Every Flight Counts

Chapter 5

Peace

"Guys, punta na raw sa Audi!"

Natigil ang pagbo-browse ko sa cellphone dahil sa pagsigaw ng kaklase naming student assistant ng college secretary.

"Tara, Ellie?" aya sakin ni Yael.

Tumango ako at niligpit na muna ang mga gamit sa bag. Pagkatapos ay cellphone at wallet lang ang binitbit bago tumayo. Sabay na kaming lumakad palabas ni Yael. Sama-sama kaming magkaka-klase na naglakad patungong Auditorium.

Ngayon ang departmental freshmen orientation namin sa aero-sci. Bukod sa naganap na overall university convocation noong bago pa man opisyal na magsimula ang klase ay meron pang bukod na ganito para sa bawat course.

"Ready ka na ba?" ngisi sakin ni Yael.

Sinimangutan ko siya. Parang naramdaman ko na naman ang munting pagbaliktad ng sikmura.

"Wag kang epal," I uttered.

He chuckled. "Gulat ako pa-f*******: f*******: ka na lang kanina eh,"

I looked away. "Nililibang ko lang yung sarili ko para mawala yung kaba,"

He made a face. "Sus, kaya mo yan! Ang tapang-tapang mo kaya," halakhak niya.

I shook my head.

Mamaya kasi sa program ay isa ako sa mga magsasalita. Inatasan kami ni Spencer na magbigay ng short testimony tungkol sa journey ng pagpasok namin sa PCAST bilang topnotchers. 

What the f**k kasi ba't kailangan pa ng ganun? Alam kong sa ngayon, maaaring ang tingin ng mga kaklase ko ay sanay ako sa mga ganitong bagay pero ang totoo ay hindi. Wala pa kong kahit na anong experience sa pagdedeliver ng formal speech. And it's going to be in the freaking auditorium. That place is huge as hell. I'm sure maraming tao. All those eyes would be all over me later. Just the thought of it made me shudder in fear.

Pagdating sa Audi ay natanaw ko na agad ang sandamakmak na taong nagse-settle na sa kani-kanilang upuan.

"San daw ba kayo uupo?" tanong ni Yael.

"Kahit san lang daw muna tas ipapatawag na lang kami pag malapit na. Sama muna ko sa inyo," sabi ko habang sinusundan namin ang ibang X1.

Tumango-tango siya. Sa hindi kalayuang row mula sa stage pumwesto ang mga naunang kaklase namin kaya't mukhang hindi na kami mahihirapan mamaya. 

Sobrang ganda ng Audi at theatre-like ang design. Pati ang mga upuan ay luxurious at higit na maganda pa sa mga nakikita sa sinehan.

Nanatili kami sa may aisle habang hinihintay na makapasok sa linya ng mga upuan ang sinusundan namin. 

Nakita ko pa si Zaiden na prenteng nakaupo na sa parehong row na pinapasukan namin.

Umusad ang linya at dumiretso na kami ng lakad. Namataan ko ang pag-ngisi ni Zaid pagkakita sa akin.

"Hi, Ellie. Shoutout mo 'ko mamaya ah," he chuckled.

I rolled my eyes while passing by.

"Ba't di ka sa kaibigan mo magsabi," bulong ko.

Sakto namang nagtama ang mata namin ni Spencer na katabi niya pala. s**t. Hindi ko iyon napansin kanina dahil natatakpan ni Zaid. I instantly looked away because my heartbeat raced at the view of him.

Ilang saglit lang pag-upo namin ay nagsimula naman na ang event. Halos hindi ko naman iyon masundan dahil iniisip ko lang ang gagawin ko mamaya. Nakakainis pala yung ganitong pakiramdam. Hindi ako mapakali. Hindi ko na lang pinapahalata dito kay Yael na katabi ko kasi baka asarin lang ako. Kunwari na lang ay chill lang ako at pahikab-hikab pa.

"Ms. Faustino and Mr. Montero?"

Napalingon ako sa mahinang nagsalita sa may gilid.

"Standby na raw po kayo sa side ng stage,"

Napalunok ako sa narinig. Chineer pa kami nang mahina ng mga kaklase namin.

Nang makita kong tumayo na si Spencer ay gumaya na rin ako at naglakad. Narinig ko pa ang boses ni Zaid.

"Don't forget to plug me, Ellie. Tell them I'm single," it sounds like he was grinning.

Narinig ko pang sinitsitan at sinaway siya ng mga prof sa likod dahil sa ingay niya habang nagpo-program. Hindi ko na lang siya tinignan para kunwari ay hindi ko siya kilala.

Nang makarating sa aisle ay saka ko lang napansin na hinihintay pala ko ni Spencer. My breathing hitched.

He then turned on his feet and started walking without saying anything. Tahimik na sumabay na rin ako. We walked in silence side by side.

Pagdating namin sa gilid ng stage na natatakpan ng kurtina ay may sumalubong na staff sa amin.

"Hi, after this speaker ay may isa pang magsasalita bago si Ellie then si Spencer naman," she said while looking at the paper she's holding.

