Foretold by the stars

"Sweet days of summer, the jasmine's in bloom July is dressed up and playing her tune And I come home from a hard day's work And you're waiting there, not a care in the world—-" I stopped strumming my guitar when my friend, Anika sat lazily in front of me. I looked at her confused. Why is she here at this hour? The weather isn't that good today. "Don't look at me like that. I'm with Jennifer." she said defensively. Referring to my cousin. As if on cue, Jen came into view, wiping off her jacket. "What are you guys doing here? It's raining so hard." "Your Mama called me." she answered . "Apparently her daughter is being weird again." Jen sighed. She sat down beside Anika who's now busy combing her slightly wet hair. "And Anika..." she shrugged. "...well, she's supportive." She added then looked at Niks mockingly. "Supportive your face!" Anika said and rolled her eyes. "Oh! You girls are here!" My mom chirped happily. My friends went to greet my mother who looks relieved seeing my friends. "I'm glad you made it! Thanks for coming over, Jen, Niks..." "No problem, Auntie. Anytime!" Jen said. "Wait, I'll go get some cookies for you two. Just as promised." My mother winked at them. I followed her with my gaze as she enters the kitchen. The two went back to sit again. "Really, why does my mom asked for you two?" "Shie," My cousin began. "Tell us. He's back in town, isn't he? Is that why Auntie is so worried about you?" Jennifer asked being all so serious. "Is that why you're both here? To check up on me?" I laughed at them. "You guys are so-so funny! I cannot believe it!" "Duh, no!" Anika said churlishly. "Im here for the cookies!" She said aggressively. And that's when my mother came back with a plate full of her baked cookies and crinkles. She then went back again to the kitchen this time to get us milk. "I really hate the rain. So hassle." Anika murmured. I smiled at her. "I don't." She rolled her eyes at me. Between us three, Anika is the short tempered one, but she can also be very playful at times. Jennifer is neutral while I can say, I'm the most patient one. "Duh, Shielo! If it wasn't obvious enough ..."she said sarcastically. "He's only here in the country during what? During the rainy season? What is he? A mushroom?" I laughed a little. "Shie, aren't you getting tired of this?" My cousin, Jen sighed. "It's been what? 4?5 years? How many? I lost count." I looked away and became silent for a moment. Avoiding Jennifer's gaze. Sometimes, i hate it whenever she's being this straightforward. Thankfully, my Mom came back again, saving me from that awkward moment. She gave us our glasses and left us three again to talk. Anika is now busy munching her food. This time, I know I won't be able to escape their queries anymore. I was just making the atmosphere light a while ago because I can feel it. My friends aren't taking any more of my nonsense. After all, this has been going on for years now. Im guessing, maybe, they are getting sick of it. I sighed again. Why does my mother have to call them anyway? Especially at this kind of weather. Maybe that's the reason why my friends are both so triggered. "He's back in town, right? Are you two communicating again?" I shook my head. "No. Anyway, what else is new? You know, he's always like that." "Believe me. We know." Jen sighed. "But is he really coming back again this year?" I took my cup of milk before answering. "I don't know" I said. "He still hasn't replied to me . "I don't even know if he still has plans on contacting me." I shrugged. "He told me that he'll be back again this year. It's his school break so I guess so. Besides his family does that every year. I just don't know when or if he's changed his mind. Maybe a change of plans? I have no idea." "You know what, Shielo..." Anika paused for a while to drink her milk. "... I want to punch that guy's face. He's so complicated!" She said still annoyed. "It's been 4 or 5 years, right? We still haven't even seen him personally. If not for the pictures you've shown us before, I don't think I'll believe that you're in love with an actual person—." "Excuse me, I'm not inlove with him!" I said defensively. Cutting her off. "Yeah right! Tell that to the wind. No one's gonna believe you here." My cousin butted in. I shook my head in dismay. I refused to acknowledged my feelings for him. I know I feel something for him but I want to address that as a crush. It might seem childish but that's how I like to call it. We've know each other for 5 years now but we only see each other personally for four times. He's only here in the country during June or July. During the rainy season and I can only meet him once a year. For one whole night and i considered myself lucky enough because atleast, i get to spend an entire evening with him. He's with me after sunset and before the break of dawn. I can't accept the fact that I've been waiting for him for over 5 years now. I can't allow myself to love him because I know it's not going to work but at the same time, I can't stop waiting for him. I guess I'm stupid and very very vague. I tried going out with some other guys after him just like what my friends suggested but I just couldn't find myself enjoying their company like I enjoy his. Maybe because I'm still not done liking him. I've realized that maybe, all of these butterflies will just fade away on its own or i will just come back to my senses one day when all of this is enough and too much for me to handle and that waiting for him will get me nowhere. That is why i just embrace the joy and pain of waiting for him in the side. It'll end soon and I'm looking forward to that day. But for now, i'll just continue liking him. "You know what, Shie..." I looked at Jen. "Dom's cousin..." Dominic is her boyfriend and they're together for 4 years now. Going stronger than ever. "Remember his cousin, Mark? He's asking Dom and me about you. He seems really interested with you." "Who?" "Mark." "Who's Mark ?" I asked again confused. "Mark, the soldier-guy? OMG!" Anika shrieked. "Remember the guy you told me that looked like coach Bamboo of TVPH?"she nudged me. "Oh! I thought his name is Clark?" "Aishh, Shielo. All that matters to you is that guy. Come on! Mark's hot too. Got nice build." Anika said playfully. Wiggling her eyebrows. "I guess so. He's a soldier after all." "Arghh! You're so annoying!" I laughed at Anika's annoyed face. "What about him, Jen?" She asked my cousin instead. "He's asking me for Shie's number. Can I give it to him?" "I don't think that's a good idea." I said lazily . "Oh come on! Try getting to know him atleast. So you can free your mind off that guy!" Anika argued. "I'm going to give him your number, okay? If he texts you, reply or ignore him. Do whatever you like." Jennifer said. "Yeah whatever." I sighed. "He can just add me on Wemessage." I added. "As if you don't deactivate your socmed." She said rolling her eyes. "Whatever." I laughed at her. They know me too well. The two of them eventually left. It's nearly dark outside and the rain has stopped pouring. They took that opportunity to go home. I went to my room and as i lie myself to sleep, i decided to check my socmed for any news or updates about him. I opened our last conversation in Insta. I read it for one last time before i deactivated it again. "Can we talk again? Tonight, is it okay?" And I replied "Okay. Later." I remembered it was morning and I was at a convenience store eating breakfast with my friends before going inside our university. I felt so giddy and excited the whole day just because of his text. I missed him. I missed him everyday! I also remembered, after I got home that day, i immediately charge my phone because I thought, just like the usual, we'll be having our late night video calls. I even made sure I did my skin care before the call start so that I will look fresh and not haggard from school and the traffic. But it didn't happen. I slept really late that night waiting but not even a single message came. That was months ago. Until now, i still haven't heard anything from him. Not even on wassup. I don't know what's happening and I got worried. Knock on wood but I thought something bad might've happened again but then I saw his aunt posting a picture of them having a family dinner outside. He seems happy and very fine so I did not bother asking him what was going on. We, sometimes, also talked on wemessage but he also left me there on seen. Again. I got confused but then I don't want to come as a nosy girl. I'm bothered but I don't want to bother him. That's why I decided to keep it that way. Anyway it's not the first time that he did this. He always gives me this feeling that keeps me down. But I guess as time goes by, the intensity changes. I don't know if I've become numb or is it because I'm so used to it already. I think, he's met another me again.