RAYANA

Chapter 6

Sometimes it's hard to breathe rather than feeling empty.

We never have the guts to understand what we are and confused what we should be until it's too late for you to analyze yourself. Lost is somehow common but losing yourself is not ideal, it's your fault and it aren't just not about your surrounding that it's at fault but how you can carry yourself in a situation that you aren't control and for this, for me this is just an ordinary obstacle.

But... I felt that it's a big deal this time.

I look at the sky and the clouds keeping out the blue sky showed. It's a sunny day yet I feel gloomy and unsettled.

After we got down to the mountain, His men was ready to fetch us on the highway, we settled ourselves at the backseat and ready to go. The last time I saw was a dark smoke up at the mountain and a siren of the fire truck, and the blue sky around.

We are in a private hotel near south. I saw how beautiful the ocean was. It meets the sky like they meant to be near to each other yet when your in the middle of it, you realize that they are so far from each other.

"Let's change your name and find a suitable place for you.. We can't risk this time." It wakes me up and look at Reiga who's been busy with his laptop.

Kanina pa kami nag uusap tungkol sa nangyari. There's this questions that I always wanted to ask to him but I want it personal and I think it's time.

"I don't need to change my name Reiga.. I don't even want this hide and seek game." I coldly said making him stop and look at me.

He clinched his jaw while glaring at me. 

"This is not a game Raya.."

"It is for me!" I said walk to the single couch and seat, staring at him. Avoid showing emotions.

"You aren't telling me anything from the start Reiga and let me in the dark like a child.."

" You. Are. A. Child." Mariin nyang sabi.

"They don't teach me to be a child, they trained me to be a emotionless warrior, so don't treat me like I am naïve emotional kid because from the start I've proved to you that I wasn't and this has to stop because I'm tired of hiding. I'm gonna be go alone tomorrow and face him. My father and you can't stop me." I said full of conviction and finalization. His just looking at me.

I stand up and ready to go to my room when he talk.

"What about him?" I stop there. I know who his referring to and I didn't expect him to bring out Zac about this again.

"Zac." He quietly said watching my every move. I gulp secretly before look at him.

"What are you really doing this Reiga? Just let me be."

Umiling sya.

"His gonna ask you.."

"Who is he?" I asked cut him off.

He just stare and align his lips. I saw how he taken a back by my question. I face him, this time I aren't need for nonsense answer.

"Don't tell me again that his Zac because really Reiga I had enough of your bullshits. You don't treat someone as special as him because it barely show your emotions in the field of business." I look away from and look outside.

This is the reality of our world. I heard him groan and sigh. Placing his face to his palms.

It takes him awhile to say any words.

"Younger brother" He quietly said.

I glance at him and saw him looking at the ground. He sigh heavily.

"His still a child when.. when the Arege kidnapped him from us. I don't really want this position and I was selfishly glad that he was born because I know that our traditions will passed to him because his the younger. The heir to the clan. That's why I tried my best to go in your clan to save him. It takes me years to know where he is until you decided to risk your life and created this havoc Rayana." He got up and walk to the glass wall facing the ocean. I saw how tense he was. Clinching his jaw every time.

"But.. It's too late for me to back out this time and Zac isn't ready for holding an empire but you let your guard down to him Rayana. His a forbidden kid because.."

"Yet you let him go to me like I'm responsible for him!" I shouted this time. This bastard how could he!?

He stormily face me with his pissed look.

"Your responsible for making him dependent on you! This isn't according to my plan Rayana! But damn! how can I stop him from looking at you every time I talk about hiding you away from this. He doesn't understand your situation rather our world fully! Every time I have plan yet you destroy it, you are an expert to destroy plans like its useless! "

"Then you should try harder! Let him understand everything! You can't keep him out of this Reiga!"

"You want this too Rayana! You even let him do things that you aren't familiar with but you like it! You don't even have any idea that you laugh around him like it's not new to you! I knew you for years, you didn't let your guard down even to me yet it easy for you to show yourself to him.. How can I stop you both for being a kid for once in your life and remind you that we're living in this bloody world?!"

We glare at each other and we didn't back out from we're we stand until I look away and sigh.

"It doesn't change the fact that I still go tomorrow." I end it and turn around to go to my room.

"You aren't listening! Rayana!" Sigaw nya and I know his men heard our shouts outside the door.

I shut him out by closing the door so loud like it's going to broke any minute.

