Deucalion

Chapter 17

Mirror, mirror on the wall

Was I always meant to fall?

Roses white and dying light

Silver's sweet forgiving bite

She'll ask 'why'

No answers found

And I'll rot deep

Beneath the ground.

- v.d.

Chapter Seventeen

The things we left behind

Hindi agad ako nakatulog ng gabing iyon, para bang naiwan ko ang katinuan sa kubong tinutuluyan nya. Hindi pa rin makapaniwalang nakita ko ulit sya, nandito, malapit lang sya sa'kin. I don't know what he's really doing here, hindi ko matanggap na kaya nyang gawin ang mga iyon dahil lang gusto nya akong makasama. Three years kaya bakit ngayon pa?

Kahit puyat, maaga pa rin akong nagising. Hindi ako pumunta ng farm, nanatili lang ako sa bahay at naghahanda para sa pupuntahan namin ni Tyrrell mamayang gabi. Ni hindi ko sinubukang lumabas kahit sa totoo lang ay gusto ko syang makita.

I can tell, I matured. I'm not the young, dumb and broken girl back then who can't control her feelings when it comes to Lyon.

Pagsapit ng alas-singko ay nag-simula na akong nag-ayos. Paglabas ko ng bathroom, agad kong nakita si Gail na nakaupo sa kama ko at para talagang hinihintay ako.

"You and kuya Tyrrell will have a date?" She asked as she looked at me from my french twist hair down to my heels.

Ngumuso ako at humarap sa vanity mirror for a quick retouch.

"It's not what you think it is, Gail. Hindi lang kaming dalawa, marami kami."

Mula sa salamin, nakita ko ang pag-nguso nya. "I like him for you, ate. Even though my crush is more handsome and hotter than him."

Gulat ko syang nilingon, the way she said those words is like she's a mature woman already. Bumuntong hininga ako saka sya nilapitan at nag-squat sa kanyang harapan.

"You want to stay here or sleep until I come back?" I asked her as I touched her cheeks.

She nodded. "I'll wait for you and tell me what happened to the party."

Umikot ang mata ko at natawa na lang. Humiga sya at kinumutan ko, isang halik sa pisngi ang iginawad ko sa kanya bago lumabas ng silid. Sa labas ay naghihintay sa'kin si Tyrrell na nakatayo sa tabi ng kanyang kotse.

"Hey!" Pinasadahan nya muna ako ng tingin bago lumapit at niyakap saka ako hinalikan sa pisngi.

Ngumiti ako pero agad din iyong naglaho ng mapatingin sa gilid kung saan namamahinga ang ilang manggagawa. Lyon with his faded jeans, black shirt and grim expression is watching me from a far, darkly and dangerously. Sa sobrang bilis ng t***k ng puso at pagkalat ng takot ay agad akong napalayo kay Tyrrell na ikinakunot ng noo nya pero hindi naman nagkomento. He opened the door of the passenger's seat, I forced a smiled. One look at Lyon and I get in.

An intimate dinner happened in a restaurant downtown, ipinasara ng gabing iyon para sa'min. The dictator Dalfon Mansalbon with his vampire bodyguards, advisers and some notable guest ang nandon. Dictator Mansalbon was Tyrrell's godfather.

I'm not surprise when I saw Santi there but I acted like I don't know him. For sure, sunod-sunod na silang magpapakita sa'kin. My phone beeped and an unknown number appeared on the screen, binasa ko ang mensahe.

You're still not home... It's late.

I smirked, I know Lyon owned that number. I type a reply.

Who's this?

Hindi ko napigilang hindi matawa ng ma-i-send ko iyon. I'm thinkng about his reaction, I know it's epic for sure. Pero parang gusto ko atang bawiin iyon ng hindi na sya mag-reply. Ngali-ngaling i-text ko sya at sabihing sunduin na ako dito.

"You have a bad taste of men, Jane."

Nabitin sa ere ang pag-inom ko ng wine ng makita si Santi. Itinago ang phone saka sya tinaasan ng kilay.

He smirked. "Dating o kayo na?"

"Why do you even care?" I continued sipping my wine.

He shrugged his shoulder. "Labag ito sa loob ko and I'm not being bias or anything pero si Lyon lang ata ang matinong lalaking dinate mo."

Napaubo ako at muntikan pang maibuga ang wine sa bibig. Pinamulahan ng mukha.

"And I don't trust that Tyrrell."

I roll my eyes and smiled. "Look, Santi, and you should listen to me carefully, hmm? I don't care about your opinions because I'd rather choose Tyrrell than anyone of you."

Inirapan ko sya saka mabilis na tinalikuran pero natigilan ng makita sila Elric, Kael, Aiken at Lorcan doon. May hawak na wine glass habang nakatitig sa'kin. Mabilis akong nag-iwas ng tingin at hinanap si Tyrrell. Pero sa totoo lang, parang kinukurot ang puso ko.