Tumango-tango naman ako.

She smiled at us. "Upo muna kayo rito,"

We sat on the chair she offered. Mula sa inuupuan namin ay kitang-kita ang podium kung nasaan ang nagsasalita.

Wala nang mapaglagyan ang kaba ko. Hindi na rin ako makapag-focus sa kahit ano.

Kahit ang pagiging magkadikit namin ngayon ng crush ko ay hindi ko na mabigyang pansin. My nervousness is distracting me. Even his manly scent can't calm the heck out of me.

Panay ang taas-baba ng nagkukuyakoy kong binti dahil sa kaba. Napalingon ako kay Spencer at naabutan siyang nakatingin don. Hindi ako sigurado dahil baka kalmadong nakatulala lang naman pala siya sa banda roon.

I sighed. "Buti ka pa hindi kinakabahan,"

He looked at me with his unworldly eyes. His stare was too much for me to handle. I almost stopped breathing.

"You're nervous?" he shot up his brow.

Oh wow, his voice. How can he sound so manly in anything he says?

I swallowed. "Sobra," I straightened on my seat. "How do you even manage not to get nervous?" I curiously asked him.

He looked at me for a while before both his brows slowly raised in amusement. 

"Who says I don't?" he countered.

Lumukot ang mukha ko sa sinabi niya. Halata naman kasing hindi siya kinakabahan. Walang kabahid-bahid ng kaba sa itsura niya. 

"Kunwari ka pa eh pinaglihi ka nga ata sa confidence at conviction," I sighed. "Samantalang ako wala nang mapagsidlan yung kaba.." 

Napako ang tingin ko sa kawalan. I suddenly felt something heavy on my chest. Sa pinaghalong bigat at kabog ng dibdib ay para akong biglang lumutang. 

It's like there was air on my brain. The heaviness is slowly building up on me.

I swallowed the lump on my throat. "I'm.. actually used to people not believing in me.." I muttered in a small voice. "Doubting my skills.. and belittling my abilities."

I heaved a sigh while dumbfoundedly staring into nothing. "I'm... afraid I'll mess this up." I uttered almost in a whisper. "I badly dont wanna mess this up.."

Nanatili akong nakatulala matapos wala sa sariling mailabas ang bigat sa dibdib. 

I was suddenly bothered by the heavy stares on me.

I looked sideways and met his gaze.

Spencer was staring right into me.

His eyes were... talking. It's like it was trying to convey something on me. It seems like it was saying something I can't even figure out.

"Drinks po muna kayo,"

I almost flinched at the sudden interjection. A staff was holding two bottles of cute-sized juice for us. Medyo nagyeyelo pa iyon.

"T-thank you po," medyo tuliro pang sabi ko nang iabot niya sa amin iyon.

Napakurap-kurap ako. Sa taranta ay sinimulan ko na lang na buksan iyon at balak nang inumin. Aktong iaangat ko na iyon palapit sa bibig ko nang-

"Don't." 

Nabitin sa ere ang kamay ko sa biglang pagsasalita ni Spencer.

"It's too cold."

Natigilan ako.

"Huwag mo na munang inumin,"

Nalaglag ang panga ko.

Nagtatagalog pala 'to?

"You might.. catch a sore throat," 

I blinked repeatedly.

He sighed. "Nauuhaw ka na ba?"

Wala sa sariling umiling ako nang marahan.

He nodded. "If you're thirsty maybe we can just ask for some water... But this one, just drink this after your testimony,"

I almost shivered at his gentle voice.

"Ms. Faustino, next na po kayo."

My gaze didn't left Spencer's eyes. The same way he didn't left mine. 

He offered me his hand.

"Let me hold it for you until you're finished."

I felt a ticklish sensation in my stomach.

I feel like I was floating as I placed the bottle on his hand.

I slowly stood up and walked towards the stage while feeling so much lighter this time.

He didn't wish me luck but it feels like he did. He didn't tell me to do well but I feel like I will.

I reached the podium with a pleasent expression on my face. 

I flashed a smile before my mouth automatically opened to start my speech. I let out the words come out naturally. It was as if I was an expert in public speaking. I was beaming with confidence and joy. I uttered every word with the rightful intonation.

I made an eye contact to anyone that meets my gaze. I scanned the whole place and felt pleased as I see everyone listen with interest.

But someone caught my attention.

That someone stood out the most from the crowd.

Zaid was slightly leaning forward on his seat as he intently listen at me. He was staring at me with his eyes filled with pure interest. Everybody else also seem interested but he's different.

The interest in his eyes looks... genuine.. and honest.

My breathing suddenly became unusual. I looked away before I even stutter. 

My gaze turned sideways and it caught a glimpse of Spencer.

He was watching me attentively. 

He looks dashing right in his manly uniform suit. His black necktie was freely hanging in the white tucked-in polo. His hands are holding the cute bottles. Our drinks.

I felt something tugging in my heart at the view of his masculine figure holding the cute bottles while patiently waiting for me to get done.

Suddenly, my breathing came back to its normal pace.

My insides are at peace again.