Off Limits

"I now pronounce you, husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride." A round of applause echoed at this four corner of this church as we witnessed their first public kiss. Happiness plastered on their faces as their eyes sparkled like a star glistening in the darkness. I was busy observing the crowd when my sight darted to a group of girls who were directly staring at us, smiling while biting their lower lip. What the f**k? I had a quick glimpse and looked away. I took a glance with the three assholes to see their reaction but to my suprise, they're busy and paying attention to Zyrex and Tina's public kiss. Hayop na lintek. Is this their first time seeing a newly wed-couple having their kiss? I smirked while staring at them, enjoying the unfamiliar smile embedded on their faces. . . It's a cringe to the point that I felt a sudden goosebumps. They look stupid. I tried to focus as well but I really feel distracted knowing that I can clearly see an effigy in my peripheral vision and realized that someone with those trying-to-be-seductive eyes winking and it annoys me. Big time. Someone's in need of attention, yeah? I feel bored so I accepted the stare fight, welcoming her and her shits with a pair of cold eyes isn't that hard afterall. I smirked when she suddenly looked away. Yeah I love staring. . . but that only applies with one person and I am handsome sure it ain't you. I nailed my glimpse to where the crowd are busy with. At the back of my mind, I saw a girl in a white wedding dress. She was wearing her infamous smile which made her ethereal beauty more exposed as she was slowly walking in the aisle, 'till her eyes met mine. I looked at her, full of admiration. I smiled unconsciously. What a beautiful masterpiece. I'm on a deep depth of thoughts when I heard random voices, shouting then I realized it was the three. What the f**k is going on? "Tangina naman pre, may honeymoon pa. Gutom na ako animal!" "Gago tol! Dito na raw sila maghohoneymoon. Live show ata ang nais putangina!" "Depungal na Zyrex. Hoy! Respeto naman sa kagwapuhan ko lods! Nag-uumapaw sa kagwapuhan pero wala pang jowa." They're catching everyone's attention and it seems like they don't f*****g care at all. Assholes. I guess I'm the only halo among the horns. I settled my attention to Zyrex and her wife like the others did, and if I am not mistaken they're having their kiss for about five minutes now for Adrian's f*****g p**n's sake. People are trying to hold their laugh and some are already bursting out in laughter. "Pambihira. Kung ganyan ba naman kaganda 'yong bride e. Hoy Luke! Bakit tahimik ka d'yan?" Kiel, as he diverted his gaze at me. "Oh problema mo 'tol?" I replied. "Sus. Gutom lang 'yan tol. Animalism naman kasi 'tong mga hangal na 'to. Mga slapsoil sa kiss putangina. Hoy Aldrich!" - Adrian "Oh ano gago? Manahimik kang depungal ka hindi lang ikaw ang gutom pre okay?!" Do they really need to shout? Everyone's attention are on us and it's kinda irritating. "Why do you need to shout? Assholes." I uttered. A moment of silence dropped by before they could hold themselves back together. "Wow! English," they said in chorus while staring at me, unbelievably. Mga lintek. "Oh putangina bakit mo kami ini-english ha? May problema ka ba 'tol?" Aldrich seriously asked. "Wala. Kuya," I replied teasingly. "Eh di putangina sa Kuya. Huta ka." I wanted to burst out a laugh. Making them pissed makes my day completed. "Baka gutom lang 'yan, 'di ba Luke?" Adrian interrupted. Seeing his grin gives me more irritation. "Kausap ba kita?" I replied. "Hahahaha oh kalma lang, ang init na naman ng ulo mo sa 'kin animal, concern lang naman ako ah." The emcee announced the pictorial's proper order so we prepared ourselves. We're on the last part so I stayed on my seat, watching people who passed by and took a quick glimpse on my wrist watch. Time check. It's almost eleven o'clock and the pictorial is just about to start in a while. Great. "Oh tara na para mabilis." Aldrich headed his way to the altar. Adrian and Kiel who are on my left side and currently laughing on something I don't know and suddenly stood up. Adrian passed by but before Kiel would follow, he stopped right in front of me. I looked at him, wondering. "Oh diyan ka nalang?" he asked. "Ha?" "Hakdog. Trip mo ba magsolo flight sa pictorial mamaya? Pakiayos ng signal mo Brother. Lag ka." He continued his way to the altar. What the hell? Lag? I stood up and followed them. As I walked quietly with my hands on my pocket, I can hear murmurs. Cameras are everywhere. We're not in a mall show or any but people somehow, took this opportunity to get along with us, took some photos of us, some of the fans took a photos with the three except me. Well it's an event so