"You know those guys?" Tyrrell asked when we got home.

Dumaan muna kami sa isang coffee shop bago umuwi kaya naumagahan kami kahit agad din kaming umalis sa restaurant kanina at bantay namin ang mga bodyguard ni dictator Mansalbon to make us safe. Inaalala ko nga si Gail pero nang tawagan ko ito kanina ay parang ayaw pa akong pauwiin.

"No, it's okay, ate. I'm sleeping in your room but don't think about me anymore. Think about Kuya Tyrrell and enjoy." Iyon ang mga sinabi nya bago ako babaan.

Bumuntong hininga ako. "One of them is Philippians councilor, the other one is my academician and others are just my schoolmates."

"I knew Santi Blacdemorth, he runs the constables and he's been friends with ninong."

Napatango lang ako sa sinabi nya, bumaba sya at binuksan ang pinto sa tabi ko. Lumabas na rin ako.

"Thank you for being with me tonight, Jane."

Kumabog ang dibdib ko ng hawakan nya ang baba ko, hindi alam ang gagawin. Ngumiti ako pero dahil sa kaba ay naging ngiwi iyon, ang nagawa lang ay humakbang patalikod kaya nakawala ako sa kanya.

"Well I think, I really need to unwind." Bahagya pa akong tumawa para maalis ang kaba, natigilan ng mahagip ng mata ko ang paggalaw ng mga halaman sa di kalayuan kahit hindi naman humahangin.

Bumuntong hininga sya. "Tuwang-tuwa si ninong sa flavoured blood. He highly recommended it to his people and other countries."

I smiled. "Give my regards to him then."

Napakurap-kurap ako ng gumalaw ulit ang mga halaman at mayamaya'y may naaninag na bulto ng isang lalaki, agad na kumalat ang kilabot sa katawan ko ng makita ang nagliliwanag nitong pulang mata sa kadiliman.

"Hindi ka pa papasok?" Tanong nya.

Umiling ako. "Mamaya na, magpapahangin muna ako."

"Goodnight, Jane."

Gusto kong humakbang ng lumapit sya sa'kin pero ayaw ko namang saktan ang kanyang damdamin. Ngayon, ang pisngi ko naman ang hinawakan nya saka tumitig sa mata ko at bumaba ang tingin sa labi ko. I know what will happen next and I'm scared to his possible moves. He lowered down his head, but before he can even capture my mouth. I tilted my head, making his lips landed on my cheeks.

Gumalaw ang kanyang panga, mabilis naman akong humakbang palayo sa kanya. Saglit syang natulala, nang tumingin sa'kin ay magkasalubong na ang mga kilay. Parang may gusto pa sanang sabihin pero inunahan ko na sya.

"Go-Goodnight, Ty." I tapped his shoulder, he heaved a sigh and nodded weakly before he walked in.

Nang sumarado ang pinto ay napabuga ako at napasentido. Nang maalala ang nakita kanina ay mabilis kong ibinalik ang tingin sa kadiliman pero wala na don ang bulto ng lalaki. I looked around and froze when I felt a presence at my back. My heart thudded, I don't know why I feel so guilty. Pero ng lumingon ako ay wala naman akong nakita.

I clenched my fist and when I glanced at the lanai, Lyon is sitting on one of the metal chairs there. His eyes is still red while looking at me furiously, he's trying to hide his emotions but he didn't succeed. Pinagkakanulo sya ng pula nyang mata.

"Nasa restaurant sila Santi, bakit wala ka doon?" Tanong ko saka umupo rin sa metal chair na kaharap nya.

I hope he didn't saw that kiss, malaki rin ang pangangatawan ni Tyrrell kaya siguradong natakpan ako but looking at him right now. I'm sure as hell that he saw that. He looked away while gritting his teeth and clenching his jaw. Naka-dikwatro at nakapamulsa sa suot na jeans habang nakasandal sa inuupuan.

"Maaga kayong umalis? Where did he take you?"

Kumunot ang noo ko. Is he spying on me? Or one of the descendants reported it to him? Santi maybe. Pagod akong sumandal sa kinauupuan.

"Why would you even care?"

Wrong, Janina!

Parang gusto kong tumakbo ng lumingon sya sa'kin at tumitig sa'kin ang nakakatakot ang malupit nyang mga mata. His jaw moves every time he gritted his teeth, pressed his lips together and breath hard.

"Do you want me to answer that?" He asked coldly.

I played with my fingers and gave him a mocking smile. "Lyon, bakit ko naman sasagutin ang tanong mo? Wala ka ng pakealam doon kung saan ako dalhin ni Tyrrell."

