I See The Light

11 years ago, I've never had anything I’ll cherish. At this point, I could just run away from home. Everyone is blaming me. Voices are always keeping me up, telling me I should give up. I want everything to be just as simple as the families I see in the park. Kids at my age have smiles and are filled with their parents’ love. No one or two bruises, no fear of seeing through their faces. I just want to wake up and realize that I’m at home. "Wake up, you cretin!" As soon as I heard my mother screaming at me, she kicked my back and carelessly grabbed my pillow. I sit as I starch the back of my head. She suddenly grabs my hair from the back of my head and turns my face towards her. “Ouch, Ma!” I scream as she keeps pulling my hair with a mad face. Her brown hair was in a messy bun and she looked like she hadn’t gotten a good night's sleep. Ah yeah, she was playing mahjong with our neighbors all night. She probably didn’t get a take back from it. The room was filled with the smell of cigarettes. The old hag probably got here. " Why didn't you die? Nobody even likes you here! You should die! " She shouts at me and starts beating me up. I keep crying and asking for forgiveness because I was born. I held her right leg and begged her to forgive me. "I’m sorry Ma. Forgive me for getting out into this world. Ma, I’m sor---Ah! " I dropped to the floor. She didn’t even hesitate to think. She grabs the chair that was in the corner and uses it to beat her back down. "You f*****g annoying bastard!" She gets out of the room and shuts it loudly. Why? What did I do to deserve this? I tried my best to get up and clean the room since I knew that my father would be here at any moment. He’ll be home and drunk. The pain always weighs on the pride. I get out of the room and look around the mess. Everything is a mess: boxes of cigarettes, plastics from the convenience stores, take-out boxes, and just about everything is a mess. I didn’t see my mother; she was probably in their room. I start cleaning and cooking before my drunken father comes home, asking why there’s no new cooked food before he arrives. I cooked some chicken stew and rice. As I was washing the dishes, a loud voice got my attention. " "Hey, Joel! Let’s grab a drink later---" I rushed to the living room to see what happened, and there was vomit everywhere. He looks at me with angry eyes. "Bastard, clean your shits!" He shouts madly at me and walks past to the kitchen. “Great! You aren’t useless at all! " He shouted and went to their room. I cleaned the mess and started preparing the food. I grab three utensils for the three of us. My mother and father get out of their rooms. She looks confused as she looks at the utensils. "Who’s eating with us?" She asked. My father sits in front and starts eating quietly. "No one, I'll eat as well."To my surprise, my mother sits down and starts putting food on my plate for the first time. Did she already accept my apology? Are we going to be happy again? This is probably the best day ever! As soon as she’s done putting the food on my plate, I grab the spoon. "When did I say that you could already eat?" She coldly said as soon as I was about to put the food in my mouth. I put the food back on the plate, and she gets my plate. She dropped the food to the ground and put the plate back in front of me. What? I was about to get a new rice cooker when Mom said something. "I didn’t also tell you to get a new food. Eat down here " What? I was confused. I look at my father, who didn’t even flinch or glance after hearing it. I looked again at my mother. She was serious. I stood up and walked to the place where she dropped the food. “Eat! How dare you sit in front of Grace?! You don’t deserve it, you demon! " She shoves my face into the food that was dropped. She put her foot in the back of my head. "I will never f*****g tell you to eat with us and will never f*****g tell you to eat with us!" My head started hurting. She removes her foot and starts eating. I eat with my hand. I cleaned and washed the dish. I head outside since the mahjong game will start in the house again. I roamed around the neighborhood, thinking I could have some friends. As I walk around, I run errands for the small stores and people so I can have some money to buy some snacks. I earn a bit of money and I stop to buy some ice cream. It’s not cheap, though I made enough money that I could afford a popsicle. I was seated in the front of the store. "Hey..." I look to my left as I lick my popsicle. It’s a kid around my age with good and clean clothes. He doesn’t look like this from here. He has clean skin without any bruises or scars. "Yes?" I asked. "Do you know where the highway is? I’m lost and I can’t see my driver. " Ah, rich kid. I guess that’s how hard it is to look for the highway in this neighborhood. He seems