. Unti-unting nagliliwanang ang paligid kasabay naman nito ang pagsapit ng hapon.

"You know that monster isn't easy to tame, galit sa lahat kapag wala sa mood" Hindi ko alam dahil hindi ko hilig ang katulad ng ginagawa niya.

"Hindi mo kailangang sabihin para malaman ko, he's arrogant conceited and a haughty mean person. I don't like him at wala akong pakialam sa kaniya" nauuna ng kaunti ang mga hakbang niya at doon ako naiinis.

"Kaya pala naglalakad ka ngayon para puntahan siya" that was a sarcastic. I am not here walking to look after him and know how to settle with his abstract mood.

"Kase pinilit mo ako" pinilit niya ako at sinamahan pa na parang hindi ko alam ang daan.

"Hindi kita pinilit pero bakit hindi ka gumawa ng paraan upang hindi ka makapunta?" your words force me to, Cyxie.

He's hunting.

"Walang patutunguhan kung iyan ang gagawin ko, you think that's the right move to maintain myself away far from him?" and to not to be in a same shoes with his path he willing to siege. He want to do his wants even though many are pouring their d*mn eyes with a firm yet full of curiousity look upon us and regarding on what's happening between us.

And definitely not. Gayong binago ko nga ang phone ko pero nananatili at sumisiksik pa rin ang mga magugulong pangyayari sa utak ko. Mahirap pakisabayan ang gusto niyang mangyari.

"Mayroon.. kung paninindigan mo"

Paano? Kung siya mismo ayaw akong tigilan at hayaan. That's the case I cannot be flow on. Kung may paraan lang matagal na sana akong tahimik at maganda lagi ang takbo ng umaga ko.

The villain I can't predict, my opponent. But my body becoming lithe and I don't understand why. Only the way is to avoid pero paano kung palaging ganito. Palaging may susuot na tao para lang ipatawag o kaya ipagpilit na puntahan ko ang amo nila.

That's their problem, and my puzzle I need to weld together as soon as possible is the fate. Obviously I am into it, but how can I survived into each day without letting myself, my body, my mind go with the flow. The little abstract events become this forbid exposed. That's not included.

Kailangan ko na munang alamin kung ano ang pakay ni Roy at bakit nandito sila. Sumasalakay sila ng mga tao, mga kalaban nila. Those deluded people should be face the hell, if I just knew that Lucifer in hell are readying the alveolus for them with the blazing core of fire surrounded. Tatahimik ako at hahayaan na muna ang mga iyon, pero ang makipagsabayan sa sarili kong problema ay nakakagulo lang ng isipan. Nakakabaliw!

"If you know him, you'll be me"

Bumungad sa amin ang mga kasamahan nila sa harap pa lang ng entrance. Why do I feel that this such fierce engulf in face of each them are the only their senior or basically their so-called President Kailer is the mind. That bastard.

Wala nanamang magawa kaya nagwawala. Lagi na lang ba siyang ganito. Sinisira niya ang sarili niyang reputasyon, nasa taas pa naman ang puwesto niya. Sinasayang niya ang pinaghirapan niya. What a spoil guy.

"Just relax, he looks he want to lunge at anytime" those fatal yet ferocious look of him will make anyone feel the shiver and anxiety.

"He'll tame" pagkalabas niya ng pintuan ay sa akin kaagad na tumutok ang kaniyang paningin. He's waiting, he know and this is not right.

Hindi ko pa napapansin si Jiara, marahil ay kasama niya ang mga kaibigan nito at lumabas. Iyon lang ang alam ko, nakikita ko siya pero hindi ko na binibigyan pa ng pansin. Buhay niya iyon.

Bumuntong hininga muna ako bago humakbang papunta sa kaniya. This dork really won't stop make me feel embarrass in front of many. I am sure no one will slip their tongue ang give any false information regarding on what they saw. Hindi ko na pinansin ang iba na nakatingin sa amin. I can feel their eyes, but nothing the hell out of to give them an attention. Kung ano man ang nasa isip nila, wala akong magagawa. I believe in what my ability can do.

"You strike that d*mn mood of yours in front of them Mr. Ortega" a coquettish smirk written on him, I treated it as his nonsense responsed.

Mas lalo niyan inilapit ang katawan ko sa kaniya habang nakapulupot ang braso nito sa bewang ko. Something wants to blown out inside me. I hate it, I hate him for making this unbearable scene, I hate him because of his brazen sudden fuming vehement turn out into like this, and I hate him for making me feel this.

