Twisted Affection

TWENTY-THREE

"Good morning, everyone," he greeted and his voice smooth and confident. "I'm Dr. Zairon Aero Galvin, and I will be your instructor for this semester. I'm looking forward to working with all of you."

Nagpalakpakan ang lahat, pero hindi ako makagalaw sa aking upuan. Hindi ako makapaniwala na si Zairon ang magiging instructor namin. This was the last thing I expected. He really became an instructor without using Zaiden's name. Ang nakakatawa lang ay nasa ibang school kami at ako pa rin ang estudyante niya.

Naagaw rin ng atensiyon ng dalawa ang lalaki sa harap namin. Napanganga pa sila at ang ibang mga babae.

“s**t, seryoso?!” Wala sa sariling tili ni Jazz. Napatingin ang lahat sa kaniya. Kami na ang nahiya dahil sa lakas ng boses niya na pati si dean ay napahawak nalang sa dibdib dahil sa gulat.

“Ms. Cruzal! Your voice!” Suway ni dean. Nagtawanan ang lahat dahil sa inasta ni Jazz. Nahiya naman ito agad at tumayo upang yumuko.

“I’m sorry ma'am, sir. Hindi ko lang talaga ma carry na ganito ka gwapo ang– este, ano,” napakamot nalang siya sa ulo at ngumiti. “Gaano kagaling! Ayon, hehe.” Napailing nalang si Darcy sa trip ni Jazz.

Nagkatinginan kami ni Zairon, and for a moment, it felt like we were the only two people in the room. His eyes widened in surprise when he saw me, but he quickly composed himself.

"Let's get started, shall we?" he said, breaking the silence. The room erupted into applause once again, but I couldn't bring myself to join them.

Hindi ko magawang tingnan siya habang nagtuturo dahil kumakabog ng mabilis ang puso ko. Napapatanga nalang ako dahil sa nangyayari.

I found myself unable to focus. His presence was a shock to my system, bringing back a flood of memories I had tried so hard to forget. I could feel his gaze on me several times throughout the lecture, but I kept my eyes firmly on my notes, trying to act as if nothing was wrong.

He moved around the room, gesturing with his hands as he spoke. His eyes occasionally scanned the room, making sure everyone was following along. When his gaze landed on me, however, he paused.

"You, wearing eyeglasses, can you tell us the main function of the circulatory system?" he asked while his gaze never leaving mine. Wearing eyeglasses huh? If he calls my name, he will definitely take everything’s attention.

Tumayo ako ng kalmado kahit na nagwawala na ang buong organs ko sa loob ng katawan ko."Yes, Dr. Gavilan," I began a meeting with his gaze. "The main function of the circulatory system is to transport nutrients, gases, and waste products around the body, to regulate body temperature, and to maintain homeostasis."

He nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. "Very good. That's correct."

The auditorium was quiet and everyone's attention was on us. I could feel my cheeks heating up under their gazes, but I kept my focus on the board.

"Can you also tell us the three main components of this system?" Dagdag niya pang tanong.

I took a deep breath and reminding myself that I knew this. "The three main components of the circulatory system are the heart, the blood, and the blood vessels," I answered confidently.

He smirked but eventually managed to put a small smile on his lips. Umiwas nalang ako ng tingin dahil iba ang naalala ko sa ngising iyon.

"Excellent. You seem to have a good grasp of the material. Sit down.”

I felt a sense of relief washing over me. I had managed to answer his questions correctly, despite the pressure.

Habang nagpapatuloy siya sa kanyang lecture, hindi ko napigilang tumingin-tiningin sa kanya. Mukha siyang lubos na iba sa Zairon na kilala ko tatlong taon na ang nakalilipas. Mas mukha siyang mas mature at mas… lalo lamang siyang gumwapo. Hindi ko na narinig galing kay Zaiden ang mga nangyayari kay Zairon. Mukhang iniiwasan na niyang banggitin ang pangalan niya kapag magka usap kami.