scared. "Yes." "Alright, come on. The highway is 3 blocks away, and we’ll turn left. " How could this kid just trust anyone? "So, what’s your name? It doesn’t look like you live here. " I ask as I take a glance at him. "No, I’m from the city. I live in the next neighborhood. I’m Tadashi. " Oh, the upper class. "Oh, I’m Levi. I live a few blocks from here." He took a glance at my bruises. I forgot I was wearing shorts. I try to cover my bruises on my arms. "What’s that?” He asks as he points to the purple bruises on my arms. "These? Uhm, just got these from my parents." I hesitated before telling him. We stop at the corner of the road, and he looks at me confusedly. " "Your parents did these?" He asked. What? Has he never been beaten before? "My parents do. I don’t know any other family or your family. Did your mother beat you? " He looks at me and shakes his head. I guess you didn’t suffer like me. "My mom and dad love me. They didn’t beat me, but they grounded me if I did something wrong." "You have great parents." Suddenly, a black car stops in front of us. A man gets out in formal clothing like in the movies. He looks like he’s in his 30’s. "For godsake, Master, your mother would kill me if you didn’t get home at 6. Where have you been?" The man looks at me. He walked in circles around me and stared at my body. He put his index finger and thumb on his jaw line as he put his left hand in his pocket. He bends over and directly looks at my eyes. "Hmmm, sadness, fear, and abuse." He says as he looks at me and stands up. I guess my eyes can’t lie. Everything is so messed up that even this person can tell. Well, I’ve been living in that hell. This neighborhood is hell. What do you expect in my own house? The unwanted kid and the gamblers' parents "I hope in the future you’ll have a greater life than this kid. I know how you feel, kid. I’ve been there. Well, say goodbye, Master. We still need to fetch your sister, and your father is waiting. " He proceeds to open the backseat. I guess it's getting late also. That means I’m back to getting beaten. I stared at my feet and took a glance at his good shoes. I wonder when I will ever have a pair of shoes. "I’ll go home now, Levi. I’ll see you tomorrow! " I look at him as he’s about to hop in the car. Tomorrow? "What do you mean?" I ask, confusedly. "What do you mean, ‘what do you mean?’ We’ll play again tomorrow, right Alfred? " He looked at the man who called him Master. He took a deep breath and said, "Yes, my Master will be here." My lips formed a smile. Tadashi hops in the car, and Alfred looks at me. He pats my head and smiles. "Don't worry, we'll be here at 4 p.m."He walks to the driver's seat and leaves. I guess that’s it. Ever since then, we have always played Alfred became a guardian for us. I still get beaten, but who cares? I have a friend. For the first time, a friend who’s like a family to me Who makes me feel that I still have hope in my situation? I guess I’ll treasure this moment that I’ll have today. For the first time, I went to the mall that I always see on television. The arcade was also fun. I also learned how to read and write. I don’t go to school, but Alfred and Tadashi help me a lot. I want to learn more, even basic Japanese. I just learned that Tadashi’s mother is Japanese. We’d been like this for a year until one night. I was preparing my bed. It’s already around 2 or 3 in the morning. In the living room, there are still people playing gambling games with my parents. "Hey, have you heard about the tall guy roaming around here? Pedro just sold his ten-year-old son to that man for $500,000.I was also planning to sell my niece! I heard Juanita talking to her co-players. It's revolting." My parents would never sell me to these people. They'd rather have me as the bastard that always cleans up their mess and cooks for them. "Dollars?! Not Pesos!?", I heard Mercedes ask. "Yes! Dollars! Pedro is already making money! He even bought a house in the city and started his business! He even brought a red car! He’s rich now! " I head to bed because my eyes are starting to fall out. Later that morning, I saw two tall men in the living room with my mother, who was smoking a cigarette in the corner. I head to the kitchen to cook for them. One man was sitting on the sofa while the other was standing beside him. There’s a duffle bag on the table. "Okay, 600 grand for that child." As soon as I hear the men talking, I automatically look at them. No way!There’s no way she’s selling me out to these people! My mother was smiling at the money and my father gave a handshake to the man who was sitting. The other one was walking forward to me and getting something from his back, a handkerchief. “No!Mom! No way!Please! I’ll be nice! " I kneel and keep crying. I kept asking for forgiveness until the person put the handkerchief in my nose and mouth.