Title: You Don't Deserve Him My mother was sitting in the living room.“Maa, why are you still up?” I asked.“I was waiting for you. You said you’d be back sooner,” she replied.She turned on the lights and noticed my dress was stained.“Meredith, your dress is stained,” she said.“Maa, I got my period and came straight home,” I explained.“Aii, I always tell you to carry pads with you!” she scolded.“Maa, I forgot,” I said as I headed to my room to grab a towel and take a bath.I sat on my bed and cried it out.The next day, I woke up with puffy eyes.My mother wasn’t home. I took a bath and then sat down to watch TV. I talked to myself for a while.“Michelle, you're such a fool for letting him take advantage of you,” I thought to myself.“No, but he was my boyfriend, and I never expected this from Rick,” I continued my conversation with myself.I scooped some food onto my plate. Later in the day, my mother came home with a lot of stuff.“Maa, what’s with all the things?”“They’re for you,” she said.I looked at the items and placed them in my room.I started acting strange around my mother. She asked me if something was wrong, and if I wanted to talk. “No, Maa,” I replied.“I just need a little privacy,” I said.“Okay, if you say so.” The holiday was over, and I went back to school. I didn’t even look at Rick. He tried to make things right with me. One day, he sent me a message saying he was sorry. I forgave him, and we moved on.It had been two months since Rick and I had been together. I started feeling nauseous and dizzy. I had no appetite and didn’t feel like doing anything. My periods were still normal, though. I found this strange. After school, I bought a pregnancy test.I took the test early in the morning, and it was positive. I called Rick, but he didn’t answer. I sent him a message, and he left me on read. I sat on the balcony with the pregnancy test in my hand, sitting on a chair. I called Rick again, but he didn’t pick up. When he finally answered, I cried, “Rick, I’m pregnant.”“Chelle, you’re a whore. Who knows who you slept with. Don’t ever call me again,” he said, and hung up.My mother drove into the yard. I quickly hid the test in my pocket.“Baby, come help me. I brought some groceries.”I helped her and put everything away.I sat in the living room, and my mother sat next to me. I couldn’t hide this from her any longer. I started crying.“Mama, I’m sorry, Maa!”“Mama, it wasn’t intentional. It happened without my consent, but I forgave him. You can beat me up, Maa. I’m sorry,” I cried as I fell to my knees. “I didn’t use my head.”“Baby, what are you talking about?” she asked.I showed her the pregnancy test. She sat still for a moment, then burst into tears. She looked at me, slapped me, and then kissed me.“Oh, baby, it will be okay.”There was no sign of Rick. I later heard that he and his parents had moved away from Suriname.My pregnancy was tough. I gave birth to a boy who looked exactly like his father. My mother continued to support me. I finished school and got a job at Staatsolie. My son was already five years old and attending school.At work, there was a man who liked me, but I was afraid to let him into my life. However, he didn’t give up.I told my mother about him, and she said I should give him a chance. My son, Shawn, kept asking who his father was. I took him to a cemetery and said, “Here lies your father.”Since then, he never asked me again.We had a Christmas party at work, and my mother chose a dress for me. My wide hips and round behind looked so good in that dress that no one at work could take their eyes off me.