I bet, he’s still not married. I still remember what Zaiden told me three years ago that he never fall in love before and I tried to move on dahil alam kong panandalian lang ang nararamdaman ko sa kaniya.

I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts. I had to focus on the present, on my studies. I couldn't afford to be distracted by the past. Not now, not when I had so much at stake.

But as I looked at Zairon, I couldn't help but wonder... Could I really keep the past buried? Or was it destined to catch up with me, no matter how hard I tried to run from it?

After our class, nagmamadali agad akong lumabas dahil kahit ako ang pinakahuli sa amin lumabas parati ay ngayon ako naman ang nangunguna. Hinabol ako ng dalawa dahil nagmamadali akong lumabas ng room.

“Girl! What's the rush? First time to ‘ah! Hindi ka ba naka move on nang pinasagot ka ni Doc. Gray eyes?” Sambit ni Jazz at pinapantayan ang lakad.

“Napansin mo rin? Ang gwapo! May asawa na kaya ‘yon? Feel mo, maagaw kaya natin?”

"Stop it, you two!" sabi ko, hindi mapigilang ngumiti sa kanilang kakulitan. "Hindi naman tayo nandito para maghanap ng asawa, diba? Nandito tayo para mag-aral."

Tumawa sila, pero hindi nila tinigilan ang kanilang biruan. "Oo naman, girl. Pero hindi naman masama kung may bonus, diba?" sabi ni Darcy, at nagtawanan ulit sila.

Napailing nalang ako at nagpatuloy sa paglalakad. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko haharapin ang mga susunod na araw kasama si Zairon, pero alam kong kailangan kong maging matatag. I have to act like nothing happens.

"Oy, teka! Saan ka ba pupunta? Hindi mo ba kami sasamahan mag-lunch?" tanong ni Jazz, habang hinahabol ako.

"Naku, pasensya na girls. May gagawin lang ako. Sa susunod na lang tayo mag-lunch," sagot ko, at nagpaalam na ako sa kanila.

Habang naglalakad ako papuntang comfort room, hindi ko maiwasang mag-isip. Ano kaya ang mga plano ni Zairon? Bakit siya nagpunta dito sa Pampanga? At higit sa lahat, coincidence lang ba ang nangyari ngayon o sadya na naman?

Napakaraming tanong ang gumugulo sa isipan ko, pero wala akong kasiguraduhan kung may sagot ako sa lahat. Ang tanging alam ko lang ay kailangan kong maging handa sa anumang mangyari.

Lumiko upang makapasok sa comfort room ngunit agad napaatras nang napansin kong may makakasalubong ako. Umiwas ako habang nakayuko ngunit pumantay siya sa harapan ko. I lifted my head only to see Zairon’s eyes staring at me.

Napanganga ako. “Z-zairon.. I mean, Dr. Gavilan,” Agad kong pagtatama sa sinabi ko nang makitang wala man lang siyang reaksiyon.

“Nice seeing you well.” Hindi ko maiwasang magulat nang ngumiti siya sa akin. His soft gaze shocked my entire system. Three years without seeing him is like I'm meeting a different person.

Tumango ako, trying to maintain composure. "Yes. I'm doing well, thank you." I couldn't help but feel a bit awkward. I should act normal. Bakit ba affected pa rin ako? Three years na, kailangan ko ng mag move on.

He chuckled softly, "No need for formalities. Zairon will do." His tone was casual, but his gaze was intense. "It's been a while, Laurene. How have you been?"

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko sa kanyang pagtawag sa akin sa pangalan. "I've been managing," sagot ko, trying to sound unaffected. "And you, Dr. Gavilan? What brings you to Pampanga?"

His smile faded slightly, replaced by a more serious expression. "I'm here for work. I've taken on a temporary assignment in the medical field. It's a good opportunity to contribute and gain experience."

Napansin ko ang kanyang mga mata na tila may malalim na iniisip. "I see," sagot ko, keeping my response vague. "Well, I wish you success in your endeavors here."