Mas lalong tumalim ang kanyang mata, gumalaw-galaw ang panga. Ngayon ko lang syang nakitang ganito at ako pa ang may gawa. With his soulless brooding eyes and dark face, I shut my mouth and looked away.

"What is he to you then? Hmm?"

Napabalik ang tingin ko sa kanya sa gulat sa sobrang lamig ng kanyang boses at ngayon ay wala na akong maaninag na emosyon sa kanyang mukha. Just like the first time we first met. I still remember that night. The lifeless, mysterious, cold guy who entered the bar four years ago. The guy who I asked to kissed me but he didn't say anything and just ignored me then turned away like he didn't saw me at all.

"Suitor. Fling or maybe..." Nagkibit-balikat ako saka puno ng panunuya syang nginisian.

"Lover."

Umigting lalo ang kanyang panga. "Ganyan din ba ang turing mo sa'kin noon, Jane?"

Napakurap-kurap ako, hindi inaasahan ang kanyang tanong kaya mas minabuti na lang na hindi na makapagsalita pa.

His jaw clenched again, I gulped when he stand and walked to my direction. Napako ako doon, hindi makagalaw. He placed his other hand on the table and the other is on the back of my chair then he lowered down his head, and all I can do was to watch him cornering me.

"This is where he kissed you, right, hmm?" I flinch and I almost shut my eyes when he touched my cheeks and wipe it like Tyrrell's kiss was a dirt.

Palipat-lipat sa mata nya ang tingin ko, nabibingi at nasasaktan na sa sobrang lakas at bilis ng t***k ng puso. Naliliyo sa titig nya, sa mabango nyang hininga at sa pinaghalong aftershave, pabango at sabong gamit nya.

"Did he make your heart beat faster than I could, baby?"

Napakapit ako sa mesa ng mas ibaba at ilapit nya pa sa'kin ang mukha, pigil ang hininga. Pinanlalamigan.

"L-Lyon," namamaos kong sabi, ni hindi alam kung ano ang sasabihin. Ni hindi kayang alisin ang titig sa pula nyang mata.

"What am I really to you back then, Jane?

Nag-init ang mata ko ng maaninag ang sakit at paghihirap sa kanyang mata at boses.

Truth is, I don't really know what he was to me back then. I'm young, broken, impulsive and confused with my new heart. I can still remember everything I did to him, how I acted in front of him. How I control and manipulated him, kung paano ko sya napanatili sa tabi ko. Paano ako nagselos at nagalit dahil lang sa mga simple at mababaw ng mga bagay. But I know myself, the monster me and the darkness. Bata pa at maagang naulila, punong-puno ng galit at sakit. Rebellious, wasted, stupid and seeking for attention, that was me back then.

Ipinagdikit nya ang mga noo namin saka pumikit, natulala na lang ako.

"You shouldn't trust him---"

"You have no power over me, Lyon." Bulong ko, sinubukang magtaray pero hindi ko magawa. I even sounds like I'm challenging him. Taunting him. Seducing him.

He opened his eyes and the corner of his mouth lifted, his eyes were sporting defiance and certainty while staring at me.

"You sure about that, baby?"

I gritted my teeth and all I can do is to looked away especially when I felt my eyes start to get wet. Sino lang ba ang niloloko ko, matagal ko ng alam, he can control me. Iyong puso ko nga, nasa akin nga pero sa kanya naman tumitibok.

"Why are you really here, Lyon?"

Bumagsak ang tingin ko sa kamay ko, I'm wearing a caftan dress with a slit until my legs so my thighs are totally exposed. Namula ang pisngi ko at inayos iyon para matakpan ang hita pero dahil sa panginginig ng kamay at mas nalantad pa ang hita ko. He squatted down in front of me and helped me fix my dress with grim expression as he stared at my dress darkly, umirap na lang ako.

"I'm here hoping to win back my baby." He said softly.

His right hand is still on the table while his left is at my chair, beside my legs holding my dress so that my thighs are properly covered. My heart throbbed painfully, I stared at his eyes kahit natatakot na baka mabasa nya ang tunay kong nararamdam pero hindi ko talaga kaya, sumusukong umiwas ako ng tingin saka tumayo at naglakad palayo sa kanya. Kinakalma ang sarili.

"You are now my past, Lyon, and I intend... To keep it that way."

"Then face me," hamon nya. "Say that to my face and I will leave you alone."

Nanghina ako don dahil mas hindi ko na ata kaya ang huli nyang sinabi.

Bumuntong hininga sya at naramdaman ko ang paglapit nya sa'kin kasunod ng paghawak nya sa balikat ko. I glance at him over my shoulder, napapikit ng isandal nya ang noo sa batok ko at mabigat ang kanyang bawat paghinga, tila ba pinanghihinaan na rin.

"I'm maybe your past, Jane, but whether you like it or not, I'm also your present and I will make sure that I will be your future."