I dropped myself to the side of the bed and hug myself. Staring at the blue wall, it reminds me of an eyes that always stare at me. I sigh and close my eyes.

Ahh. This seems not like me at all.

For awhile I stay like that until I crawl to the bed and rest my head to the pillow. I should sleep to avoid this empty feeling.

I was awake by the quiet voices outside of my room. I got up and hidden my presence to them. I let the door open and slide myself out, I take a steps and saw a not familiar man standing behind Reiga. The respect and stance of him makes me believe that his the right hand of Reiga.

It's getting dark outside and the sun was set to the horizon, illuminating the red orange ocean in the background.

I didn't hide myself but they didn't feel my presence.

".. they burned the mansion before the police arrived Sir. They didn't got any evidence and the case was closed. They dig a little bit but all just  conclusion.. The problem right now Sir is The young master."

Reiga look at him and drink the red wine on his hand.

"Where is he?" I rest my back to the wall and stare at the space.

"He refused to go home.." He didn't finished his words because Reiga glare at him.

"Then drag him out of there Hillio!" He shouted.

"I-It might get wrong sir.. Señor Drevon wasn't agree about physically harm him nor he didn't want to see young master to cry.."

"f**k the hell! Mas importante pa ba yon kisa mapahamak sya lalo. Drag him out, force him to go home Hillio! I don't care if Father will get mad because his precious son refuse to believe that Rayana is dead! Just Go!"

"B-But Sir.. His been crying up until now, we should let him see her.."

 Do you understand what you have said Hillio!?" He grab Hillio and push him so hard that the man fly up to the wall near me.

Magsasalita pa sana sya but he caught my eyes and stop. Hillio who's shocked when he look back and saw me suddenly got up, fixed his blazer before bowing at me.

"Miss." Bati nya at agad na gumilid para magkaharap kami ni Reiga who turned around and breathe deeply.

"Get out Hillio, Wait outside" He coldly said to him. Agad namang tumalima ang lalaki at umalis.

I look down and saw my toes curling on the dark brown carpet. My hair fall down on the side of my face hiding a bit my face.

"You don't really see the situation Rayana.." He quietly said, he drink the last drop of his red wine and walk to the stand were the red wine bottle located.

"You let this happened too.."

"That's why I need you to cooperate so I can fix this one." Sagot nya pouring his glass again.

"Why would you want me alive Reiga?" I felt his eyes on me but I still looking at my toes.

"You should dispose me along time ago.. Why bother to keep me this way?"

"Because you are like the sister that I wish I had.."

I stop and glance at him but I saw him looking down at his red wine. This is the first time that I saw how deeply he concentrated and think.

"I am the older but you guide me in the darkness when I couldn't take pressures between the clans anymore.. You saved me multiple times and the only thing that I can do for you is to make you still alive even if you don't want it anymore. So don't questions my plans of saving you to yourself because they always save us both in the end."

I look down and sigh.

"I don't know Reiga." I quietly said. All I want is to be gone somehow after I met him. That's what I had in my entire life before I met that blue eyes and I didn't realize that Reiga had this side for me.

Now, I'm confused and lost.

I couldn't choose.

"Do you read that envelope I gave you?"

Napakurap ako at tumingin sa kanya. I saw him watching me.

"I am.." So he did the plan without telling me.

"That's the new life that I can give you Rayana, it took me months to decide what I should do to make us both at peace. Showing them that you are dead by my hand was a good attacked."

That's the plan information that he passed to me through that envelope, and the solid alibi we've got but we didn't talk about it.

"But Zac saw the pictures of me pointing a gun at your head. It looks like they knew that you've been close to Zac this months. "

Awang ang labing humarap ako sa kanya at tumuwid ng upo. There's a spy inside the safe house. 

"His mad at you?" Kurap ko.

Ngumisi sya.

"He wants me dead.. That little man tsk." Ngisi nyang sabi at tinitigan ang alak. I saw cycle of darkness around his eyes and uncertainties.

I close my fist so tight until I feel the sting. I turn around and slowly breathe out. If I'll go to my Father, it's really a wrong turn for the Villacenor and they will end up dead with me. I saw Reiga struggle to breathe in the same way as we knew where our grave was. We end up in the possibility of choosing to die or choose to sacrifice for this ordinary obstacle.

I am ready to die, to face my death, to take my one last breathe.

But, I only choose to die alone and not with a clan or someone.

"Fine.." Paos kung sabi, turning around again to face the confused Reiga.

"Let's do your plan "