I guess it's fine. Just don't go closer to me. "Okay. One, two, three, smile." "Kahit naman 'di ako ngumiti gwapo parin. Kita naman sa mga chix na nahuhumaling sa akin. Karismang Uno eh." "Oo p're mas gwapo nga lang ako kaysa sa'yo. Basta Kiel kakambal ng salitang gwapo kaya mas madaming nahuhumaling na chix eh." "Hoy mga animal mahiya naman kayo sa pang-i-scam. Araw araw kayong nagsisinungaling eh minus 10 kayo sa heaven niyan. Gwapo kayo? Si Adrian ba kayo? Sa 'kin talaga nahihimatay ang mga chix eh." Part of my routine while I am with them is to deal with their conceitedness. I wonder what's all about their behaviour today. Hm. Did they forget where we are? Their behaviour right now is supposed to be seen only when the four of us are present, and not on a public event like this. "Buti pa ang Luke, humble na nga loyal pa." They immediately faced me after I uttered those. I gave them my What's-your-f*****g-problem-mga-hayop-na-lintek look. They bursted out a laugh. "Maghanap ka muna ng girlfriend p're. Para may hustisya 'yang pagiging humble at loyal mo hm?" Kiel said tapping my right shoulder. "Mga BI talaga kayo gago. Luke. . ." He patted my left shoulder before he would continue what he's trying to say. "Kung wala ka talagang matipuhan manood ka ng p**n para may idea ka sa babaeng. . ." "Gago! Kami pa pala ang BI. Hahaha. Ginawa mo namang inosente 'yan depungal ka." "Para may idea siya sa babaeng matitipuhan niya. Madaming magaganda do'n, iba't ibang flavors pa. Alam mo namang pihikan eh kailangan niya ng madaming choices." Hm. Do I really look a good boy to them? "Hindi naman sa lahat ng oras kailangan alam ng lahat na may babae ka." For the second time, they diverted their gaze towards me. Their eyes were widely opened. Adrian and Aldrich's jaw dropped while Kiel is covering his mouth like I have said something unbelievable. "What? Eyes on cam dudes, not on my handsome face." I grinned. "Putangina english na naman! Ano ba talagang problema mo 'tol?" Aldrich exclaimed. Mga lintek talaga. "Ano nababakla na ba kayo? Tititigan niyo nalang ba ako hanggang marealized ninyong ako talaga tunay na pinakag'wapo sa 'tin?" I smirked. "Mga animal. Sino sainyong dalawa ang humawa d'yan?" Adrian who first got his senses back. "Sino lang ba ang gwapo sa 'tin? Lag ka rin ba? Malamang ako," Kiel who held his chin while smirking. Aldrich on the other hand who is the most talkative and noisy went silent. "Puta. Naano ka p're?" Adrian asked but Aldrich remained quiet, I wonder what he is thinking right now. This is something unusual. "Hm. So this girl you're talking about is the one I saw from your flat." It's not a question but somehow, a statement. My grin slowly disappeared after hearing what he have said then I realized what he's trying to say. "Oh? May babae 'tong si Luke? Hahaha. Matinik ka p're nag-uuwi ka na pala." Kiel looked so amused. "Hanep tol. Naglilihim ka na ba sa'min? Hindi namin 'yan aagawin pakilala mo nga animal," Adrian who just winked at a lady who passed by. "Puta ang sexy at ang ganda mga 'tol. 'Di ba Harvey?" He teasingly took a glance at me. I gave Aldrich a meaningful look. He grinned. "Pero mukhang namalikmata lang ata ako. Well gwapo lang, nanlalabo rin ang paningin. Dalian na nga natin para makapunta na tayo sa reception," he continued while laughing. "Oh thank God naisipan mo pa 'yan." We turned back our focus after hearing what the photographer have said. I found myself smirking while staring at this lady in front of us whom I thought of having a mild hypertension at this moment. She's biting her lower lip like she's letting her patience getting longer as her forehead creased out of annoyance. After a several shots, we decided to proceed at the venue of the reception. "Bigyan nga kita ng babae 'tol? Kasing ganda at sexy no'ng mga nasa p**n. Hahaha." When will he ever stop? "No thanks. I have my own standards and definitely not the same as yours." "Grabe naman 'to. Sinasabi mo bang cheap 'yong mga taste ko? May ipapakilala ako sa'yo--" "I am Off limits," I cutted his words. A smile slowly crept on my lips as her innocent, angelic face and mesmerizing eyes invaded my mind. --- Hola! Lame ba? Ahaha. Welcome to Off Limits. Sorry na agad sa mga grammatical errors. Sorry din kung mapapansin niyong madaldal minsan 'yong mga characters pero aayusin ko. Eh sa madaldal din kasi 'yong nagsusulat. Ahahaha. Actually weakness ko ang paggawa ng Male POVs so feeling ko nagppractice ako neto. Ang tagal ko na kasing gustong isulat 'to. Tuwang tuwa ako sa apat na itlog. Pero ayon nga. I will try my very best para maganda ang kalalabasan. HINDI SILA BAKLA madaldal lang si otor. Nyenye. Enjoy and happy reading! P.S hindi ito pure english mga brad maawa kayo sa brain cells ko. ~ tintirintintoots ?