His gaze lingered for a moment before he nodded. "Thank you. If you ever need assistance or guidance, don't hesitate to reach out." Sagot niya. “I'll go now, nice meeting you again, Laurene.”

Ngunit bago pa siya lumampas sa’kin, nakita ko pa kung paano tumaas ang sulok ng labi niya. Zairon, what are you trying to do again?

The day ended and I bid farewell to Jazz and Dalcy. Napansin ko pa ang likod ni Zairon na papunta sa kotse niya. Many students look at him with admiration especially that he’s captivating. Mabilis siyang napansin agad dahil sa tindig niya. If I were the same old Laurene, kanina pa ako tumakbo para iwasan siya. I admit, I'm still affected. Apektado ako dahil tinago ko ang mga anak ko sa kaniya. Hindi dahil sa past namin dahil kahit mahirap sa’kin, kailangan kong kalimutan ang nangyayari dahil mas lalo lamang akong nasasaktan.

Kanina pa pala ako nakatitig sa kaniya kaya hindi ko napansin na may tumabi na pala sa’kin.

“Hi, Laurene. Uuwi ka na?” I looked at Alvey, he's with his friends. He's the same year with me but he's studying medtech. Nagkakilala kami dahil sabay kaming nag enroll rito sa University. Transferee rin siya katulad ko.

“Yes, wala na kayong last subject?”

“No, hindi pumasok last instructor namin,” he glanced at Zairon who’s talking with other students. Nagugulat pa rin ako dahil ngumingiti na siya. He's not like this, three years is really long. Maraming ng nagbago.

“I felt something about that doctor,” He said suddenly, napatingin ako sa kaniya.

“Bakit, gusto mo rin ba siya?” Natatawa kong tugon. Nag side eye siya sa’kin kaya napatawa ako ulit.

“Sa gwapo kong ‘to, magkakagusto sa kaniya?” Hindi makapaniwala niyang sambit. “Well, kung siya rin naman, okay lang rin sa’kin. Papable naman siya.” bawi niya at namewang pa.

Nanlalaki ang mata ko nang umiba ang boses niya. Humagalpak siya ng tawa dahil sa itsura ko. “Joke lang, tahong pa rin gusto ko. At saka, baka mas malaki pa nga ‘yong akin ‘eh.” natatawa niyang sambit. Napalunok ako nang may maalala ako. Ewan ko lang kung mapapantayan ba niya ang kay Zairon.

"Pero seriously, anything bothering you?" He added when I didn't answer.

I hesitated for a moment before deciding to share a bit. "Well, you know, sometimes the past just creeps up on you unexpectedly. Parang kahit anong gawin kong iwas, may mga bagay na hindi mo kayang takbuhan."

His expression turned more thoughtful, "I get that. Pero importante rin naman na harapin ang mga bagay para makapag-move forward. Otherwise, you'll keep looking back."

"Alam mo, medtech ka nga pero parang philosopher ka na rin," I teased.

He chuckled, "Well, part-time philosopher. Seriously though, if you ever need someone to talk to or just hang out, I'm here."

"Sus, mga linyahan 'ah." Natatawa kong sagot.

Tumaas ang isang kilay niya. "What? I'm just concerned, okay? Baka feels mo, gusto kita?" Straightforward talaga ang lalaking 'to.

Hinampas ko siya ng marahan. "Hindi 'no, I know you have a crush on Jazz. Huwag ako." Kindat ko pang sagot. Namula ang pisngi niya at napaiwas nalang. I know his weakness, torpe kasi.

Tumingin ulit ako kay Zairon na ngayon ay nakatitig na pala sa akin habang nakasandal siya sa kaniyang kotse. Umiwas agad ako ng tingin at nang makita ang paparadang tricycle ay agad ko itong nilapitan.

Bakit ba hindi pa rin ako comfortable sa mga titig niya? Para kasing may pinapahiwatig siya palagi.