Between Hate and Love

Chapter 8

I wasn’t able to sleep well that night. Kung saan-saan nakarating ang pagreresearch ko tungkol sa babae. I went from one f*******: account to another, hanggang i********: at twitter hindi ko pinalampas. I also read dozens of articles about Khal and his company that had been going successfully for the past five years. It began with a proposal project, then many people funded it, and he had some big shareholders so it immediately became what it was now.

Well, Khal was good with people. He was extroverted and he had a way of making himself known. I guess that was what made him special. Perhaps, that made him got what he wanted now.

From what I found out, the girl was rich. Much more than that, he had a father who used to be a technology analyst from another oil company in the country. I guess that made sense. Khal was probably trying to win her, so he could win the father.

Although I had a few hours of sleep, I was able to get to the office ten minutes earlier. Hindi na ako kumuha ng pagkain sa cafeteria. Girl scout ako ngayong araw. I brought biscuits with me, in case Khal would decide not to make me eat lunch again.

Pagkarating ko sa office, hindi ko inaasahan na nandoon na pala siya.

I swear. Siya lang yata ang boss na kilala ko na maagang pumapasok sa opisina niya.

“Good morning, sir,” I greeted him, without looking. Hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala sa ginawa niya kahapon. Alam ko na empleyado lang ako, but what the hell? He wasn’t the Khal that I knew. And much, he was supposed to treat his employees niceley. An employee that is full, is an efficient employee!

Khal did not reply.

I made my way to the mini office and sat there, waiting for him to tell me what to do. Wala akong pending na gagawin dahil sabi niya, siya na ang tatapos ng presentation na ‘yon kahapon.

I watched Khal walk back-and-forth in front of his desk. He was reading a book. His forehead was creased from thinking deeply. He was wearing a suit and he looked so elegant in it. I tried to avert my gazes, but somehow, my eyes kept looking back at him.

Hindi ko alam ang tumatakbo sa isip niya. Hindi ko alam kung bakit niya ako tinanggap sa kumpanya. Naawa ba siya sa’kin? Alam ba niya ang mga pangangailangan ko? Did he ever try to contact me when I was abroad?

Ang layo ng agwat namin ngayon. Kung dati naiintindihan ko siya kahit paano, ngayon, hindi ko na alam ang kahulugan ng mga bagay na ginagawa niya. He was kind enough to accept me here as his assistant, but he was rubbing into my face that I no longer knew him and I wouldn’t be able to step into his world anymore.

I heaved a sigh.

Khal walked towards the my office, so I busied myself, trying to look as if I was doing something. Pero wala talaga. Kasi wala pa naman siyang sinasabi na gawin ko.

“We’ll have lunch with one of a major shareholder,” Khal informed me. “You’re coming along with me.”

I nodded at him, still, without looking. Ayoko siyang tingnan nang malapitan at ayokong malaman niya na tinitingnan ko siya. Ang gusto ko na malaman niya ay hindi tama ‘yung ginawa niya kahapon. Yes, he was my boss, but certainly I also became his friend before his ex-girlfriend. I didn’t want to tolerate him.

“Also, I made some changes in the presentation yesterday. Finish editing it today and then get me the report from the operational unit for this month.”

I nodded.

Khal told me a lot more things, but I just kept nodding. He probably knew I wasn’t listening, so he took my shoulders and made me look at him. “I need your attentiveness, Ms. Reyes,” he said.

“Yes, sir, I’m sorry. Is there anything else?” I asked.

Our eyes were locked and as much as I wanted to roll my eyes at him, I didn’t. He was my boss, I was just an employee. Gago, ang hirap niya unawain. Gusto ko siyang kausapin at ipaintindi sa kanya lahat ng nangyari before, but his heart was closed for me.

“I need my attentive assistant. I’m paying for one, so be that person,” he said in a stern voice.

“Your assistant will be very attentive sir, if you know their capacity as a human being. You know full well that a hungry individual would not be able to function well,” I replied, not backing down. Medyo nagsisisi ako sa sagot ko, pero bahala na.

“It was one time. Most people get hungry and they don’t make remarks like that. They do their jobs, they try to find food and make food.”

Hindi ko na alam kung saan patungo ang sagutan namin na ‘to.

“You’re unbelievable, sir. The Khal that I know would certainly care a lot for his employees.”

He leaned over the desk, trapping me with both of his hands. I instinctively move my head away from him.

“I told you, forget what you know about the old Khal, Ms. Reyes. There’s no Khal here that would give you a special treatment. You’re an employee here, you must act like one.”

Gusto ko pa sana i-argue na ganoon naman talaga ang ginagawa ko. I didn’t even made a move on him yet, nagpapagoodshot pa lang ako bilang empleyado niya. Tapos ganoon na agad ang sinasabi niya?

“Oh, and one more thing,” he added. “Both of us got hungry, not just you. Blame me if I let you starve on your own,” he said as if I should thank him for that.

Pero sabagay, naiintindihan ko kung bakit niya nasabi ‘yon.

His eyes that were staring into mine felt like an ocean that was scary for its depth and beautiful for its appearance. He was being like that again—staring into my eyes as if he was piercing into my soul.

His face became an inch away as I had the urge to lock my lips onto mine. But both of us got startled when the door opened and the girl from yesterday arrived, calling out Khal’s name. “Khal! My Khal! I am here!”