My body just go with him, it was became lithe. Entwine his arm around my waist while I can't do something but sign gesture. Isinawalang bahala niya ang pagpisil ko sa tagiliran niya at mas lalo pa nitong ipinulupot sa aking bewang. It makes me more close to his, he were at my back close to me while his arms wary entwine on my waist. Hindi na ako makakawala nito.

I've been tied into his knot, still I am more irritated as I saw him. His glee face looks so wanting, what a morose of him. Ill-tempered, this man got that.

"Umaalis ka ng walang paalam, you're ditching" As if he really care. Ayaw kong nakikialam siya, but this I can't say I'm getting into it. It just got me.

Anong ibig niyang sabihin? Wala akong ginagawa. Umaalis ako dahil kailangan, staying is the thing I can't able to provide while I still treated it as taboo. Bakit pa niya tinatanong ang tungkol sa bagay na iyon.

He did not ask, but he stated.

I am not numb. Kailer is something getting my limit. He drag me until we get out from the school. It's gloaming time and we aren't waygoing back to our apartment.

This intense sense of mine won't really stop get rid of me. Wala akong nakikitang mali sa pag-uwi ng gabi pero siya ang kasama ko and this is initial but not that primal.

Being pensive at some time is not bad at all. I want to think how can he manage to do this things behind his girlfriend. Did he really love and value their relationship? I want to ask him out but seeing him calm by doing this makes my mouth shut and just be drag by him. It's either we're going in a place he want or if he still have his guts to ask me where I wanted to go.

"My presence is still here. I have rights to ask where we're going" Palinga-linga kong binalingan ang kaliwa at kanang bahagi ko upang tignan kung ano ang itsura nito.

He did not mind my words, instead just continue walking while his arms did not feel tired for keeping it in rolled on my waist. Ako ang nangangalay sa kaniya. Wala talagang kuwentang kausap ang kasama ko. He will unable to ask me out too if he have an intention.

I want him to feel how to be ignored. I am like an existed air but never noticed. That's what I wanted when he never laid his attention to me but this time I want him to notice and give an answer every question messed up in my mind.

"Kung wala kang balak na sabihin ay maaari na ba akong umalis, Styno and Zyron are waiting for me" Napatigil ito sa paglalakad kung kaya pati ako ay napasabay.

I will let him cast all the negativity that are vibing to be in us and liking how we messed up and torn. Pero ang ganito, walang imik ay parang wala akong kasama pero ramdam ko ang pagkakahawak niya sa akin, at ang kaniyang katawan na ngayon ay nakaharap sa akin. This will be an intense fought.

"F*ck" he nuzzled his hair through his both hand and his haywire hair lay down unbothered remain its cleanliness as how he work with it while ago.

".. I don't know" he whispered in absence.

Balisa ako nitong nilingon ako at hinapit ako papalapit sa kaniya. He lean his head to my shoulder and blown out a deep breath. Kasabay nito ang pagpulupot ng kaniyang braso sa bewang ko.

"Something happened right?" bumuntong hininga ito bago nito ibinawi ang ulo.

"Jiara wants me to introduce to her parents" Para akong hindi kaagad na makapag-isip.

He should be happy. I feel dull, I feel like I don't like the idea Jiara will introduce Kailer to her parents, my Aunt and Uncle. I prefer Kailer in pretty poker face.

"The elate, excitement and a bit of nervous should be filled in you, Kailer" paano ako magsasalita ng taliwas kung siya mismo halata ang pagkabigo.

Pero anong dahilan bakit siya nagwala at mukhang galit kanina. Is this also related on it? I want to know more about that, about his plan, about his true feelings, about his real intention to me. Kailangan ko siyang tanungin tungkol doon, kung hindi baka mabaliw ako sa kakaisip ng kung anong maaaring dahilan na nakikita ko mismo.

"I don't feel any of that, you're my baby, my wife, my spouse, my loved and further love brilliant merit" he straightly said.

This should not be on his aim, this is infidelity. He think wry. I want to ask him repeatedly why he suddenly turn like this. Ako ang nahihirapan sa kaniya. He should do his responsibility as Jiara's boyfriend. He should be on her side now at hindi sa akin.

"Kailer, think. Jiara loves you, you should value and give her time. She is worthy and I know she will be on you too. Kailer stop-" nangangalit na napalingon ito sa akin. Made my words cut.

"How can I stop if I already been decided?!" decided? Decided by his own or for his own sake. He is leaving those hard times and tough to Jiara which is I am still not clear but seeing she always performing as how the couple working.

"You should stop" Kailer.

"You're mine, I marked you and keep marking you. I won't stop remember that Kadyne" that's my name after the common first one.

If you won't stop, this feelings I am keeping for now will be increase further falling into the trapped. The trapped that you made, you made me experienced this!