Sinful Attachment

KABANATA 13

“Where are we going?” Tanong ni Chase matapos siyang sunduin ni Kaizer sa kaniyang bahay.

Kaizer only gave a small smile habang nauuna siyang maglakad. “Makikita mo rin,” he answered shortly, parang sinasadya niyang maging mysterious.

The sun had already gone down, and the sky was now covered in deep shades of night nang biglang ayain ni Kaizer si Chase na lumabas. Medyo late na rin, kaya hindi maiwasang magtaka ni Chase, dahil hindi naman ito yung usual na oras na lumalabas sila or nagha-hang out.

She glanced at him, her brows slightly furrowed, trying to read his expression. May something sa way ng pagyaya niya na iba, parang may plano si Kaizer pero hindi niya lang sinasabi. Hindi siya mukhang casual lang, pero hindi rin obvious kung ano talaga ang pakay.

Paminsan-minsan, tinitignan ni Chase si Kaizer habang nag mamaneho, still trying to figure out kung ano bang iniisip ni Kaizer. Hindi naman siya uncomfortable, pero hindi rin siya totally relaxed. May konting tension, yung tipong galing sa hindi mo alam kung ano ang aasahan mo next.

“Hoy, I’m starting to feel nervous. Umayos ka Kaizer.” There was a hint of warning in Chase’s voice, and her nervousness was easy to notice.

“Kumalma ka lang, hindi kita ipapahamak.” Natatawang sambit ni Kaizer dahilan para mapairap si Chase.

It didn’t take long before they finally arrived at their destination. The moment Chase saw the place, she was caught off guard.

She slowed down a bit, her eyes scanning the area as recognition slowly settled in. This wasn’t just some random place. She had been here before.

The last time she was here was back in college, when Chaos brought her here just to help her feel better after she had been crying. The memory hit her unexpectedly, bringing back not just the place, but the emotions tied to it.

For a moment, she stayed quiet, standing there as if she was pulled back to that time. It wasn’t just nostalgia, may mas malalim na rason at dahilan ng pagsuyod ni Chase sa paligid, like she didn’t expect to come back here under a completely different situation.

Napahinto siya, her fingers curling slightly at her side habang unti-unting gumugulo yung thoughts niya.

Hindi naman ito ang first time na gagala o mag dedate sila ni Kaizer, pero everytime na dadalhin siya ni Kaizer sa kung saang lugar ay parang may mga alaalang bumabalik sakanya. May pakiramdam na parang kulang, may nawawala, pero hindi niya maipaliwanag.

“Bakit dito…?” Chase thought, her chest feels a little heavier than before. Hindi niya inaasahan na babalik siya sa lugar na ‘to, lalo na at iba ang kaniyang kasama.

This place has been her’s and Chaos safest place.

Her eyes moved slowly around the place again. “Dito ako umiyak noon… dito niya ako dinala…” The quiet night, the same atmosphere, even the stillness of the place, everything reminded her of that moment with Chaos.

Napabuntong hininga siya nang mahina.

“Ang tagal na nun… pero bakit parang ang lapit pa rin?” she wondered, naguguluhan sa sarili niyang reaction. Parang hindi siya ready maramdaman ulit lahat ng iyon. “Ang lala naman kasi, wala na nga si Chaos pero siya nanaman nasa isipan ko.”

She glanced at Kaizer for a second. “Alam niya ba ‘to? she questioned silently. Or coincidence lang?” Mabilis na umiling si Chase at pinipilit ang sariling isipin na coincidence lang ito.

Hindi niya alam kung anong mararamdaman niya. Part of her wanted to brush it off, to treat it like just another place, another memory. Pero may part din sa kanya na hindi mapigilan balikan yung naramdaman niya noon.

For a moment, she just stood there, caught in between. Past and present, Chaos and Kaizer, old feelings and current reality.

“Hindi na dapat ganito… she told herself quietly. Tapos na ‘yon… At mas lalong walang namagitan smain ni Chaos. We’re just friends.”

But even as she tried to convince herself, she could still feel it, that familiar weight in her chest, something she thought she had already moved on from, now slowly coming back the moment she stepped into that place again.

“You okay?” Tanong ni Kaizer nang mapansin na malalim ang iniisip ni Chase.

“Mhm, nagulat lang na you bring me here.” She shrugged lightly as she spoke, giving Kaizer a small smile.

It wasn’t a full smile, just enough to soften her expression, like she was trying to brush off whatever she was feeling inside. There was still a hint of hesitation in her eyes, but she chose not to dwell on it, keeping things light for the moment.

“Ang ganda dito. Thank you.” Sambit ni Chase habang nakatingin kay Kaizer na busy ngayon mag latag ng picnic blanket sa buhangin.

“Picnic date?” Tumatawang sambit ni Chase.

“Not really, nood tayo sunset.” Kaizer said with a small smile, gently patting the blanket beside him as a silent signal for Chase to sit next to him.

His gesture was calm and inviting, like he was giving her space but also gently encouraging her to stay close. The way Kaizer looked at her wasn’t forceful, just patient, as if he was waiting for Chase to decide on her own.

Napansin iyon ni Chase at sandaling napahinto. She glanced at the spot he tapped, then back at him, trying to read his intention. Hindi naman siya uncomfortable, pero may konting hesitation pa rin sa kanya lalo na ngayon na naguguluhan nanaman siya sa kaniyang nararamdaman.

“Hilig mo talaga mang gulo Chaos, bagay sa pangalan mo… Literal na Chaos.”

“Upo ka na.” Natatawang sambit ni Kaizer.

The blanket shifted slightly as she settled in. The quiet between them felt different from earlier. Mas calm, mas personal, pero may kaunting uncertainty pa rin sa side ni Chase, like she was still trying to figure out what this moment meant or why it felt familiar in a way she could not fully explain.

“You know what? Thank you Kaizer for bringing me here.” Sambit ni Chase habang nakatitig ang kaniyang mga mata sa papalubog na araw.

This feels surreal, after how many years ay ngayon nalang siya talaga ulit nakabalik sa beach para manood ng sunset.

“How come alam mong mahilig ako sa sunset? Hindi ko pa naman nasasabi sayo yan ah?” Pabirong sambit ni Chase kay Kaizer.

“I have my ways,” Kaizer said with a small teasing smile.

He sounded casual, like he was just joking, while Chase wasn’t looking. In that brief moment, he quietly lifted his phone and took a picture of her without making it obvious. It was quick and natural, parang instinct na lang, like he didn’t even think twice about it.

After that, he opened his i********: and posted it, casually introducing Chase as his date for the day.

Chase was still unaware, just sitting beside him and looking around quietly, her attention focused on the view and the calm night around them. Meanwhile, Kaizer acted like nothing unusual had happened, keeping his expression relaxed and normal, like he didn’t just share a small part of their moment with the world.